"How?" Diana asked. The shock and sadness in her voice broke my heart.
I knew it was coming since the day I met her, but it did not hurt any less. If anything, my heart ached seeing what she believed in slowly crumbling to the ground. It could be one of the reasons that she did not participate in World War 2.
How could I even start with that topic?
Taking her and guiding her back onto my lap, I continued, "You see… We humans are greedy in nature. We could never have enough. We always wanted more. Like history dictated, and the records of ancient within your library, greed leads to war. And war to suffering."
"You knew this war wasn't going to end?"
"This one? No. Maybe it was my intervention, but originally the war was meant to end in a few days at most. And I will make sure it would happen that way," I said. The thought of my appearance in this war changed everything. How Ares died long before we traveled to France and destroyed the factory. Diana had yet to take up the role of a hero.
And let's not talk about the weapon of mass casualty potentially becoming a weapon. A weapon that could even harm a god.
"Was it my battle with Ares? How much damage did we cause?" Diana asked guiltily.
"You don't have to worry, no life was lost. It's wartime, so people are always prepared for evacuation. As for the building and housing that was destroyed during your battle, my donation is more than enough to cover everything."
"Thanks," Diana fell back into my arms for a brief second before bolting upright. She stared at me, eyes widened in disbelief. "This one? Do you mean there is another one?"
"Well…"
"Tell me, Xandros," Diana commanded.
Thankfully, before I could answer, Steve burst in, his face brimming with happiness. "Xandros. You are right. They fell for it."
"You give them the location?" I asked, feeling happy for a chance, as things finally going my way. No more interruption. A war ended with the public remained clueless about Diana's presence.
"I just destroyed everything related to the journal, and in their infinite anger, they are going to level the factory tonight. By tomorrow, even if Germany wanted to fight back, they won't have the weapon to do so."
"You are prolonging the war?" Diana asked in shock.
She was up and ready her Lasso to interrogate me again. Helplessly, I could only pull her back onto the couch and soothed her bubbling anger with gentle kisses.
"Will you listen to my explanation?"
"Fine," Diana said, leaning in for a final kiss. Only when her anger subsided, did she turn toward me, eyes full of expectation.
"Uhm… Do you want me to leave?" Steve asked awkwardly.
"Take a seat, Steve. You are going to be my connection in the US Army, so there are many things you need to know." Once the three of us settled down, I continued, "This is what we are trying to destroy."
At my words, I conjured up a cloud of toxins that Diana saw not long ago. Slowly, I saw recognition in her eyes. "This is what the Germans created in their quest to win the war. With its capability, the only way to stop this war is to destroy its source. A necessary sacrifice."
"A human created something like this?" Diana asked.
"You would be surprised to what extent a human is capable of doing once they had set their mind on it." I sighed at the thought of Batman. A hero and a threat wrapped into one.
"Yo-You… How are you doing that?" Steve asked tremblingly.
"The time is changing, Steve. The world is going to become more and more chaotic. It is not going to happen in your lifetime, but at some point, a world-ending threat would be another Tuesday. So, we need to prepare ourselves."
"Not in my lifetime? Then what can I do for you?"
"Oh. Don't you worry. I am coming up with a plan to extend your life. And when you get into a high enough position, you can circulate it within the government," I said.
However, instead of the support I had hoped for, what I received was skepticism. From both Steve and Diana. Just by the way they looked at me, I knew each had their concern.
Steve was doubting the mystical nature of it all, but the thought of a long life brightened his day and eased his doubt into curiosity and nervous expectation. For a mortal man, that was enough to motivate Steve. Considering in some versions he became a general, thus, he would become an excellent key for my upcoming plan.
For Diana, however, the skepticism was much harder to elevate.
"What are you planning?" Diana asked the moment Steve left the house.
"Do you really want to know?"
"Will you tell me the truth?"
"Yes. Even if you are going to hate it, I will still tell you the truth," I said.
"There you go again. Why do you think so badly of me?" Diana pushed me back onto the couch, before nestling in my arms. For a brief moment, we stayed there in a comfortable silence.
"Because you are a hero at heart, Diana," I said after building up my courage.
"And you are not?"
"No, Diana. I am greedy just like any other human."
Diana scuffed as she pinched my cheeks as if she was telling me to stop lying. The annoyance in her eyes was adorable.
"You remember what I said earlier?" I asked.
"Humans are greedy. And I doubted that. There were countless figures of the past who risked their life for what they believed in. They fought till their dying breaths for their people. They were not what you consider greedy. Even your partner, he is a righteous man," Diana said, her bright round eyes staring at me, waiting for my answer.
Staring into those bright and mesmerizing eyes, I gathered my thoughts, "My point still stands. Humans are greedy in nature. The only difference between a hero and a villain is how far they are willing to go to achieve it. Take Steve as an example. He, too, is greedy for peace. The only thing that differentiates him, and the countless dictators before him is that he had a kind heart, and they did not."
"Are you telling me you don't have a kind heart?"
"To you and those I cared for, yes. To the world, then no," I said.
"I am not going to like where this conversation is going, am I?" Diana pouted.
For a second there, my mind went blank. I had never thought I would see her pout, the misty eyes, the plucker lips, and her demanding tone made my heart melt.
"No. You are not."
"Let me hear it."
I wanted to say no. I wanted to hide my intention. But under those rosy lips, it was hard to even stay silent. Not that I wanted to. I had grown to accept that Diana was going to be my life partner, and with the plan I had for myself, that life would be a long time.
"I wanted to control the world."
"I knew it."
Upon seeing the gleam in her eyes, I nervously continued, "Can I at least explain for myself?"
"You may," Diana demanded, mimicking who I assumed was her Mother. Yet, the twinkles in her eyes told me she held no judgment. Only care and worries.
"If you are worrying that I would become a dictator, ruling everyone with an iron fist, then don't be. It's too much work, and eventually, someone is going to plan for my downfall. No. What I plan is more subtle. I am just going to control the narrative, removing the idea that heroes are bad, and or that the government could control them. And if my control is extensive enough, control the criminal, the villains so that the citizens would be spared from the endless conflicts."
"In other words, you are planning to take away their free will?"
"I will give them controlled free will."
"That does not sound any better."
Hearing Diana's stand on the matter, I knew this was going to be a long conversation, but a conversation we needed if I wanted this relationship to move further.
"Free will means all ideas, the contributional, the good, the bad, and of course, the destructive. I am eliminating the destructive ideas before they could harm society."
"Themyscira doesn't have destructive ideas." For the first time since the conversation, Diana exploded. I heard her voice trembling. The belief she had for all of her life was shattering around her. I hugged her tighter, and my hand ran along her spine, driving away her fears. "You know something don't you?"
"Unfortunately, yes."
"What?"
"Eventually, one of two going to happen at some point down the line, someone is going to usurp Hippolyta and become the Queen of Amazons, or a villain is going to rule over the Amazons," I said to an angry Diana, especially when she heard that one of her sisters could be responsible for it. "Then, you are going to defeat them, and return Themyscira to what it meant to be."
"Not just Themyscira, but Earth had its fair share of betrayal and tragedy as well. So, I would rather remove the betrayal before it ever happens," I said with the determination I did not know I had.
"And what if you are wrong? What if the person you eliminated was not going to be a threat?"
Since the idea came to me all those years ago, I never once shied away from the idea I would possibly kill an innocent man. Because how could I ever say that what I knew was the absolute truth? And time and time again, the answer was the same.
I did not.
But I could not risk it. For every million happy endings, where the superheroes came out on top, there were a million tragedies where the Earth was destroyed or conquered. Thus, how could I ever take that chance? Risk my life and the lives of those I cared for, for a maybe?
"If the peace of the world rests on a few innocent lives, then I would rather be wrong than be right."
"That is a dangerous thought to have, Xandros."
"I know, and I understand if-"
Before I could finish my thoughts, Diana's soft lips found mine. Like the countless before, and the countless later, we melted into each other embrace.
"I've decided. No matter what is going to happen, I will be there to guide you." Diana announced.
"While we are on the topic of no matter what is going to happen, can I get a vial of your blood?" I asked sheepishly. And when her smile turned into a glare, I shrank my neck even further.
"Why?"