Chereads / Glimmer & Stardust / Chapter 18 - Chapter 18: Wrestling with Emotions

Chapter 18 - Chapter 18: Wrestling with Emotions

After a long, emotionally charged day on set, Roxie was exhausted, physically, mentally, and emotionally. The scenes with Victor had left her drained, and the unshakable tension between them continued to linger in her thoughts. By the time she got home, all she wanted was a quiet moment to process everything. But instead, her mind was racing.

Sitting on her couch, still in her casual clothes, Roxie stared at her phone. She wanted to talk to someone, to unload all the complicated emotions swirling inside her. Her thumb hovered over Ryan's contact, but she hesitated. He'd warned her about Victor already, and part of her didn't want to admit just how confusing things had gotten. She needed someone who could offer advice without judgment.

Scrolling through her contacts, she found Janie's name. Her coworker from the diner had always been the grounded, no-nonsense voice of reason in Roxie's life. Janie didn't sugarcoat things, but she also didn't make Roxie feel bad for getting caught up in her emotions.

With a deep breath, Roxie hit the call button and waited for Janie to pick up.

"Hey, girl!" Janie's bright voice answered after a few rings. "What's up? Haven't heard from you in a few days. How's the glamorous Hollywood life treating you?"

Roxie smiled at the warmth in her friend's tone. "It's... a lot," she admitted, sinking back into the couch. "I've been filming every day, and things have gotten pretty intense."

"Intense? Like good intense or bad intense?" Janie asked, her curiosity piqued.

"Both, I guess," Roxie replied, her voice unsure. She sighed, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers as she searched for the right words. "I got bumped up to the lead role. That other actress, Melanie, had a meltdown and walked off set, so now I'm officially the romantic lead."

"Wait, seriously?!" Janie's voice was filled with excitement. "That's amazing, Roxie! Why didn't you call me sooner?"

Roxie chuckled softly. "I know, I know. It's just... everything's happening so fast, you know? One minute I'm filling in, and now I'm the star of the movie."

"Girl, this is what you've been working for," Janie said firmly. "You should be celebrating! You've made it!"

"I guess," Roxie murmured, her mind drifting back to the scenes with Victor. "It's just... complicated."

"Complicated how?" Janie pressed. "Is it the role? The crew? What's going on?"

Roxie hesitated for a moment before finally letting the words spill out. "It's Victor. We've been filming these really intense scenes together, and... I don't know. There's this chemistry between us that feels so real, and it's confusing. Like, I can't tell if it's just acting or if there's something more."

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line before Janie spoke again, her tone cautious. "Victor Crane? The guy you've been working with? He's hot, right?"

Roxie let out a laugh despite herself. "Yeah, he's definitely hot."

"I mean, you've got to expect some kind of chemistry in scenes like that," Janie said thoughtfully. "Romantic leads have to have it, or the movie's a flop. But... do you think there's more to it?"

"That's the thing," Roxie sighed, leaning forward and resting her elbows on her knees. "I don't know. When we're filming, it's like... I can't separate the lines from what I'm feeling. And after the cameras stop, he's still flirting with me, making me feel like it's not just acting."

"Hmm," Janie hummed in thought. "Well, it sounds like you've got two options. You either keep it professional and try not to get caught up in whatever Victor's doing, or you take the plunge and see where it goes."

Roxie bit her lip, her mind racing. "Ryan already warned me about Victor. He said he's got a reputation for being a heartbreaker, and I've seen how charming he can be. But... when we're together, it feels different."

"Of course it does," Janie said, her voice softening. "He's an actor, Roxie. He knows how to make people feel things. But you have to ask yourself, is it worth the risk? You've worked so hard to get where you are, and the last thing you need is for some guy to mess that up."

Roxie closed her eyes, letting Janie's words sink in. She knew her friend was right. Victor was charming, but that charm came with a warning label. She couldn't afford to get distracted, not when her career was just beginning to take off.

"But what if..." Roxie hesitated, her voice barely above a whisper. "What if he's different with me? What if this is real?"

Janie was quiet for a moment, and then she sighed. "Look, Rox, I can't tell you what's real and what isn't. Only you can figure that out. But just promise me you'll be careful, okay? Hollywood is full of guys like Victor, and I don't want to see you get hurt."

"I will," Roxie promised, though her mind was still tangled in thoughts of Victor.

"Good," Janie replied, her tone lightening again. "Now, let's focus on the positive. You're the lead in a major film! That's incredible, Roxie. You've made it."

Roxie smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her at her friend's encouragement. "Thanks, Janie. I guess I just needed to hear that."

"Anytime," Janie said with a grin in her voice. "Now go get some rest. You've got a movie to carry, and I know you're going to crush it."

After they hung up, Roxie sat on the couch for a long time, staring at her phone. Janie's words had helped, but they hadn't untangled the knot of emotions inside her. She was excited about the role, about the opportunities ahead of her. But the thought of Victor lingered like a shadow over everything.

Could she really trust him? Or was he just another Hollywood heartbreaker, waiting to leave her in the dust?

Roxie sighed, setting her phone down and running a hand through her hair. She needed to focus on her career, on the role of a lifetime that she had been given. But no matter how hard she tried, her thoughts kept drifting back to Victor, his smile, his touch, and the way he made her feel when the cameras stopped rolling.

Later that night, after preparing a simple dinner and cleaning up her small apartment, Roxie curled up in bed with her journal, hoping to make sense of her emotions. She flipped through the pages, reading over her past entries, each one chronicling her journey from struggling actress to where she was now. She had always been focused, always driven. But now, she felt more conflicted than ever.

Staring at the blank page in front of her, she tapped her pen against the paper, trying to find the right words. Finally, she began to write.

I don't know what to do. Being the lead in this movie is everything I've ever wanted, but the lines between acting and real life are starting to blur. Victor makes me feel things I don't want to feel, things that I know could be dangerous. But when we're together, it's like I can't help myself.

She paused, chewing on the end of the pen.

Is it worth it? Am I getting caught up in something that will only hurt me in the end? Or is this just what happens when you spend so much time with someone on set, when you have to pretend to be in love?

Roxie sighed, closing the journal without finishing the entry. She couldn't find the answers tonight, and she wasn't sure she ever would. All she knew was that the more time she spent with Victor, the harder it became to keep her emotions in check.

As she lay in bed, the glow of the city lights filtering through her window, Roxie couldn't stop thinking about Victor. His smile, his words, the way he had looked at her during that final take, it was all still so vivid in her mind.

She pulled her purple comforter tighter around her, trying to block out the confusion, but it was no use. Her heart was tangled in knots, and no amount of rational thinking could untangle it.

Eventually, Roxie drifted off to sleep, her dreams filled with scenes from the film, and moments with Victor that felt all too real.

The next morning, the sun streamed through the blinds in Roxie's tiny apartment, gently waking her from a restless night's sleep. She sat up in bed, her thoughts still tangled from the previous day. It felt like she'd been wrestling with her emotions all night, and now, as she prepared for another day on set, the weight of it all pressed down on her.

She dragged herself out of bed, trying to shake off the lingering confusion about Victor. Today was another day of filming, and she needed to focus. This wasn't the time to get swept up in her personal life. Her career was finally taking off, and she couldn't afford any distractions.

As she made her way to the kitchen to make some coffee, her phone buzzed on the counter. She glanced at the screen, her heart skipping a beat when she saw Victor's name flash across it.

Victor: Coffee before set? There's this great spot nearby. I'll be there in 20.

Roxie's stomach did a little flip. Part of her wanted to decline, to keep things professional and not feed into the growing connection between them. But another part of her, the part that couldn't stop thinking about him, was curious. She knew spending time with him outside of work was risky, but she also wanted to know if there was more to their chemistry than just their characters.

After a moment's hesitation, she typed a quick reply.

Roxie: Sure, I'll meet you there.

She couldn't deny the excitement bubbling up inside her as she grabbed her jacket and headed out the door. Whatever was happening between her and Victor, she needed to face it head-on.

The café Victor had mentioned was small and cozy, tucked away on a quiet street not far from the set. Roxie arrived a little early, ordering a simple black coffee and taking a seat by the window. As she waited, she watched people pass by on the sidewalk, her mind wandering to the day ahead.

She had a full schedule, scenes that required her to tap into Natalie's deeper emotions, the kind that left her feeling raw and vulnerable. But after yesterday's breakthrough, she felt more confident in her ability to handle them.

Just as she was starting to relax, the bell above the door chimed, and Victor strolled in, flashing that easy smile that made her heart race. He spotted her instantly and made his way over, his presence commanding even in a simple leather jacket and jeans.

"Morning," Victor greeted her, taking a seat across from her. "You beat me here."

"Couldn't sleep," Roxie admitted, offering him a small smile. "Too much on my mind."

Victor raised an eyebrow, his smile turning slightly more teasing. "Anything you want to talk about?"

Roxie hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal. She wasn't ready to dive into the complexities of their relationship, or lack thereof, just yet. Instead, she deflected with a question of her own.

"You seem pretty relaxed about everything," she said, studying him. "Doesn't anything ever phase you?"

Victor chuckled softly, leaning back in his chair. "It's all part of the job. You've got to stay calm, or this industry will eat you alive."

Roxie nodded, but she couldn't help but feel like there was more to him than he let on. He wore his confidence like armor, but there had to be cracks underneath. She just wasn't sure how close she wanted to get to finding them.

"You're doing great, though," Victor continued, his tone sincere. "Yesterday was a tough day of filming, and you handled it like a pro. Not everyone can make a scene feel that real."

Roxie felt a blush rise to her cheeks at his compliment. "Thanks. I guess... I just really connected with the character."

Victor's gaze softened as he leaned forward slightly. "It's more than that. You've got something special, Roxie. It's not just about the character, it's about you."

Her breath caught in her throat at his words. There it was again, that feeling that their connection went beyond acting. For a moment, the noise of the café faded away, and all Roxie could focus on was Victor, sitting across from her with that intense, unreadable look in his eyes.

But then, as quickly as the moment came, it passed. Victor straightened up, his playful smile returning. "Anyway, we should probably get going. Don't want to be late for another day of emotional rollercoasters, right?"

Roxie laughed, grateful for the lightness in his tone. "Yeah, I guess we should."

When they arrived on set, Roxie felt a renewed sense of determination. She had a job to do, and no matter how complicated her feelings for Victor were, she couldn't let them interfere. This was her moment, her chance to prove that she belonged in this world, and she wasn't about to let anything or anyone distract her.

The day's scenes were more emotionally draining than the ones before. In one, Natalie confronted her past trauma, revealing her deepest fears to Ethan. It was a raw, vulnerable moment, and Roxie knew she had to tap into something real to make it work.

As the cameras rolled, Roxie poured everything she had into the scene, letting Natalie's pain and fear bleed through in her voice.

"You don't understand," Natalie said, her voice shaking as she stood opposite Victor's character. "I've been hurt before. I've let people in, and every time, I've ended up alone. I can't do it again."

Ethan, played by Victor, stepped closer, his expression soft but determined. "You're not alone anymore. I'm not going to leave you, Natalie. Not ever."

Roxie felt the weight of those words settle over her, and for a moment, it didn't feel like acting. The vulnerability, the fear, the connection, it all felt so real. Her eyes filled with tears, and she struggled to hold them back as she continued.

"How do I know you won't leave?" Natalie whispered, her voice barely audible.

Ethan's hand reached out, gently touching her cheek. "Because I love you. And I'm not going anywhere."

The camera held on them for a long moment, the tension between them thick and palpable. Roxie felt the tears slip down her cheeks, her emotions too raw to control. And when the scene finally ended, and Elliot called "cut," she felt a rush of relief and exhaustion.

The crew erupted into quiet applause, and Elliot walked over to her with a satisfied smile. "That was incredible, Roxanne. You brought something real to that scene, something that's going to make this movie unforgettable."

Roxie wiped her tears, smiling through her exhaustion. "Thanks. It was... intense."

"You nailed it," Victor said, stepping up beside her. His hand rested lightly on her shoulder, and the warmth of his touch sent a shiver down her spine. "Seriously, you're something else."

Roxie smiled at him, her heart racing. But even as the praise washed over her, she couldn't shake the confusion in her mind. The chemistry between them was undeniable, and now that they had filmed such an emotionally charged scene, the connection felt stronger than ever.

But she remembered Ryan's warning, and Janie's advice echoed in her head. She had to be careful. She couldn't let her feelings for Victor get in the way of her career.

As the day came to a close, Roxie found herself standing alone by the trailers, staring at the fading light of the sunset. The city hummed in the distance, and for a moment, she let herself be still, absorbing everything that had happened.

Victor's words lingered in her mind. You've got something special.

She couldn't deny it anymore. There was something between them, something that went beyond their characters and their scenes. But was it real? Or was it just the intensity of the film bleeding into her personal life?

As Roxie gathered her things and prepared to head home, she made a decision. She would take things one step at a time, focus on her career, on making the movie the best it could be. But she wouldn't close herself off to the possibility of something real with Victor. She couldn't deny the connection, but she would be cautious. She would protect herself.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket, and she pulled it out to see a message from Ryan.

Ryan: Heard you killed it again today. Proud of you. Let's talk tomorrow about the next big thing.

Roxie smiled to herself, feeling the weight of the day lift just a little. She was making progress, both in her career and in figuring out her feelings. And no matter what happened with Victor, she knew she was on the right path.

As she walked away from the set, the lights of Hollywood twinkling in the distance, Roxie felt something she hadn't felt in a long time.

Hope.