Chereads / A Certain Magical Hogwarts / Chapter 124 - Chapter 124: Snape's "Banana Wand"

Chapter 124 - Chapter 124: Snape's "Banana Wand"

For a split second, Cedric felt like killing William. Then he thought it might be better to vanish altogether to avoid the embarrassment of being publicly humiliated.

Cho just stifled a laugh with her hand and turned her gaze to the other two.

"And who are you? New little wizards?"

"Oh, I'm Hermione Granger. Just call me Hermione," Hermione replied, warmly extending her hand.

"I'm Neville Longbottom. Nice to meet you," Neville managed, stumbling over his words.

After introducing herself, Cho happily pulled out variously sized presents from her bag.

"These are for you all—don't be shy!"

William held a bottle of Lao Gan Ma chili sauce, eyeing the familiar face of the elderly woman on the label with such emotion that he nearly shed tears.

He glanced over at Cedric, remembering how, just last summer, Cedric had bragged about how his dad could get anything, even authentic imported goods, as easily as having tea. 

Yet here they were, with the goods still stuck in customs. Was he kidding?

Cedric, clearly reminded of this as well, chuckled and quickly changed the subject by pulling a box from his pocket. Inside were six identical wands.

"These are new wands I made for you all," he said, beaming. "Give them a try!"

Curious, William took one from the box and gripped it, feeling no particular reaction—which meant the wand wasn't a perfect match for him.

He murmured, "Orchideous," and a bouquet of flowers bloomed at the wand's tip. Taking one stem, he transformed it into a vase, placed the flowers inside, and set it on the table.

"Not bad, though it doesn't quite feel right in my hand," he said after testing it out further.

Cedric grinned proudly. "Of course! Each of these six wands has a core made from a single gorgeous male unicorn's mane… Hagrid helped me find it. They're all twelve and a quarter inches, made from wisteria wood, with good flexibility. 

"They're my prized creations! Someday, when I'm famous, these early pieces will be worth a fortune. Keep them safe—I plan to open a Diggory Wand Museum to commemorate the greatest wandmaker of our era. These wands are like my children…"

Cedric went on in his usual loquacious fashion. Though generally calm and handsome, anyone who knew him well was aware of his talkative nature.

William gave the wand a wave, increasing his magic output.

"Stupefy!"

He'd use this spare wand for duels or anything else against school rules. It wouldn't be traceable and the professors wouldn't find out. 

It was actually Professor Snape who had inspired him. 

In first year, Snape got caught for the second time mainly because of a magical flashback charm that revealed the dark magic used to attack Tywin. Without that evidence, they wouldn't have had much to hold him on.

It was a common practice for Aurors to carry two wands—a backup to avoid being defenseless in a fight if they lost their primary one.

But as William channeled more energy, the wand Cedric had so proudly compared to "Ollivander's work" began to hum, unable to handle the load, like a flickering lightbulb.

"…"

So, this wand could only handle simpler spells, but for anything with more power, it was down to luck? A Schrödinger's Wand.

Cedric, looking awkward, said, "I should've clarified that my work is more on par with 'ten-year-old Ollivander's'… Don't look so unimpressed, William. 

"Wand-making is delicate work. The air quality at Hogwarts, the weather, my mood when crafting—all of it affects a wand's performance."

He tried to explain repeatedly, even suggesting that the unicorn hair might have been misplaced by Hagrid, which caused the wand's unreliable connection.

"Why are they all unicorn hair?" William asked, noting that a custom wand should ideally be made to fit the wizard. These cores clearly didn't suit him.

Cedric sighed. "Hagrid's got all sorts of magical creatures, but I saw mostly centaur hair and eight-eyed spider legs… None of that works for wands."

For now, unicorn hair was Cedric's only viable option. As he said, though, he would only improve over time. With better materials, he'd make even better wands.

Each of them took a wand, with Fred pocketing two, one of them meant for Ron.

Cho then pulled out a stack of promotional flyers. Their little group had five members in total. The twins served as creative directors, coming up with ideas and developing magical prank toys. 

Cedric handled wand-making, creating fake wands and doing a bit of design work. Cho was head of promotions, designing flyers and networking to sell their products. With her good looks, she could sell anything. 

Meanwhile, William did nearly everything else—he was by far the most skilled in magic, so he could usually bring the twins' ideas to life. The only thing he wasn't skilled at was wand-making.

Their shop—if it could even be called a shop—was still in its infancy, essentially a lab for prototyping new products, with Hogwarts students as their primary market. William even brewed potions for sale on the black market in Diagon Alley.

Cho proudly displayed her latest ad. It was a brightly colored paper with bold yellow letters at the top:

Akali's Mystery Shop

The flyer listed all of their current products, with Hogwarts Map of Magic at the top, followed by…

The Banana Wand, Snape's Magic Wand, the Wizard's Best Friend. One wand before bed keeps three pounds off your gut. Say goodbye to constipation! No. 1 wizarding enema in all of Diagon Alley!

William was speechless. This was his first time seeing the flyer. 

With a slogan like that, Snape would definitely have their heads if he found out. There was no way Cho wrote that line.

The twins, grinning widely, shrugged.

"Don't worry, William. This is all about getting our name out there. It's fresh, funny, unforgettable! Relax—if people want it, they'll buy it. Snape can't stop us; in fact, the more he bans it, the more they'll want it!"

Fred leaned back in his seat, giving what he imagined was the stance of an advertising genius, a tactical lean so to speak.

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