Sigh. That jerk certainly knows something's off with his childhood friend…
Rodion sat cross-legged on the grass beneath a tree, his elbow resting on his knee as he supported his chin with his hand. A couple of sheep lounged nearby, one of them the plump creature that had tricked him the other day, now curiously sniffing at his hair.
He's watching his siblings from a distance, together with Leonid and Mikhail tending some sheep and cows. They were preparing water for the cattle. Rodion scoffed every time he caught Mikhail stealing a glance at Leonid.
I wasn't able to ask him about what he meant earlier because everyone was present. And I can't get him alone to talk because he's sticking closely to Leonid.
The fat sheep that sniffed his hair proceeded to munch it.
"Hey! My hair's not your food! Get away from me…" However, the sheep was strong and refused to let go of his hair. "Ugh…you!"
He tried to pull his hair, but he felt his scalp tinge with pain, "Hey, hey! Are you trying to get me bald?! Ah!" The sheep yanked him before it let go, a few strands of his hair were on its mouth.
"You! That was not so cute at all!"
"Meeee-eeee"
"Oh shut up! You're the one who hurt me!" He hurled back, resulting in the poor, fat sheep retracing a little. Just as he thought he might have scared it when he raised his voice and felt sorry for it but then the sheep jumped, its head hitting his, and ran away.
Ugh…F*ck...!
He watched the sheep run its way towards where his siblings were. The sleeping sheep around him were still sound asleep. Yawning, Rodion settled himself in a more comfortable position as he watched the others closely from afar. A smile formed on his lips. He was happy, but he couldn't help but feel pity for the original Rodion.
Before the guilt consumed him, he stood up, stretched his muscles and decided to take a little stroll around the farm.
The others were having a lot of fun. He would love to join them, but perhaps later, he said to himself. He wished to clear his mind and calm down the emotions that were gradually swelling up inside him. He made his way around the maple tree and languidly walked his way to the pastures, feeling the coolness of the wind.
I'm certain that the original Rodion is still alive. He can't affect my thoughts and consciousness. However, he has a strong emotional influence on me. I want to heed him out of guilt for taking over his life, but... If I continue to obey the tugging emotions within me that's not mine, despite no harm, will I risk losing myself in the process?
He continued his stroll, his mind drifting. He knew it wasn't just a matter involving him and the original Rodion. There must have been some other factor that caused the transmigration, and if his speculation was correct, there must have been another being that caused it.
"Rodya?"
Rodion flinched and snapped from his reverie when he heard Leonid call out to him. He glanced over his shoulder and noticed that the blonde man was looking at him with concern. "Lyonya, what is it?"
He saw the other smiled at him and strode his way next to him, "Mother has prepared lunch. Vitya suggested if we could have it outside, to which they immediately agreed." Leonid paused, examining his friend's face before he continued, "Are you alright?"
Rodion turned his gaze away and stared ahead the rough terrain. After a couple of seconds, he said, "I have a strong feeling that I am not me, that someone is residing inside me and influencing my emotions…It's a bit scary. What if I lost the battle and completely lost myself?" He didn't look at Leonid, his gaze cast at the horizon. He wasn't expecting any answers, he only wished to lessen his thoughts to feel a little lighter.
Leonid went silent, unable to say anything for a moment. "You know, when Mishka asked us that we take you here with us for as long as needed, he told us that you will soon be alright, and he believes that you just need time to figure it out."
He looked away from Rodion and joined him in watching the scenery on the horizon. "I don't know exactly what happened between you and your mother, but you can stay here for as long as you want."
Rodion smiled. Although Leonid had no idea about his exact situation, he found comfort in his words.
"Thank you,"
"It's nothing. We've been friends since we were kids. It's frustrating how you always keep your negative emotions to yourself." A smile formed on his lips, and he added, "Did you know that I always cried in secret back when we were kids because I felt so left out in our friendship? Although Mishka always comforted me, I was still jealous every time I watched you two banters."
Rodion couldn't help but laugh. "Why would you be jealous? I hate that guy's guts."
Leonid glanced at him, his smile not fading, "If you think that you are losing the battle in yourself, he should be the sole person who would be able to tell you who you are."
The two went silent. Rodion's mind finally cleared, and he felt a little at ease. Sometimes, it's good to have a friend to talk to. Keeping up the negative emotions could be unhealthy in the long run.
"Why are you guys taking so long?"
Mikhail appeared and inserted himself between them, "The food's ready."
Rodion glanced at the knight, "Lyonya's asking for dating advice."
"Wha— It's nothing. Don't mind him, Mishka, we should go now. I'm starving." Leonid shook his head, expecting the two to be at it again with their bantering, before turning his back to them.
The two stared at Leonid's figure for a moment before Mikhail turned to look into Rodion's eyes.
"What? Are you worried because you know something is off with me?"
His question stirred the knight. Mikhail's eyes darted before he finally looked away, beginning to follow Leonid. But, Rodion once again opened his mouth, "Tell me what you know."