I should've known better.
In fact, I do know better.
But somehow, I keep making the same mistake over and over again—thinking that maybe this time, just this once, it'll be different.
Maybe, if the Date Extermination Squad (DES) is busy, or if I pick a guy who isn't on their radar, I'll actually get to have a normal, uninterrupted date.
Except, today, I made a critical miscalculation.
I underestimated Theo.
Now, don't get me wrong. Theo isn't like my other brothers—Marcus, Julian, and Dante. They're proactive. They hunt my dates down and scare them off. But Theo? He doesn't actively try to sabotage my love life.
He's just so… Theo. Quiet. Serious. Analytical.
He could make a casual conversation feel like a final exam on the human condition, and my poor dates have no idea what they're in for.
I thought today would be different.
Andrew was perfect. Sensitive, smart, and a part-time model—he checked all the boxes. He also happened to be the son of two famous celebrities, which made him used to the public eye. And let's be honest, having some Hollywood genes didn't hurt either.
But what I loved most about him was his kindness. He volunteered at animal shelters and had a soft spot for stray dogs. That kind of guy wouldn't be scared off easily, right?
Wrong.
I was upstairs, putting the finishing touches on my outfit, when I heard Theo come home. The sound of the front door closing and his calm footsteps crossing the marble floors instantly made me tense.
But I tried to reassure myself. Theo wouldn't care, I told myself. He didn't care about my dates the way the others did. If anything, he was indifferent.
All I had to do was introduce him to Andrew, get his vague, silent approval, and we'd be off to the movies.
How hard could that be?
I gave the maids strict instructions to seat Andrew in the living room while I finished getting ready. He was punctual, as always.
I could hear his polite conversation with the staff downstairs as I fiddled with my earrings, making sure they matched my dress.
I checked my reflection one last time—perfect. My outfit was on point, and my hair fell in soft waves over my shoulders. This was going to be a great night. I was determined.
Then I heard Theo's voice from downstairs. Low, calm, and with that clinical detachment that made even casual remarks sound like they were backed by years of medical study. My stomach flipped.
No, I told myself. Don't panic. Theo isn't Marcus. He doesn't meddle in my love life. He's just saying hello.
But then I heard Andrew's voice, hesitant and nervous, responding to whatever Theo had just said. I couldn't make out the words, but it didn't sound good.
Stay calm, Xandria, I told myself, rushing down the stairs. Everything's fine.
I rounded the corner into the living room and saw them—Theo, sitting casually on the leather armchair, his hands folded in his lap, and Andrew, sitting awkwardly on the edge of the couch, looking like he was about to bolt out the door at any second. His smile was tight, and his eyes darted toward me like a man begging for rescue.
"Theo?" I asked, stepping into the room and forcing a bright smile. "What's going on?"
Theo glanced up at me, his expression as neutral as ever. "Just having a conversation."
Andrew shot me a panicked look, his smile wavering. "Yeah… a conversation."
I blinked. Oh no. Oh no, no, no.
Theo leaned back, looking at Andrew with that same assessing gaze he probably used in the operating room. "I was just suggesting Andrew get his jaw checked out."
Andrew's hand flew to his face. "My… jaw?"
I shot Theo a death glare. "His jaw?"
Theo nodded, completely unfazed. "It's slightly asymmetrical. Could be genetic, but it might also be the result of an old injury. He should get it evaluated before it leads to a more serious condition. Temporomandibular joint disorder, for instance."
Andrew blinked rapidly, clearly trying to process the torrent of medical jargon Theo had just unleashed on him. "Is that… is that dangerous?"
Theo tilted his head slightly, as if contemplating the severity. "Only if you enjoy chewing. Left untreated, it could become quite painful."
Andrew's hand dropped from his face, and I could see the color drain from his cheeks. "Chewing?"
I stepped forward, trying to save what little was left of this date. "Theo, I'm sure Andrew's fine."
But Theo, ever the doctor, continued in his usual calm tone. "I'm just looking out for his long-term health. It's important to identify potential issues early on."
Andrew swallowed hard, his hand now awkwardly clutching the arm of the couch like it was his lifeline. "Uh, maybe I should… get going. Just in case. You know, I've got a long day tomorrow."
I blinked at him, horrified. "What? But we were going to see that new movie—"
"Another time, maybe?" he interrupted, already standing up and grabbing his coat. "I should, uh… really get this checked out."
Theo gave him a polite nod. "Smart decision. Early diagnosis is key."
I stood there, speechless, as Andrew all but ran out of the living room, muttering something about making an appointment with his doctor.
I barely had time to say goodbye before the front door closed behind him, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open in disbelief.
I slowly turned to Theo, who was casually standing up and smoothing out his sweater like he hadn't just completely torpedoed my date.
"What the hell, Theo?" I demanded, hands on my hips.
He blinked at me, completely unfazed. "What?"
"You scared him off!" I threw my hands up in the air. "You and your—your medical assessments!"
Theo frowned slightly. "I didn't scare him off. I was helping him. He had a visible asymmetry in his jaw that could indicate—"
"I don't care about his jaw!" I shouted, exasperated. "I care that you practically convinced him he's about to lose the ability to chew!"
Theo stared at me blankly for a moment, then shrugged. "Well, it's better that he knows now. Prevention is better than cure."
I groaned, dropping onto the couch in defeat. "I can't believe this. I actually thought, for once, that I'd have a date that wasn't ruined by one of my brothers."
Theo sat down across from me, folding his hands in his lap again. "I didn't ruin your date, Xandria. I just pointed out a potential health issue."
I shot him a look. "Theo, you terrified him."
He raised an eyebrow. "If he's that easily terrified, then maybe he's not the right person for you."
I stared at him, incredulous. "That's not the point!"
Theo tilted his head, considering me for a moment. "You know, Xandria, I don't actively oppose your dating life. But if you're going to be with someone, they should at least be able to handle a little straightforward conversation."
I threw a pillow at him. He caught it easily, without so much as flinching.
"A little straightforward conversation?" I echoed, my voice dripping with sarcasm. "Theo, you gave him a medical diagnosis in the first five minutes of meeting him!"
Theo shrugged, unfazed. "I'm a medical professional. It's instinct."
I let out a long, frustrated sigh, dropping my face into my hands. "Why do you guys do this to me?"
Theo didn't answer immediately. Instead, he leaned forward slightly, his voice softening just a fraction. "It's not about doing anything to you, Xandria. We just… care. Maybe in our own weird ways, but we do."
I peeked at him through my fingers, feeling my anger deflate a little. He wasn't wrong. Theo wasn't like the others. He wasn't trying to scare off my dates. He just couldn't help himself. He cared too much, in that quiet, intense way of his.
I groaned again, though this time it was more out of frustration than anger. "You guys are impossible."
Theo stood up, heading toward the door. "You'll figure it out. Eventually."
I glared at his back as he left the room, muttering under my breath. "If I don't die single first."
But as the door closed behind him, I couldn't help but wonder if maybe Theo had a point. If someone couldn't handle my brothers—couldn't handle me—then maybe they weren't the right person after all.
Still, that didn't make it any less infuriating.