...Prologue ....
Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I feel like a hero from a classical Greek tale. It could be Perseus, Jason, or maybe even Oedipus. It's not because I'm as strong as Heracles or smart as Odysseus. It's because, like them,
My life sucks.
Like them, I desperately tried to avoid my fate.
Tried to run away.
But destiny keeps pushing me to the same place
that evokes the memories I try to conceal.
My childhood from the hometown I remember was more vivid and vibrant. They were painted with ecstasy, the days when you were spilling with youth and freedom. They seem out of reach as the colors of adulthood begin to fade away.
I might be surrounded by people, but there will always be an ocean sitting between me and everyone else. But I don't know how to swim, nor let others cross it. I never walked down the path I chose, turning away from my hopes because I was scared.
Scared to face life, to face the truth.
From a distance, I saw a familiar figure, waving their hands and calling my name. They somehow saved me from drowning in the waters of my thoughts, but I will never tell them. As I got closer and closer, the shadows appeared to be clearer. A sparkle to the contentment of my childhood.
Friends I had abandoned but haven't abandoned me.
"How was the flight?" Elias asked with his childish tone I remember from the old days. He hasn't changed much, except for his height, size, and being a married man with a child.
I guess that's a lot of changes.
"Fine, where's the others?" I asked as I was expecting to see more.
"They're at my house. Let's get going if everything's settled."
I was glad that he didn't want to start a conversation in which I would act awkwardly. He kept in touch with me for the past couple of years when I didn't mind it if he wouldn't, but he called and messaged even if I didn't reply.
Every birthday, holiday, and Christmas.
From the airport to his house was a one-hour drive. There was an awful silence building between us before he decided to break it.
"So... got anything to say?"
I thought and tried to come up with something.
"Um... congratulations on being a father?"
"That happened a year ago," he said with a chuckle.
I knew I was an idiot for saying something like that, but don't blame a panicked person for the way they behave.
"Next month is Milly's first birthday."
"Who's?"
"Madeleine, my daughter... we call her Milly for short."
"Oh, okay." For a brief second, I thought getting struck by lightning is better than ending up in a conversation like this. "Sorry."
"You don't need to be so self-conscious like that, you know. After all, we are friends, even if you don't want it to be," he emphasized the "are" part with a firm tone. Or it must have been my imagination.
"Of course we are."
"I want—no, we want you, not the version you have become," he paused before finishing his sentence. "Carefree and careless you... not a dense and serious version of you, and that's what you need too."
"Did Adeline tell you to tell me that?" I ask because I don't know how to reply, and he turned to look at me before giving me the bright smile I remember from the memories we shared.
"Yeah, Adele did."
I was determined to not fall asleep till we arrived, but I did.
I was too exhausted to resist it.
"Don't worry, it's been a long time," Elias said when he woke me. "A lot has changed."
That's what worries me the most, I think but don't say.
His home was not that big as the others that rested beside it. He has always been a fan of vintage, and maybe that is why his house looks like it has lost to time itself as it stood out from the neighborhood with its pale color and the abundant gaze.
The dark ash that washed the gate with ravishing patterns was peeling away when he guided his car through it. The first thing that caught my eye was the bewitching lavender fields that lay in front of the cream-painted walls that saw the world through its enormous wooden windows.
From a distance, I saw a woman appear, watching us as she leaned into the door frame.
Her long dark hair that spilled over her shoulders to her knees was unforgettable.
Louisa Caroline has always been the complete opposite of her husband, Elias Osgood, even when they were in high school. Unlike him, she was quiet and calm; she didn't put much effort into being social, as she would always sit in the corner of the library with a book in her hand, whereas Elias would always be the center of attention with his charismatic and optimistic personality. Him being the basketball captain didn't do much help either.
When we found out that they were going out, everyone was surprised.
Maybe I can't say everyone because I had seen it coming from the start.
The differences between their characters have always drawn them closer.
A senior golden-haired boy with eyes colored with blue and a junior dark-haired girl with eyes soaked with brown sounded like a good match.
I took a deep breath, leaning onto my seat. Now that I was there, I could feel my heart beating a bit faster. Elias opened the door to my side of the car, offering me his hand to get out, but I didn't take it.
My grip on the suitcase became tighter as I saw Louisa walking toward our direction. She was a year younger than me, so we never got to talk much.
She was not the first sight I wanted to get after a long time, and not something I wanted to see right after I met Elias. It was not delightful to catch both of them together as I thought it would be, but then again it was not like I wanted to come back and meet them again anyway.
"Hi, Johannes," her voice was soft.
"Come on, we got rid of the last names a long time ago, luv," Elias groaned before I was going to reply.
"But what if he's not comfortable—"
"No, I'm fine," I said before she could finish her sentence. "Sorry," I mumbled with my head held down.
"Welcome back home," she said with a warm smile drawn on her face. "Oberon."