The sky seemed gloomy as Rebecca took a glance at it. She sat at the waiting shed of a bus station for almost thirty minutes now, processing everything that Dr. Perez told her.
'Is there really someone up there?'
She sighed, a heavy one.
'If yes, why is my life nothing but misfortunes? I thought I was finally starting again, or at least fighting back those mvtherfvckers even just by scratching them.
But why? Why is everything nothing but vain?!
Whatever I do will always be worthless!
In Rebecca's eyes, everything seems to be moving so fast—the people and vehicles that are passing by, the breeze, the trees that are swaying from it, and the flow of time—but for her, it felt just like a few seconds had passed.
Why's she the only one stuck? Unable to move at all, just there, sitting alone, while everyone is moving forward, she's just there, watching them with her blurry eyes.
She cried silently in that small corner space.
Her tears just won't stop coming.
Why are you allowing this?
Are you really there?
Can you really hear my prayer?
Why do I have to get this sickness...
Why? Just why..
She blankly stared at the sky and rested her head at the side of the transparent shed. For a second, Rebecca wants to just forget everything and just give in to this war she's fighting alone.
I'm tired..
Maybe it's better if she just gives up and lets things happen.
She's tired physically and emotionally. The situation is draining her, consuming everything she has.
Rebecca just wants to rest.
She stayed like that for a few more minutes.
And while in her deep thoughts, a sudden vibrate from her phone caught her attention.
* 1 Message from Husband <3
'I'll be late. Just order first.'
Because a lot of things happened and the sudden sharp pain she felt in her stomach a while ago, she hurriedly went to the hospital; she forgot the meeting she had with her ex-husband.
It's already two forty, and she's still two stops away from the cafe, at least thirty to fifty minutes from riding a bus.
* 1 Message from Husband <3
'Why are you not responding? I'll need to talk to you. It's important.' She stared at the screen of her phone; she felt something that she couldn't explain, and before she could even respond, another message came through.
'Are you okay?'
With just those three words, her heart started to race again, like each time that Winston acted as her husband. Someone she can lean to.
Maybe there is a chance?
Maybe if you knew my situation, we could at least fix our relationship?
A hopeful thought crosses her mind.
She wiped her tears away and immediately ran to the roadside; as soon as the cab stopped, she hopped in and didn't waste any second. She ordered the driver to drive as fast as he could.
I know I said that I would move on from you, but a decade of loving you is not that easy to forget.
And I know I'm being really pathetic right now, and I'm squeezing the very bit of pride left in me.
But I want to spend the rest of my life with you since I might die, Winston.
I want to be with you until my last breath.
If this actually really happened, could we at least pretend for our children? Even for a few years.
For the last time, I would like to fix us.
In contrast to her unwavering feelings for Winston is the sudden pouring rain, but Rebecca doesn't care at all; she still would like to meet Winston and tell him her feelings.
Since she forgot her umbrella, she used her bag to cover at least her head; she immediately took cover at the building next to the coffee shop. Fortunately, she only got herself a little wet.
She took a glance from her watch; it's 3 o'clock. She's on time. She hurriedly walked to the cafe, and as soon as she got inside, she ordered a hot chocolate and a few croissants to satisfy her hunger and cold.
After a few minutes, she had already finished her food and was feeling much better.
She stared at the pouring rain, and a sudden flash of her memories with Winston crossed her mind.
It was ten years ago, somewhere in her hometown, that it was her third meeting with Winston, and her first kiss happened. Although Winston was just drunk and don't remember at all. Rebecca still kept this memory with him as one of the precious ones.
That kiss felt the smell of earth, a gentle breeze, and roses.
It leaves a tingling feeling as if she was ecstatic at that time.
A few seconds passed, then another fifteen minutes had passed. Rebecca seems restless now; she knows that Winston will be late but it's already 3:35 PM.
She pulled out her phone from her brown sling bag and checked if there was any message from Winston, but there is none.
Maybe he's on his way now; I should be patient.
Without a single doubt for him, Rebecca sat there patiently waiting for Winston to come, not minding the number of people that were coming in and coming out of the coffee shop.
After one hour, she ordered her third coffee for the day. The waitress awkwardly smiled to her as she put down her iced Americano-flavored coffee.
She pulled out her phone again and still no message from Winston. This time she sent him a message.
'Where are you now?'
She tried not to nag him—what he called before when she was asking an update—and waited for hours before sending a message.
She anxiously put down her phone and took a few sips from her coffee. After a few minutes, Winston finally replied to her.
'I'm on my way.'
She felt a sense of relief.
Winston might really never have loved her, but at least she knows that for the past seven years of their marriage, he cared for her in his own way. Although you can only count it with just one hand, what matters for Rebecca is his intentions; Winston cared for her and their children.
Or what she taught.
Seconds turn into minutes, and minutes turn into hours, and there is still no Winston.
"Ma'am, we are closing now. Do you want me to call you a cab? It's past 9 PM." The brunette waitress came again to her tables as she is the only one left inside the coffee shop and the other crews are throwing daggers in their eyes.
The coffee shop closes at 8 PM; they already finished cleaning the shop and waited for her to get up thirty minutes ago.
The only person who messaged her a while ago was Eve, asking her to buy some vodka and get home safe.
"It's okay, and I'm sorry for keeping you all this late. I should go now." Rebecca got up and walked out of the coffee shop, and as she mindlessly walked the street, a familiar voice called her.
It was Winston in his black suit. He still looks the same; with his long comb over with a low fade hair style, deep brown eyes, and a sharp jawline, he still makes Rebecca's heart skip a beat.
"Rebecca, the meeting took long more than I expected." He seems out of breath while explaining what happened.
Did he run to catch up with me?
"Did you wait for me?" he says while closing the gap between them.
Rebecca needed to look up high to match his gaze, thanks to his athlete-built body and height.
"N-not really." She shyly answered him.
"I told you, Rebecca won't wait for six hours there, silly," Winston's eyes divert from her to her back. Another familiar voice made her turn and see to confirm it with her own eyes.
"How have you been, Rebecca? It's nice seeing you again." She is the very last person that Rebecca would like to see right now.
The woman standing before her is Winston's first love and ex-girlfriend.
"Ara..." she mumbled to herself.