The Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, though not particularly large, is a modest-sized establishment. Most of its staff spends significant time traveling, dedicated to funerary services and preventing supernatural events from intruding into the mortal realm.
Do not assume that Wangsheng Funeral Parlor monopolizes Liyue's burial affairs or that it's akin to a government-run mortuary. In ancient times, not long after the gods had retreated from the world, leaving humans to fend for themselves, the predecessors of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor often bore the responsibilities of doctors, scientists, and pioneers.
Nowadays, with peace prevailing and the average standard of living on the rise, Wangsheng Parlor has made an effort to share its knowledge rather than hoarding it.
Thanks to abundant scholarly resources and practical experience, Liyue's medical advancements are so far ahead that neighboring countries can only drool with envy.
As for Hydro Vision users, compared to the vast population, healing diseases still relies on ordinary people's efforts—unless a god intervenes.
Of course, there are always outliers like the infamous guy who, being unable to afford bandages, developed his Vision powers into healing.
Gu Sanqiu's mind wandered with these random thoughts as he mercilessly "slaughtered" the ingredients on the cutting board.
The knife and chopping board were certainly of high quality—no doubt about it. Gu Sanqiu even felt that if the Millelith had this knife, it would serve as a more than capable weapon—if someone could wield it properly, of course.
Flashes of tangible blade light cut through the air, but none left unnecessary marks on the chopping board. His control over the knife was flawless.
Next to him, a pot bubbled, and the physical prowess of a Vision holder was evident. Sanqiu had single-handedly taken over the kitchen without showing any sign of strain or haste.
"Yes, rationally speaking, this is indeed the most efficient way to do things."
Gu Sanqiu's face stiffened. His knife slammed into the chopping board, but he quickly controlled the strength, his muscles tensing to stop the impact.
Turning, he saw a young man dressed in fine attire, golden eyes fixed earnestly on the kitchen activities.
Of course, if Gu Sanqiu ignored the seven or eight white strips stuck to the man's face, the scene might've appeared more dignified.
"My apologies, if you're hungry, the meal will be ready shortly. May I ask who you are?"
Suppressing the excitement in his heart, Gu Sanqiu engaged in a formal conversation, his "professional adult persona" on full display.
The Geo Archon! The ultimate elder, admired by all! My idol!
Zhongli!
"I am Wangsheng Parlor's guest consultant. My name is Zhongli."
Zhongli gave a polite nod. "I came here primarily to ask when the meal will be ready."
Forcing himself to ignore the strips of paper on Zhongli's face, Gu Sanqiu put on a curious expression.
"Is Zhongli guest consultant returning from a trip? If you're too hungry, I could prepare something simple right away."
"No, I was out on official business, but I am not starving," Zhongli shook his head. "Earlier, I participated in a game of 'Fight the Landlord' with the parlor's director and Miss Keqing. I lost a few rounds unexpectedly."
"The director is now persuading Miss Keqing to switch from sticking strips to drawing on faces."
Zhongli's golden eyes focused on Gu Sanqiu. "Logically speaking, once the meal is served, the game will end. That is why I came to inquire."
...
Gu Sanqiu's expression turned blank. "Understood. The meal will be ready soon. Please wait a moment."
"Oh, Zhongli, here you are!"
Hu Tao peeked in, grabbed Zhongli by the arm, and started pulling him away. "Come on, I've already planned what to draw on your face. Running away will only make people look down on you~"
٩(๑>◡<๑)۶
Gu Sanqiu silently placed his right hand over his heart as Zhongli glanced at him before being dragged away. Gu Sanqiu fully understood why Zhongli had given him that look.
"Rest assured, Geo Archon. I, a Fengxiang Clan descendant, will protect your handsome visage!"
In his mind, Gu Sanqiu repeated a list of noble and righteous phrases, but if anyone had been watching him at that moment, they would've noticed that he had his mouth open in silent laughter, his eyes crinkling with glee.
He was laughing—no, he was cackling!
(≖ᴗ≖)✧
"Geo Archon, I never thought you'd see this day."
Hahaha!
Gu Sanqiu merrily continued cooking. Being in a good mood did speed things up, but he purposefully kept his pace the same as before.
"Now, will Hu Tao draw a turtle on his face? Or perhaps a flower, or maybe even six cat whiskers?"
Gu Sanqiu sighed regretfully. It was a shame, really. After all, the Geo Archon himself had come seeking help from him. He couldn't just add to Zhongli's suffering.
Had he participated in the game, he could've devised even more outrageous punishments—like making Zhongli dance or asking about the secret to his well-toned physique.
Of course, imagining such punishments was one thing. Whether he'd be struck down by Zhongli's powers afterward was another matter entirely.
"Well, maybe I'll go enjoy the fun after all."
Gu Sanqiu cheerfully carried the dishes out, balancing several trays at once as if performing a circus act.
"Alright, everyone, dinner's ready! Today's menu is—"
Gu Sanqiu was about to announce the dishes when he turned around and froze.
Zhongli's face remained as spotless as jade, while Keqing and Hu Tao's faces were covered in black markings that made it hard for Gu Sanqiu to even look at them directly.
"What happened to you two? Lost that badly?"
Hu Tao's face had two birds perched on branches, happily singing, while Keqing's face displayed a meticulously drawn sailing ship on the water.
Seeing such lifelike drawings on their faces, Gu Sanqiu could only think: Zhongli, you're still the master. That level of skill is beyond ordinary folks.
Glancing at Zhongli sipping tea elegantly, Gu Sanqiu's expression twitched slightly.
Also… what happened with you two? Weren't you planning to prank Zhongli?
How did you end up getting pranked yourselves!?
Fengxiang Clan Confusion. JPG
"Oooh! Dinner time!"
ヾ(@^▽^@)ノ
Hu Tao cheered, tossed her cards onto the table, and skipped over to Gu Sanqiu's side.
"Sanqiu, Sanqiu, what's for dinner today?"
"We'll talk about that later. First, let's clean up your faces."
A rock-element blade appeared in Gu Sanqiu's hand. "It won't hurt, and it won't damage your skin. Just sit still."
"No," Zhongli's calm voice interrupted.
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