The tension in the air was so thick, it felt suffocating. Mrs. Choi's offer echoed in my mind as I stood there, my hand gripping the phone with Jun's message on the screen.
Seong was still glaring at his mother, but the fierce protection in his eyes did nothing to calm the storm swirling inside me. Every word she'd said hit me where it hurt the most, deepening the insecurities I had about being with Jun and Seong.
"I need a moment," I mumbled, barely able to keep my voice steady as I turned toward the door.
"Censia," Seong called after me, his tone urgent. "Don't listen to her. She doesn't understand."
But I didn't stop. I couldn't. My legs carried me to the door before I even had a chance to think. I stepped outside into the cool evening air, closing the door behind me and leaning against it for support.
Jun was standing a few feet away, his eyes immediately locking onto mine. He looked different—troubled, tired, as if the weight of the world was on his shoulders.
"Censia," he said softly, stepping toward me. "We need to talk."
I let out a shaky breath, my mind still spinning from Mrs. Choi's harsh words and Seong's protective stance. "I don't know if I can do this right now, Jun."
He stopped in front of me, his hands reaching out to take mine. "Please. Just hear me out. I... I know things have been hard between us. I know I've messed up. But I can't lose you."
The sincerity in his voice pulled at my heartstrings, but I couldn't ignore the weight of everything pressing down on me—the doubts, the fear, the overwhelming feeling that maybe I didn't belong in their world.
"Your mother—" I began, but Jun cut me off, his grip tightening on my hands.
"Forget what my mother said. She doesn't know what she's talking about." His eyes searched mine, pleading. "Censia, I love you. And Seong loves you. We've both made mistakes, but we can make this work. I need you to believe that."
I wanted to believe him. I wanted to believe that we could figure it all out, that this tangled mess of emotions and confusion could somehow become something beautiful. But the doubts were louder than ever, and Mrs. Choi's offer still echoed in my mind like a cruel reminder of how out of place I felt.
"I don't know if I can keep doing this, Jun," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. "I feel like I'm always caught in the middle, like I don't belong in either of your lives. Maybe your mother's right... maybe I'm just—"
"Don't say that," Jun interrupted, his voice firm. He took a step closer, his body heat radiating toward me. "You belong with us. Both of us. I don't care what my mother thinks, and Seong doesn't either."
He leaned down, pressing his forehead against mine, his voice softening. "I need you, Censia. We both do."
My heart ached at his words, torn between the love I felt for both him and Seong and the overwhelming fear that none of this would ever work. But before I could respond, the door behind me swung open, and Seong stepped outside.
"I don't care what my mother said either," Seong added, his voice calm but unwavering. "We're not letting you go, Censia."
I stared at both of them, my mind swirling in a million directions. The intensity of their feelings, the way they were both looking at me like I was the missing piece to their puzzle—it was too much. It was everything I'd ever wanted and everything I was terrified of.
But before I could say anything, Mrs. Choi's sharp voice cut through the air from inside the apartment. "Censia, come back inside. We're not done."
Jun stiffened, his jaw tightening as he turned toward the door. "I told you to stay out of this, Mother."
"I'm not going anywhere until I know she understands her place in all this," Mrs. Choi snapped, stepping into the doorway.
"Enough!" I shouted, my voice breaking as I pulled away from both Jun and Seong. "This is too much. I can't take this anymore!"
The words spilled out before I could stop them, and the look on Jun's face shattered something inside me. His eyes widened in shock, and Seong reached for me, but I stepped back, putting distance between us.
"I need space," I said, my voice trembling. "I need to think. I need to figure out what I want, and I can't do that with all of this pressure."
Jun's eyes darkened with pain, and Seong's expression softened, but I could see the hurt in both of them.
"Please," I whispered, my voice barely holding together. "I just need some time."
---
I walked away from them that night, leaving Jun and Seong standing together in front of the apartment. Mrs. Choi's words still rang in my ears, but so did Jun's—pleading, loving, desperate.
For days, I stayed at my cousin Allure's place, avoiding their calls, avoiding their texts. I didn't have the strength to face either of them, not while my heart was in turmoil. Allure had been supportive, giving me the space I needed to sort through my emotions without pressuring me to talk. But every time I closed my eyes, all I could see was Jun's face, Seong's soft eyes, and the tension in the air between us.
---
A week passed before I finally decided to leave the safety of my cousin's apartment. I couldn't avoid the world forever, no matter how much I wanted to. It was a late afternoon, and the sun was beginning to set, casting a warm orange glow across the city streets.
As I made my way back to my apartment to gather some things, I had an eerie feeling that someone was following me. I shook it off, telling myself it was just the paranoia of being alone after everything that had happened. But as I neared the door of my apartment, I felt a presence behind me.
Before I could turn, a hand clamped down on my arm, yanking me back hard. I stumbled, gasping in shock as I was slammed against the wall.
"Miss me?" a voice hissed in my ear.
My heart dropped. It was Hyun Su.
"Let go of me!" I tried to pull away, but his grip tightened.
"You ruined my life," he spat, his face twisted with rage. "Do you know what you did to me? Now I'm going to make you pay."
Panic surged through me as I struggled against him, but he was too strong. He pushed me inside my apartment, slamming the door behind him, trapping me.
"Please, Hyun Su, don't do this," I begged, tears streaming down my face.
But he didn't listen. His hands were rough, his grip painful as he pushed me toward the bed. My heart raced in terror, every muscle in my body tensing as I tried to fight him off.
But just as he was about to overpower me, the door burst open.
"Nathan!" I gasped, relief flooding through me as I saw his familiar figure.
Nathan didn't waste a second. He tackled Hyun Su to the ground, pulling him off me with a force that knocked the wind out of both of them. They struggled for a moment before Nathan finally subdued him, holding him down as he called the police.
I collapsed onto the bed, sobbing, my body trembling with fear and relief. Nathan's presence was a lifeline, pulling me back from the brink of despair.
As I sat there, gasping for breath, I knew one thing for sure—I couldn't keep living like this. Something had to change, and it had to change soon.