"Good night, my love," Avery whispers as she rests her two-year-old child, Zach, to sleep. His eyes are a sweet gingerbread brown like hers and his calming blonde hair soothes her soul. How did she get so lucky? The mother thinks to herself as she turns to tiptoe out of the room.
It was at least three in the morning, which to be honest was the record for getting him to sleep lately. He was rambunctious, never wanting to sleep or sit down. Avery vividly remembers him being upset because he didn't get the main role at his daycare. He refused to walk out on stage at all. She sighed. He was just like his father, wherever that man was. He wasn't much, just a high-school sweetheart that went sour. For the past few years, just been 'Avery and Zach: A Show that was Lonely and Never-ending.' The young mother made her way to the kitchen to finally have her serving of dinner.
The kitchen was a pale blue along with white accents. The floor and walls almost seemed more comfortable as mashed peas and what remained of morning oatmeal hugged them.
"Great," She groaned as she placed dinner in the microwave to heat. "Another mess to clean up." The dinner wasn't much, but it was gonna get her through. A classic Salisbury steak with mashed potatoes and gravy. Sounded okay, but tasted of metal and garlic that rolled in your mouth. Avery whimpered as she took out her phone to see if any messages could take her mind off this aching reality of hers... nothing. She rolled her eyes at the blank notification screen. She didn't want to hop on online school yet, so she had some time to herself.
The sound of the microwave beeps pounced on her thoughts like a tiger waiting for its meal. What could she do? Usually, she was up until five getting her headache to sleep, so two whole hours to spare...
She opened her phone to Instagram to text Salma, one of her best friends.
MotherAva: Hay any update on anything?
Salmaroni: Nah, not really.
Salmaroni: How are you doing though?
Avery was first confused by the question but then realized what the girl meant. Right, it's been four years without her mom. When she first passed, Avery would've been devastated. Crying into the pillow; the whole shebang, but having to worry about Zach along with school made life go a whole lot faster.
MotherAva: Yeah, I'm fine actually.
MotherAva: Just tried
Avery and the other continue to text as the girl eats what she can only assume is food. Truth was, Avery didn't know if she had the right to mourn her mother. The woman was caring, smart, basically anything you could say about the goddess. Avery didn't live up to any of that. Her mom died when she was fifteen, so controlling her emotions wasn't easy. Having a dad who was also depressed from it all wasn't easy either.
Thoughts like these continue to run through her mind until she finishes. Maybe she should go up to her, lord only knows how long it's been since she last looked at her mom's grave. It was probably gross with vines all over it. Maybe she could take Zach? He would love to see the corpse that is his grandma. Just as she thought that Avery looked over the baby monitor to see if the boy woke up. To her surprise, he was dead silent. She sighed. She actually got that boy to sleep.
"Maybe I can try to sleep as well." She sighed as she looked at her stained shirt, which was covered in food muck and baby spitup. Honestly, she didn't even feel like changing. Why would she? Only to be greeted with the same whining and fight the next morning. Nope! Just head to sleep. Avery kept repeating the words to herself as carefully balances the tray onto the heaping trash can, she meant to take it out, but later. Always later.
Just head to sleep.
Sleep.
It's been a while since she actually could. Not having to worry about the baby, not having to catch up on late work. Having time to yourself. It felt…nice. Exhausting, but nice. As Avery laid back onto the pillow, she could feel every muscle try and get used to finally not being put into fight or flight. Soon enough, the weight of her eyes became too much to bear. As she slowly closed her eyes she could feel herself slipping away, slowly and slowly.
She slept.