Chapter 45: Let the finals begin!
– Haru –
"Why am I here again?" Tanya grumbled, her tiny arms crossed as she glared at the ground as we walked. "I got eaten by a GIANT FROG the last time I was here in this world. PTSD is a real thing, you know!" she added with an adorable pout.
"You're here because we're going to be the judges for the final hunter exam!" Kunou declared, her tails swishing behind her as she puffed out her chest proudly. "We can make them do whatever we want. They're at our mercy," she added, flashing a cute, menacing glare.
It seemed like my adorable little sister was feeling extra mischievous today. This was probably the most fun she'd had all week. Watching her hype herself up was always entertaining.
"Interesting… What kind of exam is this exactly? Since when do hunters need to be tested?"
I'd like to say I didn't let out a yelp when I heard someone behind me… but I did. At least Tanya and Kunou were equally freaked out.
I spun around and saw Ainz standing there in all his bony glory. Beside him stood the thousand-year-old elf Frieren.
"Where did you two come from?!" Kunou dramatically pointed at them and shouted.
"We've been here the whole time," Ainz replied with a perfectly straight face… which was all his face ever was because, well, no skin.
Frieren's lips twitched as she tried to maintain her composure. The elf wasn't fooling anyone, though, she'd definitely snuck up on us on purpose.
It was Ainz who'd asked the question earlier. "What exactly are hunters?" he added.
I sighed and gave them both a quick rundown on what hunters were, explaining the purpose of the hunter exams and the kind of people who usually became hunters. It wasn't the easiest thing to explain, mostly because I didn't know a lot myself despite being made one randomly along with Tanya and Naruko.
"Interesting," Ainz said, resting a skeletal hand on his chin. "They sound like adventurers, but instead of taking missions from others, they create their own quests. This sounds amusing, let's go." He decided to immediately invite himself along.
Frieren nodded as well.
…Walking down the street toward the hunter headquarters, I couldn't help but notice people parting like we were some kind of plague. And let's be honest, it wasn't because of me, Tanya, or even Frieren. Nope, it was Ainz. Big, bony, and radiating the kind of energy that screamed, "Don't mess with me unless you're ready to die and then get resurrected and then die again..."
Kunou was skipping along happily at my side, oblivious to the terrified stares around us.
Frieren, walking just a little behind us, tilted her head. "So, Haru, how exactly are you planning this final exam? And can I help? Fern's out shopping with our new companion Stark, and I'm bored."
I let out a chuckle. "Help? Sure you guys can! As for a plan… I was just gonna wing it."
Tanya stopped dead in her tracks, her hands on her hips. "You're going to wing it? That's… that's ridiculously unprofessional! These people are counting on you to run a proper exam, and you're just going to make it up as you go?" Sometimes, she was a real stickler for rules and regulations.
I shrugged. "Pretty much. Besides, it's not like I'm getting paid for this."
"That's not the point!" Tanya said in exasperation.
"I'd like to see how strong these potential hunters are. Do they possess any unique abilities or skills?" Ainz was interested as well.
"Yeah, they do have some strange powers," I told him a bit about what I'd noticed last time we were here.
Our group was just about to reach the hunter headquarters when I decided to turn to Ainz. "So, how are things going back in your world?" I asked. "Specifically, how's Gazeff and the royal family he serves? Gazeff's a respectable guy, so I figured the kingdom he's pledged to must be the same, right?"
Frieren, Tanya, and Ainz all snorted at the same time.
I blinked. That wasn't exactly the reaction I was expecting.
"I hate to tell you this, Haru," Tanya started, "but you're incredibly lucky. Your mom is one of the most just and fair rulers I've ever heard of, but she's the exception. The rest of the world doesn't operate like that."
"Yeah," Frieren chimed in, shaking her head. "The greed of humans should never be underestimated. If there's a chance to screw someone over for personal gain, they'll take it."
I turned to Ainz last, my ears drooping a little bit. He scratched his bony cheek awkwardly—well, where his cheek would have been if he had flesh.
"Er…right," he said, sounding almost embarrassed. "I got so caught up in all the fun we were about to have that I forgot the whole reason I came to find you in the first place. Er…I don't know how to really say this without it being awkward, but uh…we're maybe…kind of at war."
I sputtered. "What!?"
"What!? Why!?" Kunou shouted, her tails drooping as she looked sad all of a sudden.
Ainz sighed, his skeletal shoulders slumping slightly. "Remember when you—well, technically the goddess—paid for all that territory around Enri's village and the Re-Estize Kingdom happily sold you that land to get out of debt?"
"Yeah, I remember."
Ainz continued, "Well, it turns out the prince of the kingdom found out about the deal. And when he discovered that they sold the land to, and I quote, 'a filthy demi-human monster,' he decided to declare the deal null and void. Despite the fact that they're obviously planning on keeping all the gold. Or rather, they already spent it."
"Oh, for fuck's sake," I muttered, running a hand through my hair.
Kunou's ears perked up. "That's so unfair! They can't just take the money and back out of the deal!"
"Welcome to politics, Kunou. You'll have to deal with all this crap when you're older." Tanya said dryly. "And now a bunch of people are going to die because of it. Although it won't be our people!" Tanya declared passionately!
She'd really connected with the Yokai faction during her time here…
"Politics sucks..." Kunou grumbled and Tanya patted her head.
As we approached the hunter headquarters I saw Netero personally waiting outside and he waved at us. "Hey there, young Haru! Glad you made it. What's wrong? You look upset," he said, his eyes flicking over to Ainz and Frieren with mild surprise. "And who are your... friends?" he added with a tiny nervous glance for Ainz in particular.
"Oh, it's just some bad news," I said, waving him off.
Ainz and Frieren introduced themselves briefly, and I filled Netero in.
"It's a whole complicated situation," Ainz explained, "but Demiurge broke it down for me."
Netero frowned and then nodded in understanding. "Do you need to leave?" he asked me.
I shook my head. "No, we're already here after all and I could use some actual fun before things get stressful for a bit. I'll have to tell my mother about all this soon though."
Was I pissed off that people I've never met before had reneged on a deal that I didn't even personally set up?
Kind of…
Ainz spoke up again, saying that was already covered. Lupusregina Beta was already on the way to her palace to tell her everything that was going on...and to officially meet my mom and "introduce" herself.
I was sure Yasaka was going to tease me later about another red-headed werewolf.
I shook my head rapidly and I decided to put the negative topics aside so we could focus on why we were here.
We were here to have some fun and torture these contestants!
…I mean give them a fair and completely non-biased challenge!
Yeah… that last one!
…
An hour later…
Despite the bad news I'd received earlier, I was having trouble keeping the smirk off my face as I stood in the middle of the large open hall. My friends and little sister were gathered around me, and honestly? Sometimes, a kitsune just needed to pull some mischief to feel better.
"Hi Tanya-chan!" Gon shouted, waving enthusiastically as he bounced on his heels like an overexcited puppy. "You missed out on a whole bunch of fun! We got stuck in a room together for over 50 hours. It was the best sleepover ever!"
"50 hours...? Trapped together…?" Tanya looked absolutely horrified at the thought. She turned her head and did her best to ignore both Gon and Killua, who were now pouting at her obvious rejection.
The other contestants were staring at our group nervously. It seemed like my reputation from when I crashed the earlier stages of the exam had stuck with me. Specifically, a certain magician—or clown, depending on who you asked—looked like he wanted to be anywhere else. Or maybe he was actually just scared of Tanya…
I stepped toward the gathered contestants and cleared my throat, letting my grin widen. "Welcome to the final stage of the hunter exam! Here, you'll be tested to see if you have what it takes to be a real hunter."
Kunou, standing beside me, puffed out her chest confidently and added, "And if you suck, then you're out!"
"What is this, bring your little sister to work day?" Leorio muttered but was promptly shut up when Kurapika smacked him.
Before I could respond, Gon suddenly blurted out, "Is that your sister, Haru? She's cute!"
Killua groaned and facepalmed as Kunou's cheeks flushed a bright pink. "Eeeeh!?"
I couldn't help but chuckle as I reached over and ruffled her hair. "Yep, that's my little sister. Kunou, meet Gon and Killua. Gon's the one embarrassing himself right now."
Kunou's blush deepened, but she straightened up and tried to look dignified. "It's nice to meet you both…"
– Killua –
This whole exam had been a breeze up until now. But Killua had a sinking feeling that things were about to get a lot more complicated. Haru and Tanya being back so soon and them being proctors was not something he was expecting to happen! Killua hadn't managed to pass the last time Haru was a guest proctor, although that was a cooking challenge. He hoped there was no cooking in this exam.
It didn't help their chances that Gon had to make things even more embarrassing! The moment he spotted Haru's little sister, Kunou, he'd immediately blurted out, "Is that your sister, Haru? She's cute!"
Killua groaned, running a hand through his hair. Gon was his best friend, no question about it, but sometimes… sometimes he wondered if Gon had been dropped on his head one too many times as a kid?
Kunou blushed at the declaration and her fluffy tails swished behind her.
Killua could admit, in his head at least, that she was pretty adorable. But he wasn't about to say it out loud like his idiot friend.
Haru clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "It's time for the first contestants to step forward!" His finger pointed directly at Killua and Gon.
Gon grinned ear to ear. "Alright! We're going to pass this thing easily and finally become hunters!"
Killua raised an eyebrow. His assassin instincts screamed that Haru had something devious planned, and when the fox man, letting Tanya and Kunou take his place, that feeling was confirmed!
"We've decided to split up the contestants by the type of hunters they want to be," Tanya explained, her sharp tone making it clear she wasn't here to play around. She gestured to Kunou, who stood with a mischievous glint in her eyes. "And we've done a little research on each of you to assign appropriate proctors."
Killua crossed his arms, waiting for whatever nonsense was coming next.
Tanya turned to Gon first. "Gon, I learned that your dad is a piece of shit who abandoned you as a baby, and now you're trying to track him down."
"Yep!" Gon said enthusiastically and unashamed, completely missing the looks of pity from the other contestants…
Tanya's eyes shifted to Killua. "And you're just here because it sounded fun. But since you're Gon's best friend and practically glued to his side, you'll probably end up helping him track down his deadbeat dad anyway."
Killua shrugged. That wasn't entirely wrong. She was right. He didn't have anything better to do.
Gon grinned at him, that dopey, happy expression plastered all over his face. Killua sighed. "What's the objective?"
Tanya smirked, gesturing to Kunou. "You have half an hour to catch her. Or more accurately, touch her."
Kunou puffed out her chest, her tails wagging. "I'm super fast and tricky! Let's play extreme tag! You're both it!"
Killua rolled his eyes. How hard could it be to catch a ten-year-old fox girl?
"Go!" Tanya shouted.
Before Gon could even react, Killua vanished in a blur, reappearing right in front of Kunou. Her wide-eyed surprise told him she hadn't expected his speed. He smirked, reaching out to grab her shoulder—only for his hand to pass straight through her.
"An illusion?!" Killua growled as the Kunou in front of him faded like a mirage.
"You'll have to do better than that!" Kunou called out from across the room, sticking her tongue out at him.
"She can make clones of herself and turn invisible!" Gon exclaimed, looking impressed. "This is going to be really hard!"
Killua scoffed. "Now that I know her trick, I won't fall for it again."
That's when something slammed into the side of his face and exploded.
"C-Chili powder?!" Killua coughed and hacked, his eyes watering as he turned to see Tanya holding a paintball gun… except it definitely wasn't filled with paintballs.
"You didn't think there wouldn't be obstacles, did you?" Tanya said smugly. "You two have to catch Kunou while I'm shooting these chili pepper balls at you!"
"That's not fair!" Killua shouted, still rubbing at his burning eyes.
"Fairness is overrated," Tanya replied, firing another shot—this time at Gon.
Gon let out a startled yelp and dived behind Leorio, who'd been standing off to the side watching the chaos. "What the hell, Gon?!" Leorio yelled, only to take the hit straight to the face.
The room erupted in laughter as Leorio fell to the ground, clutching his face and rolling around like a drama queen. "I'm not even part of this exam!" he whined.
– Frieren –
A couple minutes later…
They were standing out back behind the large exam building.
"Hello, I am Frieren," she said simply, introducing herself to Leorio and Pokkle. The two of them couldn't have been more different in personality and goals, yet they shared something in common—neither aspired to be combat hunters. Leorio wanted to become a doctor, while Pokkle's dream was to research and protect endangered animals. Both were admirable goals, Frieren had to admit. She respected their intentions.
"Hello," Leorio replied. His voice sounded polite but strained, and his eyes were still red and puffy.
Frieren silently waved her staff, casting a simple healing spell. Leorio blinked in surprise as his irritated eyes cleared up and his runny nose stopped altogether.
"How did you do that?!" Leorio exclaimed in astonishment.
Pokkle's jaw nearly dropped as he took a step back, equally stunned by what he'd just witnessed.
"I've spent most of my life learning magic," Frieren explained. "But that's far from all I've learned." She waved her staff again, and the barren field around them erupted in a breathtaking display of color. Tens of thousands of vibrant flowers sprang up, blanketing the area.
"Oh my god," Leorio muttered, looking around in awe.
Frieren smirked slightly. This was her favorite spell for a reason. "Your exam isn't particularly difficult," she began. "Hidden among this field of flowers are ten specific types. Each of them is valuable for creating healing salves that could save the life of a human or an animal in an emergency."
She conjured glowing, holographic images of the ten flowers, giving Leorio and Pokkle a clear visual of what they were looking for. "Your task is simple: find and bring me one of these flowers each. However," she added, "you only have three chances. If you bring me the wrong flower three times, you fail."
Leorio's jaw tightened. Pokkle's brows furrowed in concentration.
"Also, you only have an hour," Frieren finished, leaning casually on her staff. She let her words hang in the air for a moment, watching as panic slowly crept into their expressions. It was amusing.
"An hour?!" Leorio groaned!
Pokkle looked more composed but still uneasy. "We'll have to move carefully," he muttered, mostly to himself. "Rushing could destroy one of the flowers we need."
Frieren gave a small nod. "Exactly. This test isn't just about identifying the right flowers, it's about handling them with care. A healer or protector must always consider the fragility of life."
Frieren stepped back, motioning for them to begin. "Good luck. Remember, you only have three tries, so choose wisely."
The two of them spread out cautiously, carefully moving through the flower field.
– Haru –
WHAM!
"Welcome to your final exam," I said with a grin as the old martial artist hit the floor unconscious after one punch. Honestly, I was surprised he'd even made it this far.
Kurapika and Hanzo, my last two contestants, glanced down at the slumped guy nervously.
"This guy was way too old and weak to ever compete with you two," I told them. "It's a miracle he made it this far, but let's face it, he'd only get himself killed if he kept going."
Kurapika's eyes narrowed as he looked back up at me. "So, the final exam is combat then?"
Hanzo rubbed the back of his neck. "I like to think I'm pretty strong, but… I'm not sure we can take you on, Haru. Even together, we'd stand no chance. Aren't you, like… a god?"
Kurapika snapped his head toward Hanzo, wide-eyed. "What?"
Hanzo nodded seriously. "In my home country, nine-tailed foxes are regarded as deities… mythical beings people pray to. I never thought they were real, until now." He turned and gave me a respectful bow.
I'll admit, I wasn't used to people bowing to me like quite that openly. It was… weird. But I bowed back anyway. "Thanks, I guess? But you two don't have to worry. I'll be taking it easy on you both… I'm not Ainz, after all." I smirked.
BOOM!
The floor and walls suddenly shook like a freakin' earthquake hit us. I could feel the immense pressure coming from the room where Ainz was doing his part of the exam. That guy… he didn't know the meaning of "easy." He'd taken the two most dangerous finalists—Hisoka and Gittarackur, a.k.a. Pincushion Guy—and locked them in a room with him. I wasn't sure if I should be impressed or scared for them.
"What's going on over there?" Hanzo asked, glancing toward the source of the explosion.
"That's just Ainz," I said casually. Hisoka and Pincushion Dude have some weird abilities, and Ainz wants to see everything they've got. Pretty sure neither of them is walking out without showing him. It's similar to something called Touki, but… different. I noticed that the chairman and Menchi both had the power as well. It's something unique to this world, but we were curious if other people could learn it too.
"Are you both ready?" I asked them.
They both nodded in determination. Hanzo unsheathed some daggers that had been hidden in his sleeves and Kurapika drew two wooden swords from behind his back.
"Alright," I said, stepping back a little. One of my tails popped off and reformed into a clone of myself. It was only at one-eighth of my total power, but let's be real, even that was going to give them a run for their money.
"Your objective is simple: make my clone bleed," I told them. A task that was going to be much easier said than done.
They didn't waste any time and both darted forwards!
XXX
Thanks for reading!!!
I have a patreo n. My subs can read advanced updates of my stories ahead of standard release and even check out pics for some of the more naughty chapters.
Link:
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Here is the list of Current Advanced Chapters:
The Fallen Gamer ch 314-318
The Blood Queen 32
The Fox Hole ch 49
Thunder and Black Wings 8
The Fox Hole ch 48
The Blood Queen ch 31
The fox hole ch 47
Thunder and Black Wings 7
The Titan ch 23
The Fox Hole 46
Thunder and Black Wings ch 6