"Remember when you get up on that stage, you're a whole different person."
"A whole different person?" I asked, using my hand to cover up the exposed parts of my body. It was really hard to do that considering the fact that I was only wearing a thong and a black lace bra.
"Yes Zoe, why do you have to ask this every time? You know what I mean. The men are paying good money for your body. Treat them well, it's the least you can do. Now stop being such an airhead and get up there."
I swallowed and stared down at myself. My tits were so large they spilled out over both sides of my bra. I looked like I had implants, which is something I always hated about myself.
"It's just that…." I stammered.
"I don't feel so confident about myself. I mean, I can't even dance and…and…well, I'm not sure if I should go through with this. What do you think, Marge? Do you think it would be better for me to just quit?"
Marge laughed and shook her head. Her blonde hair bounced around as she did so. She reached out and pulled me away from the mirror.
"Zoe honey! Quit and do what? Go back to scrubbing the floors of the diner? No way. Look at yourself. Those are some huge titties right there. Now remember your moves and let's get the show started."
Marge grabbed my left arm and gently pushed me towards the door. I couldn't help but glance over my shoulder at the mirror again.
I saw a girl who was insecure and unsure of herself. I had always struggled with my confidence.
My self esteem issues ran deep. Maybe I could change that tonight and maybe I could find the strength I needed to go through with things. I took a deep breath and walked outside.
The strip club was packed with people. White smoke lingered in the air, giving the place an eerie atmosphere. The walls were adorned with neon lights and posters of scantily clad women, advertising the dancers who were scheduled to perform that night. My picture was among those on display. I could see my face staring back at me from behind the glass, lit by the red light.
Horny men filled the room, most sitting in their seats, waiting for the next dancer—me to make her grand entrance. They had paid good money to watch me shake my ass on stage. I felt sick. I had never done anything like this before.
I had only been doing this work for about a week and I already felt like I wanted to throw up. But I couldn't stop.
From my vegetative mother's medical bills to my everlasting debts; I needed this job. It was the only way I could survive.
"Zoe!!!" Lily, a fellow dancer, called out to me. She walked towards the bar, where Marge and I stood waiting to be called upon.
Lily was one of the few dancers I liked in the club. The others were mean ass bitches who only cared about themselves. When I first started working here, I would get these strange looks from them, and I wasn't sure why. They all knew I was new to the profession and didn't have much experience to begin with. However, they didn't seem to care that I was inexperienced. They still treated me like shit and I hated every moment of it.
"Ready to give those boys what they paid for?" she asked.
"Ummmm….. I don't…" I stammered.
"She's still having doubts and wants to quit." Marge interrupted. She grabbed a glass of whiskey from the bartender and handed it to me.
Lily rolled her eyes. "Just calm down Zoe. You can do this. Remember what we practiced. Just pretend you're dancing in front of your own mirror."
"But I'm not good at dancing and I feel like naked." I replied.
"Naked." Lily chuckled. "You're not naked. You're wearing a thong and a bra. Have you seen the girls that work in the VIP section? They hardly wear any clothes at all. Hell, some of them even wear nothing at all. If you can handle being around them, then you can handle stripping naked for men. Come on now, you got this."
I took the glass of whiskey and gulped it down. It burned as it went down my throat. It felt like fire burning through my veins.
"But—" I tried to speak but Marge grabbed my arm and pushed me towards the stage.
The announcer or as we called him, Brad the MC, stood up on his podium and began to introduce me as the next performer. His words echoed in my ears. My heart began to beat faster and I felt myself getting nervous.
"...And coming up next, we have our newest addition to the club. She comes all the way from North Dakota and she is going to be bringing us some dirty dancing. Ladies and gentleman, please welcome 'Raven'. "
My hands were shaking as I stepped onto the stage. I glanced up at the crowd and immediately regretted it. There were so many of them. All I could see were dozens of faces staring back at me, filled with lust and desire.
"I feel like crying," I whispered to myself. I twirled my finger around my raven black hair. It was my trademark look and it was also the reason I was given 'Raven' as my stage name.
The music started and I froze. I knew I wasn't going to be able to do this. I didn't want to embarrass myself. Maybe this was a bad idea.
"Come on shake that ass." A man in the crowd yelled.
"And those huge titties too!!!" Someone else shouted.
"We didn't pay for you to stand there," Another voice added.
I swallowed. These men were really horny.
I began moving my hips slowly or so I thought. To get in rhythm, I started to sway my body back and forth.
There was a pole in the middle of the stage and I moved towards it. I grabbed the metal bar with both hands and proceeded to move my body around it.
I can't believe I am actually doing this, I thought. I hoped I was putting on a good show for these men.
Suddenly, I felt a hand grab my ass. It startled me and I almost fell off the stage.
I glanced over my shoulder and saw one of the guys sitting at the table. He was staring at me with his mouth wide open. His friend next to him was laughing.
"What??!!!" He yelled. "Don't you like it?"
He began to laugh again and so did the others.
"You're so boring!!!" A bald headed man yelled.
"Give me my money back. This isn't worth a dime." Another guy complained.
I looked at the girls in the audience. Their faces were full of disappointment and disapproval. I felt crushed under their gaze.
"And that's all for Raven." Brad quickly jumped onto the stage. He handed me a few dollars and gestured for me to leave.
Boos erupted into the air as I left the stage. The sound of disappointed men filled the room.
I sat down next to Marge at the bar. Tears began to fall from my eyes. I had failed. Everyone was right; I couldn't dance for shit.
"It wasn't that bad." Marge spoke, trying to console me.
"That was terrible." A woman chimed in from across the bar.
Her name was Ramona and she was the manager of the club. She was a tall slender brunette with long dark curly hair. She always wore excessive makeup for some reason and her skin was extremely pale.
"I've seen hundreds of new strippers before you and none of them were as bad as you."
I wiped away a tear and looked into her eyes. She had a stern look about her. Her face was covered in freckles and she seemed to be quite old.
"One more bad show Raven and I'm kicking you out." Ramona warned.
I nodded my head, afraid to say anything.
"I know what you can do to help your situation." Marge said.
"Huh?" I asked, confused.
Marge pulled me up off the stool. She led me back to the dressing room at the far end of the club.
"First of all, you have to swear that you won't tell a single soul what I am about to tell you as not many dancers in the club know about this." She whispered.
I nodded my head.
"Good. There is this man. We call him Master."
"Master?" I asked.
"Yes, Master. I know the name sounds strange but we call him Master because he helps girls like you. You know girls with no experience in the business. He teaches them how to dance and he makes sure they are safe. He doesn't just teach them but also gives them pointers on how to handle themselves in the business."
"How does he do that?" I asked, eager to know more.
"Well, when you see him. You can ask him." She said and handed me a black business card.
I took a quick glance at the card. There wasn't much information. Just the name—Master and an address.
But what caught my eye was what was written at the bottom of the card.
'Meeting with me will be an experience beyond your wildest dreams.'
The words sent shivers down my spine. And somehow made me wet.