The ink of forgotten future

 Zoned out thinking about the future, if I even have one, I jolted back to reality from the sound of a sharp clang…I looked down to find out that I just broke another one of the cups of this café while cleaning the dishes.

 I frowned and crouched down to pick up the shattered pieces of the cup…the café quiet. The blurry sound of people chit-chatting and soft indie music playing in the background.

 "Why do I have to be so clumsy" I muttered under my breath. A familiar sound of footsteps approaching me…and stopping in front of me, my heart sank.

 I didn't even need to look up to know who it was. I motioned and stood up cradling the pieces of the broken cup.

 Silently standing… "This is not working out Louis" The words of the manager were sharp and cold, his hands folded against his chest. I slightly looked down.

 My fists clenching around the hem of my shirt…and he continued speaking.

 "Gosh, this is the third mistake you have made. I will keep this short Louis----you're fired." I looked at him with widened eyes I swallowed his words and panic washed over me. I protested. 

 "I will be careful next time, I cannot lose this job please---,

 "Enough Louis I have heard enough. You may leave this place now" I looked at him stunned as he cut me off. My knuckles turned white as I clenched my fists tighter my temper losing, and before I could stop myself, I shouted "You know you're just a shitty manager"

 I took off the apron and tossed it away, yanking off my gloves and glaring at him. He stood silent I gave him a final glare before stomping away from there in anger, my footsteps heavy. 

Fired again.

After a while of walking on streets not knowing my destination, probably going home or looking for another job.

 At 20 years old, I've faced many struggles and still haven't quite settled into adulthood. When I was in high school, I lived in Spain with my parents and older sister. I graduated at 17 and decided to move to Berlin, Germany, to live on my own. I imagined it would be a fresh start and an easy transition, just like the protagonists in TV shows. But reality has proven to be much tougher.

 Living alone has been far more challenging than I anticipated. My parents had warned me that it wouldn't be easy, and it turned out they were right. Since moving here five months ago, I've been focusing on my studies at college and trying to make ends meet with part-time jobs. However, I've been fired from six jobs already, and this is my eighth attempt.

 The reasons for my repeated firings include clumsiness, periodic fever syndrome, communication issues, and anger problems.

 I often find myself blaming these issues on my shortcomings. Unfortunately, I can't afford therapy at the moment, but I know I need professional help to address these challenges and improve my situation.

But all that matters is what we learn from these struggles…the experience.

I sighed to myself as I reached in front of my apartment, I inserted the key in the lock and opened it, coming inside and quietly closing the door behind me.

 The apartment is as gloomy as ever just like me, I switched on a dim light in the living room rested myself on the couch, and heavily sighed to myself once again.

 "Should I call Addie?" I muttered questioning myself glancing up at the ceiling. I thought for a moment, nah she must be busy.

 I turned my attention to the laptop on the table. Stretching my arms and shaking off the fatigue, I motivated myself. "No time to rest, Louis!" I said with determination in my eyes as I quickly opened the laptop and began searching for a job.

 After a few hours of browsing various websites, I finally came across a promising job post.

Looking for library assistants – no experience neededPlease contact - 01-32764-39265

 The Antiquarian Library

 99 Mirage Street

 Berlin, Germany 109-0001

 I read the post and tilted my head to the right, "The Antiquarian Library?" I repeated the name and snickered to myself "Never heard of it" … a librarian job? Ugh, I don't know if I will be able to do it….

 I thought for a moment and decided to apply for the job. Glancing at the clock, I realized it was already late. "I should probably go to bed," I said to myself. I got up from the couch, closed the laptop, and yawned as I made my way to the bedroom.

 My mind was still crowded with thoughts when I stumbled on the corner of the bed. I let out a groan of pain and muttered, "Ugh!" Cursing under my breath, I sat on the bed and inspected my toe.

 "Why does everything have to be against me?" I sighed and then lay back on the bed, trying to shake off the frustration. Closing my eyes I drifted off to sleep…