This is the second night of my reincarnation or the night I was born into the body of a poor child. The silence of the nights still fills me with tranquility, just as it did in my previous life, but the only difference is the sound of my 'mother' sleeping beside me.
My mother is a blonde, blue-eyed elf with a small face and she is quite tall. Since I have the memories of the 4-year-old elf child, I know very well that we are in a world where magic is a part of life.
We are living in a tree in the forest, and although the tree hasn't been cut down or reshaped, it has strangely taken the form of a house; there are tables, a bed, a door—everything…
Since I can't sleep as always, I think there's no harm in getting up and exploring my surroundings.
I first dangle my legs over the edge of the bed and manage to get down with difficulty. Although this body is 4 years old, it seems to have the same development as a human baby of 1-5-2 years old; I guess elves really do live for a long time, just like in the stories… At least I can walk and talk.
Normally, I would check what's up the stairs, which my 'mother' has forbidden me to go up, but since climbing the stairs seems too troublesome, I decide to go outside.
The outside was slightly cold, but it was the kind of cold I liked. I looked around, and there were glowing, flying creatures everywhere—though, according to the memories of the child I knew, these were likely 'animal spirits.' With the added light from the moon, I could see my surroundings clearly.
I started wandering around the village. The forest consisted of many houses similar to ours. Even the flowers were glowing in a way I couldn't quite understand, much like the spirits. I walked around for quite a while, and I didn't encounter anyone. It seemed like no one else in the village stayed awake at night. Besides the incredible size of some trees, there wasn't much else that caught my interest.
Finally, I came across a tree in the middle of the forest—a massive tree… and somehow, it was pulling me toward it, as if a part of me was lying inside it. This familiar feeling scared me, and I felt like I should get away from here, but what did I have to lose?
I approached it and placed a hand on the trunk. Immediately, a strange warmth spread from my fingers, flowing into the tree. It felt like my energy was being siphoned from my body, draining into the bark. A pulse of light erupted, and before I could comprehend what was happening, the world around me disappeared.
I was weightless.
Suddenly, I found myself in a space. In this space, I was in the body of my past life, but not at the age I died. I was in my twenties, with long black hair and broad shoulders. Despite my wide shoulders, I was quite skinny—I hated eating. My eyes looked weary from life, pitch black. In this space, I was naked and glowing with a white energy, and I had no genital organs.
I floated there, suspended, like I was neither alive nor dead.
In front of me stood the massive tree, glowing with the same white energy as I was.
A rush of something deep inside me stirred—familiar, yet distant, as though I had known this tree before, but couldn't quite remember when. My entire body tingled with the sensation of being connected to something far greater than myself.
'I see you've found me earlier than I expected, my child,' I heard a voice say. It was the same voice I heard yesterday… So it wasn't a dream.
What was this thing anyway? A god? Or was it something evil that dragged me here?
I clenched my fists, trying to steady myself. "You're the one I heard yesterday, right? You said I should seek my answers. Is this where I get them?" Frustration leaked into my voice, each word heavier than the last.
Silence stretched, the air thick with anticipation. Then the tree glowed brighter. A voice finally responded—soft, wise, unmistakably female. "I am Elderheart, the guardian of the elves."
"Elderheart?" I repeated, feeling the name sit uneasily on my tongue. "What are you?"
"I am the protector of the elves, the heart of their existence in this world. I guide and watch over them. My roots intertwine with their lives," she explained. "For generations, I have been their shield, their wisdom, their keeper of history. And now, I guide you."
Anger surged within me. "So you must be the one who reincarnated me?" I guessed, dread pooling in my stomach.
The silence felt heavy. I didn't need a direct answer to know—she must be the one.
"Then why did you bring me here?" I shot back, resentment twisting my voice.
No response. My breath quickened, each beat echoing my frustration. "Why did you reincarnate me?! I finally... finally gathered the courage to take my own life, and now I'm here, thrown into this world without an answer!" My fists clenched tighter, my feelings bubbling over. "What do you want from me?!"
Still, the tree only glowed, silence wrapping around us like a shroud. And then, it hit me.
"You said you're the protector of elves," I whispered, my throat tight with emotion. "Then why... why did you take this child's life for me?! Does it not weigh on you? You killed an innocent child just to put me in its place? For someone who couldn't even bear the weight of his own existence?"
The air felt charged with my anger and guilt. I stared at the glowing tree, demanding an answer. Finally, the voice returned, calm and steady.
'Live your second life, Lio,' she said softly. 'Play, learn, do the things you couldn't or didn't in your previous life. That is all you need to do for now'
After the encounter with Elderheart, I stumbled back to the treehouse, my legs shaky from everything I had learned—or hadn't. The world felt heavier now, as if the weight of two lives was pressing down on my small frame. Somehow, I made it to my bed and fell asleep the moment my head hit the pillow, exhaustion overtaking me.
——— Four Weeks Later ———
The sun was streaming in through the leaves of the treehouse when I woke up. It had been four weeks since my strange encounter with Elderheart, and I'd been slipping out at night whenever I couldn't sleep. Despite my attempts to maintain some semblance of a routine, I still found myself restless, the pull of the night stronger than ever.
I never told my mother about the nights spent wandering under the glowing moon, watching the spirits float lazily through the air. She was starting to notice something, though. I wasn't going out during the day, and she was concerned.
This morning, her worry spilled over into words.
"Lio, are you feeling alright?" she asked, her voice soft but tinged with concern. She stood in the doorway, her blonde hair catching the morning light. "You haven't been going outside much during the day. It's not good for you to stay inside all the time."
I avoided her gaze, fiddling with the edge of the blanket. "I'm fine, really. I just don't like being outside when it's too bright."
She frowned, her blue eyes narrowing slightly. "That's not like you. You used to love playing outside. What changed?"
'That's not like you'... Guilt washed over me. I hated seeing her worry, hated that I was causing it. I'd already been burdened with this second life—now I had to carry the weight of her concern, too. Her concerned gaze reminded me of my mom... I mean she is my mom too but... ahhh two different live's memories, messing up my mind.
"I'll go outside more, I promise," I said quickly, hoping to ease her worry. The truth was, I didn't mind being out—I just preferred the quiet and peaceful nights. But seeing the way her eyes softened at my words, I knew I couldn't keep her concerned about it forever.
I got up, to keep my promise, and stepped outside as soon as I could because if I postponed it, I know I'd never go outside with new excuses.
Now came the harder part—finding friends, Considering I hadn't seen any benefit from my friends in my past life, and that I couldn't even remember their names in my last years, it seemed like a pointless effort.
I slapped my cheeks to snap myself out of it and thought:
'You're just making excuses, you introverted dickhead. I'll go and make some friends—it shouldn't be that hard as a kid. Besides, I don't really have to become their friend for real; just calming my mother's concern will be enough.'
Wandering through the village again, I noticed a group of kids playing near a clearing by the river. Laughter echoed through the air as they chased each other around. They were having so much fun that, for a moment, I stood frozen, behind a tree, watching them.
'Now is the hard part…' I thought to myself, shifting uncomfortably. I could just walk up to them and say, "Let's play together" like I used to when I was actually a kid. But it felt weird now, like something that should come naturally wasn't as easy anymore.
I tried to take a step forward but stopped halfway. Should I just join in and act like I belong? What would they think? The thoughts swirled in my mind, each one making me hesitate more.
In the end, I couldn't bring myself to approach them. I spended couple hours, watching them, then I turned and quietly walked away, heading back toward home. Each step felt heavier, guilt creeping in the further I went.
When I got home, my mother greeted me with her usual warmth. She was busy preparing something for dinner when she glanced over and asked, "Did you have fun today, Lio?"
I paused, guilt washing over me. I didn't want to worry her. "Yeah… I did," I lied. The words came out so easily, and immediately, I felt terrible. 'I've already started lying to her, this easily…' I thought.
I ate dinner in silence, still feeling that knot in my stomach, and went to bed not long after. Hours passed, but sleep never came, as usual.
Eventually, I slipped out of the house again, like I always did. This time, I wandered back to the place where the kids had been playing earlier. The river glistened under the moonlight, the same spot where they'd laughed and played during the day.
I stepped closer to the water and looked down at my reflection. My pitch-black eyes stared back at me, framed by blonde hair, just like my mother's. And, of course, the pointed ears. Tears welled up in my eyes, and before I could stop myself, I sniffled like a little kid.
'What's wrong with you?' I thought bitterly. 'Even as a kid, you can't do it…' I wiped the tears with the back of my hand, frustrated with myself.
As I stood there, lost in my own thoughts, a voice suddenly called out from the trees. "Heey! Is someone there?"
I froze, my eyes scanning the area, trying to pinpoint where the voice was coming from. Before I could decide whether to answer, the voice called out again, more impatient this time.
"Hey! I heard you were crying just now, dont pretend like you don't hear me? Help me!!"
I stepped forward cautiously, following the sound. It wasn't long before I spotted her—a girl with bright red hair tangled up in the low-hanging branches of a tree. She was struggling, arms caught awkwardly between the branches, her green eyes flashing with frustration.
I approached her silently, not saying a word, just staring at her as I tried to figure out how she even managed to get herself stuck like this. She glared at me, her irritation only growing.
"What are you staring at?! Help me, idiot!" she snapped, her cheeks turning red, more from frustration than embarrassment, I guessed. "I was trying to climb up to grab something, and now I'm stuck like this!"
I didn't respond, just quietly reached out and started untangling her arms from the branches. She huffed, clearly annoyed at my lack of conversation, but I could see a flicker of something—maybe guilt—cross her face as I freed her hair from the mess of twigs and leaves.
"There," I said quietly once she was finally free, stepping back.
She brushed herself off, still glaring at me but with less fire than before. "Thanks, I guess," she muttered, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm Aria, by the way. What's your name?"
I stayed silent for a moment, unsure how to respond. I wasn't used to these kinds of interactions anymore. When I didn't answer right away, she scoffed, turning her head slightly away from me.
"If you don't want to tell me, that's fine. Hmph."
Her reaction snapped me out of my daze. I shook my head, realizing I couldn't miss the opportunity to make a friend here. "Lio," I finally said. "My name's Lio."
Aria turned back toward me, her green eyes softening just a little as she uncrossed her arms. For the first time, she didn't seem as annoyed.
"Hmm... I didn't realize you were just a baby in the dark!" she splashed at my face.
"Huh, a baby?! Are you even aware of what you're saying, brat?" I replied without thinking.
This time, instead of getting angry, she started smiling at me and said, "So cute!"
I blushed from embarrassment, wishing she had reacted angrily. Hmm, she doesn't actually seem older than six.
"Ehm... how old are you?" I asked.
"Hmm, me?" she said, proudly placing her hand on her chest and answering, "15."
Huh?! What?! I mean, I had noticed that elves grow slowly, but hearing that still felt strange. Wait a minute, how old is my mom? And where's my dad?!