"Fuck me? Fuck you and this entire school that I didn't want to come to in the first place!"
I could hear my own rapid breathing, overshadowing the distant chatter of students. I could feel myself getting wound up like a child's toy.
Is this what he wanted? To see me burst and react to every stupid thing that left his mouth?
Well, Kingston was in luck this morning because he would get a piece of my mind.
I felt like kicking something when he didn't acknowledge me. I stood and watched as he marched over to where I hung the first poster. My mouth dropped as he ripped it from the wall and tore it in half.
I looked down at my feet, trying to hype myself up to fight back.
Fuck it!
"Are you worried about finally taking a loss?" The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them, my voice sounding strained even to my own ears.
Kingston turned, and I watched the muscles in his jaw clench. His eyes, a stormy blue, locked onto mine with an intensity that made my stomach flip.
His balled-up fists caught my attention as I reached him.
"Headmaster Smith won't allow this to happen because of your past, you know," he said in a cool tone.
"Everyone loves a comeback, Kingston. You should know that personally."
A pulsating vein appeared in the center of his forehead. Was I hitting sore spots for the quarterback? The thought gave me hope.
"I am warning you. I don't know what scheme you're planning but-"
I could smell his cologne now, a mix of cedar and citrus that made my head spin. "I don't scheme, Kingston. I fight for justice."
Suddenly, his hands were on my shoulders, and I found myself pinned against the wall. The cool surface seeped through my thin shirt, a stark contrast to the heat radiating from Kingston's body. I flinched involuntarily, and the ghost of a smile touched his lips. He enjoys this power, I realized with a jolt.
"You don't know shit about this school, and you better watch out before you discover something you won't like."
I tried to form a response, but my mouth had gone dry. His proximity was overwhelming—I could count his eyelashes, see the faint stubble on his jaw. The minty freshness of his breath washed over me, and I hated how my body reacted. My heart thundered in my chest, and a lump formed in my throat, choking any words I might have said.
"I don't want to hurt your feelings, Sasha," he continued, his voice softer now, almost intimate. "But if I have to, I will."
I swallowed hard, forcing myself to meet his gaze.
"You have no control over me. I told you when we first met back in second grade, and I'm going to tell you again. Nothing you say can ever hurt me. It will only piss me off."
Kingston's tongue darted out, moistening his lips, and I found my eyes drawn to the movement. His bottom lip had a slight dent in the center, and I had a sudden, inexplicable urge to trace it with my finger.
"So, you're not worried about the school finding out about your little TV appearance?"
Kingston words hit me like a physical blow.
I released a heavy breath and stared at him. No one knew about my past. I hadn't even told Maddy about my mother abandoning me.
I mentally shook myself, trying to focus on the danger of the situation rather than the confusing mix of fear and... something else... coursing through me.
Memories I'd tried so hard to suppress came flooding back—the harsh lights of the police station, the pitying looks, the crushing weight of abandonment. My legs felt weak, and I shifted my weight, trying to stay upright.
"And why does that need to be brought up?" I began to feel nervous and balanced out my weight on both legs.
"Whatever it takes, Sasha,"he replied, his tone filled with a quiet menace that sent chills down my spine.
The way he towered over me when he spoke made me feel inferior to him. It brought me back to that moment in elementary school when the entire school found out why I lived with my Aunt and not my mother.
Some kid in the same grade found the news video of me standing next to police officers. The title read 'Unclaimed Minor.'
My mother had left me in a Denny's restaurant when I was seven years old. I don't know where he had found the video, but the only person who knew about my past was Kingston. I had met him at the therapist's office only weeks before. If anyone had the right to hold any grudges, it would be me, not him.
I rushed past him back to my truck, over the bickering with him.
As I reached the door, I fumbled with the keys in my hands, and it dropped to the ground. Images of a faceless woman appeared before me. I had nightmares about her as a child. Those turned into panic attacks like what I could feel coursing through my veins.
I finally got the keys into the truck door and grabbed hold of the steering wheel. I looked up and saw Kingston had walked off. The pieces of my election posters floating away in the wind.
Asshole.
Kingston's words echoed in my head: Whatever it takes.
The implications of that threat loomed over me, dark and foreboding. How was I going to face the entire school finding out about my past? Again?
Fuck! Not now, not now.
I pleaded, but there was no use. My vision was becoming blurry, and I could almost taste the tears that were about to run down my face.
Whatever it takes.
What does that mean? I couldn't think of anything else dirty that he could possibly have on me.
I inhaled the soothing lavender fragrance from the car infuser. It, along with a vanilla body spray, kept the trash smell at bay.
I took a deep breath.
I am safe.
Those words had calmed me.
Dr. Singleton was the one who truly taught me what it meant and how to apply it to my situation.
And I needed it at that moment. I needed to check in with my therapist before I crumbled.
I went to my hospital's app and checked under my favorites tabs to see if Dr. Singleton was available.
I held up my phone to my face for the verification. Taking small breaths as the dotted circle went around itself. My vision became a tunnel, and the worst possible thought came to me. What if Kingston gets me kicked out? All that money my Aunt gave would be for nothing.
A black image appeared on my phone screen before Dr. Singleton's salt and peppered hair and warm smile came alive.
"Hello, Sasha. How are you feeling this morning?" His voice was choppy, and the picture became scrambled.
Shit, this had to work.
"Hey, Dr. Singleton, I'm feeling really anxious right now, and I have class in twenty minutes, but I feel like just driving and never coming back,"
I began to breathe through pursed lips. My eyes began to water. And my mind raced.
Why was this happening to me?
"Sasha, listen to my voice. Can you focus on my voice for a second? Just listen to me,"
I blinked several times and then lifted the phone back to my face. I didn't realize I had lowered it.
"So tell me, what do you see to your right?"
My brows shot right up. What was to my right?
I turned and saw the last two posters that I wanted to hang inside the cafeteria. Maddy had the rest. Between us, we had enough that everyone in school would know we were running for President and Vice President. She was coming in late because the portable chargers with our campaign photos and other election swag were being delivered, and she wanted to hand them out before the day was through.
I looked back at Dr. Singleton, "My posters for the election. Maddy and I are running for the senior class council."
His eyes widened at the news. "I didn't know that was an interest of yours, Sasha. What made you decide to take this on?"
"It's a long story, but I think I'm calming down now,"
"That's great to hear, Sasha, but if you are going to request an emergency appointment. We are going to find out why. Part of our agreement."
I exhaled. I'd hoped he had forgotten.
"Well, I may as well be honest with you. Kingston got me in trouble again. Headmaster Smith is on my ass. Maddy needs a better VP than fucking Allen, and I want to cancel Football. No. I want to control everything Kingston thinks he can use because of his family's money."
I had finally said it aloud.
I looked at the phone, waiting for Dr. Singleton to speak. Some students were walking alongside the sidewalk to my car. He had to make this quick.
"Are you talking about Kingston Blake?"
I growled lightly.
"Yes."
"Did he say or do anything to you before your panic attack?"
Dr. Singleton was good. He was able to weave through everything I said and switch words around. He was another one that confused the hell out of me.
"Whatever it takes-"
"Sasha, I didn't hear you. Did Kingston say or do anything to you before you requested an emergency appointment?"
"Whatever it takes."
I made sure to speak it slowly that time. More people were beginning to show up around me. I didn't have time to hang the rest of the posters.
"I'm going to be late for class. Can we talk about this next time?"
"Of course, we can. Thank you for sharing with me this morning. Sasha, I would like to continue this conversation soon. I will tell Amy to call you after school to make a follow-up appointment."
"That sounds good. I have a bunch of things to tell you."
He smiled kindly, "Have a good day, Sasha. Goodbye."
The call disconnected, and I was left staring at my face.
Fucking Kingston knew the right buttons to push.
Why did he do this to me? Why did I let his words affect me so much?
I reached down in my console unit and found a shimmering lip gloss. I reapplied a generous amount to my lips then gave it a couple of smacks.
Kingston was not going to ruin my day.
I grabbed the rest of the posters and my purse. As I locked the car door, I heard my name being called and saw Maddy waving at me.
I jogged over to her, and we began walking towards class.
"What happened with the delivery?"
She sighed, "It got delayed. I don't know why I paid extra for shipping when I knew this would happen."
She looked stressed with the election, no matter how much I offered to help.
"Ah, ok, at least we'll have them before the debate?
She nodded, "Yeah, I hope so,"
"So I ran into our opponent this morning,"
Her eyes widened. We hadn't told anyone besides Allen about the campaign switch, and I knew she wanted to see the Kings' reaction to it.
"You saw Kingston? Shit, I was hoping to be the one to tell him to his face. How'd he take it? Were the others around?"
Gosh, I loved Maddy and all the energy that she came with.
"You know how he is. He balled up his fists and started to walk away."
Maddy laughed as we approached Stanley Hall for our English class.