My heart hammered wildly in my ribs as I stared at the note in my trembling hands.
Written in red ink was: "You're not welcome here."
I swallowed hard when I understood why red ink was used.
Yeah, I got the message loud and clear.
"Ravenna?" I jumped at Lilith's voice. I forgot I wasn't alone.
"Yeah?" I answered as I hid the note in the pant's pocket.
"Are you okay? Why're you just standing there?"
"I'm okay. I just want to use the toilet."
I rushed into the bathroom, and flushed the note down the toilet.
Why was I hiding the note? Shouldn't I have shown it to Lilith so she would know this floor wasn't as safe as she thought?
It's okay. I'm okay. I wasn't going to leave this room. I would keep the door locked. And if they somehow broke into the room, I knew how to defend myself.
I washed my face, and headed back to the room. Thoughts about the note buried deep in my mind.
***
It's been days since I've settled into the pack. So far there hasn't been another note or anybody breaking into my room.
Lilith spends most of her time with me. When she wasn't here, I spent my time reading the books she brought.
The fridge at the corner of the room was stocked with food and snacks, contrary to Alpha Rowan.
I had thought he hated me but I guess I was wrong.
Two days ago Lilith and Joseph had come with their hands filled with clothes, junk, snacks and drink.
Not all the snacks could fit into the fridge so some were placed on top.
I wanted to thank the Alpha personally but I was told there was no need and should just stay in my room.
I hear the unspoken message there: Don't come out.
Yeah, I didn't want to. I was comfortable in my little haven with books and junks.
Such a lie.
My legs were itching to walk around. I had never been the type to sit in one place.
I liked to walk and take in my environment. That was the only time the voices in my head seemed to be quiet. They've been quite loud lately.
I sighed and tossed the book I've been trying to ride aside. I stared at the same paragraph for five minutes and I still couldn't make out what I was reading.
I didn't want to read today, I wanted to walk around. But I couldn't. So I had to find something else to do.
I walked over to the large window and gazed down at the pack, going about their lives. This has become part of my daily routine.
From this vantage point, I could observe the world below. Although the faces were blurred from such a height, I could still make out the figures of individuals.
Today was no different from any other day. The pack moved about their tasks, some gathering in groups, chatting among themselves.
But today's routine seems to have a twist.
Alpha Rowan was the twist.
He stood there, talking with two other people I didn't know. He still wore his suit but he had taken off his jacket.
This high up I couldn't make out his expression well, but he seems relaxed.
Sensing eyes on him, he raised his gaze and looked in my direction. I quickly backed away from the window, feeling my face burn.
I was caught staring. Again.
Well, my routine for today was ruined.
I walked back to my book and tried to read again. I managed to clear my head and focus more on the book.
A knock came at my book where I had just gotten to the most interesting part of the book. I had half a mind to ignore the person and continue my book, but I knew it was Lilith and I couldn't ignore her.
"You know you—" As I opened the door, the words caught on my throat.
I couldn't complete my words because standing in front of me was Rowan.
He was still without his jacket, and this close I could see he left two upper buttons undone on his shirt, showing a hint of golden skin.
"Ravenna." There was a hint of a smile on his full lips.
God, I loved it when he said my name.
"A-alpha," I stuttered as I willed my face not to burn and embarrass myself. "I wasn't expecting you." My voice came out stronger this time.
"I know. I just wanted to see how you were settling in."
"Oh okay."
"Am I not welcome?" He tilted his head slightly, the smirk still on his face.
"What? Of course you are! Why wouldn't you be?" I exclaimed, incredulous.
"Because I'm still standing by your door." He said it as a joke but I still flushed in embarrassment.
"I'm sorry. Please come in."
I stepped aside, and he strode in with an air of confidence, his eyes scanning the room as if assessing every detail in an instant.
He looked like a model straight out of those magazines I've always seen Zara reading. Me, on the other hand, looked like I had just rolled out of a tornado—disheveled hair, mismatched socks, and an expression that screamed "I wasn't expecting this."
He sat at the only sofa in the room and I sat at the edge of my bed.
I picked my nails, unable to look at him.
This was so awkward and tense.
Rowan cleared his throat. "Are you settling just fine?"
I finally let my nails rest and looked up at him. "Yes. It's wonderful here. And thank you for the clothes and these." I gestured towards the fridge.
"It's no problem." He settled deeper into the sofa. "I understand this might be hard for you. Boring maybe."
"What is?" I cocked my head.
"Being confined to this room," he answered carefully. "I promise you're not a prisoner here. It's just that my people won't be able to accept you—at least not yet."
"Not yet?" I asked, hope blooming in my voice.
He nodded. "They'll accept when you've proved not to be a spy or worse. We don't give out trust easily."
"So I've been told." I said, my voice soft. Then more steadily, I said, "How do I prove myself?"
Rowan didn't answer for a while, he just watched me. I wanted to look away from his eyes but I forced myself to hold his gaze.
He got up suddenly and walked to me. He was so close, I had to raise my head to look at him.
"Will you be able to do it?" he whispered and I swallowed.