Why was I born this way, there must have been a grave sin we all must have committed in our past life… to be born black.
How the world around me had morphed into an ugly waste of an existence. They're idiots! All of them, but this would not be a fair claim if I excluded myself. This I realized at 17.
I was in a boarding school at the time, when during an assembly of a sort an announcement was made by our school priest. This man was someone I wasn't very fond of through we had never had a face to face interaction and I'll explain why someday.
'There has been a worldwide iq test taken recently', he said. He then continued to list the countries that scored the highest points - Japan, china, the U.S, all expected constituents, he then started to meantion the countries that performed the least. Gambia , Zimbabwe, Benin, this too was not a surprise. Then later saving a moment of suspense with a staggering 10 second pause to say the name of the nation we all knew was going to be said. Our nation. Land of the ignorant. Even though it was expected no one would ever think it true that our nation's average was less than 70. This was borderline retarded and my wards exclaimed with surprise. No one thought it true, it was all the white man spreading the hateful propaganda he so frequented. This looked like a good excuse through a general lense but looking through a better zoomed glass you would see through the claim,even though I admit the outcome of the test was greatly exaggerated, my people truly were a band of idiots.
There was an old saying,'if you needed hide anything from a Blackman hide it in a book'. A sad truth of our ignorance. But be weary not to hide it in one of no use but to be ingested then spit out like ( a mindless read if I do put it - one read only with the obligation to pass a poorly set up exam) as my people were forced to consume such. They had woken up to education as the key to riches in the new world but had not yet been awake long enough to understand that education only to gives platform to creativity. The creativity they had disposed of in their embarrassing syllabus. Their only goal to be a corpus of past greatness, never to be great themselves as greatness required uniqueness, the uniqueness too few of my people possessed.
I do not write to be a wake up call to the blacks nor to belittle them to the world. This would achieve nothing. I do not seek to bring peace or perfection, as at 17 I realized there is no such thing as a perfect world. This is all vanity. Humans in themselves stride for the imperfection they do long to do away with. We do not want to be perfect , neither do we deserve to be. What a joke of man, thinking he would reach an equilibrium between interest and gay someday in this world. At 16 I truly did wish to rid the world of sadness I truly did.
Later I had realized that as my people were idiots intellectually our opposites we are idiots in every other way. In this I realized that we are all equal, we are all lost and we are all sad. Some sadder than others but none happy.