"Ren, we'll help you break through! If it's you, there's still a chance!"
"Ren, take the intel to Lady Tsunade!"
"Ren, you must survive!"
"Ren!"
"Ren…"
---------------------------------------------------------
"Ah!"
Ren jolted awake, a terrified shout escaping his lips as he shot up in bed. His eyes were wide, his chest heaving with rapid breaths.
The room was silent, with only the faint light of dawn coming through the window and the ticking of a clock.
"Ren?" came a soft voice beside him as Kurenai, awakened by his outburst, sat up and placed a comforting hand on his back. "Did you have a nightmare?"
She stroked his back gently. "You're soaked with sweat."
Just a dream...
Ren lowered his head, resting it in his hands, remnants of fear still lingering in his eyes.
It's been so long since I've had a nightmare…
Shan, Haruka...
Ren closed his eyes, inhaling deeply before exhaling. He looked over at Kurenai, his voice calm. "Want breakfast?"
She looked at him with concern, nodding. "Sure."
Ren got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. Kurenai, meanwhile, opened the window to let in the morning air.
"Are you making breakfast?" she asked.
"Mm," came his quiet reply from the bathroom.
Left alone, Kurenai sat on the edge of the bed, an unfamiliar feeling of gratitude filling her heart.
Maybe this is his own way of being gentle.
She let herself relish the thought.
Finished washing up, Ren emerged and made his way to the kitchen. He grabbed eggs, vegetables, bacon, and bread, then set to work.
Kurenai, watching him prepare breakfast, found the sight oddly novel. Something about him cooking seemed out of place but endearing.
"Not going to wash up?" Ren asked, casting a glance her way.
"Oh, right." She hurried into the bathroom.
"There's a new toothbrush in the drawer below the sink," he added.
At the sink, Kurenai caught her own reflection. Her long black hair was a bit tousled, her face still marked by sleep, and her lips slightly swollen.
She touched her lips, lightly pressing them together. It wasn't that Ren had been rough—she had been the one to take the lead last night.
Then she noticed two toothbrushes on the sink, one black, presumably Ren's, and another… pink.
"…Ren?"
"Mm?"
"This pink toothbrush… whose is it?"
"It's Tenten's. She used to stay over sometimes when she was younger, and I never got around to throwing it out." His voice came from the kitchen, matter-of-fact and calm.
Tenten used to stay here?
Kurenai found herself a bit taken aback. Just how close were they?
But she shrugged it off, recalling the sweet little girl from yesterday. The toothbrush was clearly for a child; now that Tenten was older, there'd naturally be boundaries.
Maybe I could start keeping some of my own things here…
A warm thought flickered across her mind, and she imagined placing a few personal items at his place, just as she'd prepare some things for him at her home.
When Kurenai finished and returned, Ren had already plated their food: two sandwiches on separate dishes.
"Tomato sauce or salad dressing?" he asked, holding up a bottle of each.
"Salad dressing."
He squeezed the dressing onto her sandwich and handed it to her along with a glass of milk.
She glanced over at him as he bit into his own tomato-sauced sandwich.
"Thanks for the meal."
"Mmm, it's delicious!"
But even her praise didn't bring any noticeable change to his expression, leaving Kurenai feeling a little helpless.
If only Ren weren't so closed-off, she thought, it would be easier to read him.
Yet, despite his quiet nature, she felt incredibly lucky that he'd made her breakfast and even asked her about her preferences.
"Where are you meeting your students today?" she asked, sipping her milk.
"Training Field One."
"I'll be at Training Field Two," Kurenai said, glancing at the clock. "I think my students will do fine based on their grades and background."
"Coming from good families helps," Ren replied evenly.
After breakfast, Ren got dressed, fastening his forehead protector.
"You're leaving so early?" Kurenai checked the time, noting it wasn't even seven yet.
"I have other things to do."
He left with those words, heading for the door.
Kurenai watched him go, a slight pout on her face. "You could have at least said goodbye with a kiss…"
Once he'd gone, she washed the dishes, tidied up the kitchen, and then took her time carefully cleaning and arranging the room. When she was done, she looked around with satisfaction, feeling like she was slowly becoming part of his life here.
If only the place were a bit bigger.
Leaving the house, Ren found himself crossing paths with Tenten, who was just coming out of her house.
"Good morning, Ren!" she greeted cheerfully.
"Morning."
"Are you headed out early for something, Ren?" Tenten glanced past him, feeling a weight lift in her heart.
See? There's no way Ren would have a girlfriend…
"Mm," he replied without stopping.
"I have to meet my team too! See you later, Ren." Without further questions, she waved and jogged off, while Ren headed in the opposite direction, not toward the training fields.
….
At the Memorial Stone.
Ren found Kakashi already there, standing solemnly before the stone's polished surface.
"Here to see an old friend?" Kakashi's voice drifted out quietly, his back still turned, as if he already knew Ren was there.
"Mm." Ren's response was equally quiet.
A long silence settled over them.
"Do you come here every day, Kakashi?" Ren asked, studying the Jounin's back.
"…Sometimes I skip a day or two," he murmured.
So, in other words… every day.
Ren fell silent, then spoke again, "Coming here every day—does it ease your guilt?"
"Guilt isn't something you can erase just by coming here," Kakashi replied, his tone measured. "It's like a demon; the more you try to escape it, the closer it clings to you."
"I see…" Ren took a few steps forward, standing slightly behind Kakashi's shoulder.
"Have you ever been betrayed?" he asked.
Kakashi's head turned slightly, clearly startled.
"I used to believe… that I could be redeemed," Ren said quietly, his gaze fixed on the names etched into the stone.
"…"
"But maybe… I've just killed too many people."
"Now… I feel like I'm just walking toward the punishment I deserve."
Kakashi was at a loss for words, watching Ren's calm yet haunted expression as he stared at the carved names.
"These people here… they're so lucky. They don't have to feel regret…"
"Or guilt."
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