Chapter 7 - Chapter 7: Lil' Gideon

Summary:

Mabel, Dipper, and Steven contend with Gravity Falls' beloved phsycic, Lil' Gideon, who may not be as "charming" as he seems...

Steven hummed to himself as he tuned his ukulele. It didn't take him long to get it just right, and once he did, he launched into strumming a cheery tune off the top of his head. On the floor beside him, Dipper and Mabel tuned out the dull round of commercials playing on TV in favor of listening to the much more pleasant melody filling the shack's den. It was a relaxing way to spend the afternoon, especially after their hectic search for the Light Cannons the previous day. As soon as Steven brought his song to an end, Mabel was the first to launch into bright applause over such an impressive performance. 

"Wow, Steven! That was great! Where'd you learn how to play so good anyway?"

"Well, my dad taught me the basics when I was little," Steven explained as he continued plucking notes. "But I taught myself a lot of the songs I know. It's really not that hard once you get the hang of it."

"It's not, huh…?" Mabel mused as an idea struck her. "You know, I've always wanted to learn how to play something. Maybe you could teach me how to play the ukulele, Steven!"

Steven gasped, more than ready to accept, before Dipper spoke up in his stead. "Wait, Mabel, you mean you're actually going to commit to learning how to play an instrument?" he asked, smirking. "Like you did when you tried to learn to play the violin? Or the oboe? Or the xylophone?"

"Oh, ha ha , Dipper," Mabel chucked one of the balls of yarn she was knitting with at him. "We can't all instantly 'master' the sousaphone, like some people…"

"Mabel!" Dipper protested, embarrassed. 

"Wait! Wait! Wait!" Steven cut in. "First of all, of course I'll teach you, Mabel! But only if you show me how to knit. I'd love to be able to make a sweater as good as you can!"

"Deal!" 

"Second of all, Dipper, you can play the sousaphone?"

"Uh… kinda," Dipper winced. "I only know how to play it because our mom forced me to."

"Yeah, and he's super good at it!" Mabel added, as much as Dipper wished she wouldn't. "I bet you guys could play an awesome ukulele-sousaphone duet!"

"Yeah!" Steven smiled, stars in his eyes. 

Dipper, however, was much less on board as he glanced away, flusteredly clearing his throat. "I don't know if that's-" He stopped short when a mysterious chime sounded from the TV, catching everyone's attention.

Another commercial had come on, though this one already seemed to be far more interesting than the rest as an announcer posed the question: "Are you completely miserable?"

"Yes!" the actor on screen wailed dramatically. 

"Then you need to meet… Gideon."

"Gideon?" Dipper asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"What makes him so special?" Mabel asked, intrigued. 

"Oh, I know Gideon," Steven said. "He's-"

"He's a psychic!" the commercial explained just before he could. "Don't waste your time with other so-called 'men of mystery'." Said "man of mystery" was none other than Stan, as an unflattering image of him popped up on screen, with the word FRAUD stamped onto it. "Hurry on down to Gideon's Tent of Telepathy tonight for an evening of magic and delight for all!"

"Oo! I'm getting all curious inside!" Mabel leaned in as the commercial continued. "This Gideon guy sounds pretty mysterious!"

"Steven, you said you know him?" Dipper asked. "Is he actually the real deal?"

"Er… Well, I've been to a few of his shows, and he sure seems like he's a real psychic…" Steven rubbed the back of his neck. "The Gems don't think so though, but then again, they don't think most of the stuff here at the Mystery Shack is real either."

"That's because nothing here is real," Dipper noted dryly. 

"Eh, maybe," Steven shrugged. "Still, I think the shack is a lot more fun than the Tent of Telepathy anyway."

"That's 'cause the Tent of Telepathy is just a two-bit sham!" Stan entered the den. He'd overheard at least a little, and based on the sour look on his face alone, he was far from pleased with any of it. "Ever since that monster Gideon rolled into town, I've had nothin' but trouble! He's a no-account punk, and that's that."

"So… is he a real psychic or not?" Mabel asked regardless. 

"I say we go and find out," Dipper suggested. While Mabel and Steven were both on board with this plan, Stan was quick to harshly shut it down. 

"Never!" he snapped. "You're forbidden from patronizing the competition! In fact, I'd rather you two be up at the Gems' temple than anywhere near that Gideon freak."

"So you're ok with us hanging out at Steven's place whenever we want?" Mabel asked with a leading smile. "Gee, thanks, Grunkle Stan!"

"What? No! That's not what I–gah!" Stan huffed, annoyed. "Whatever. Doesn't matter. What does matter is that you don't need to go anywhere near Gideon's to know that he's a fake! He's about as much of a psychic as I am a flamenco dancer."

"Mr. Pines, you're a flamenco dancer?" Steven asked, awestruck. "Wow! I'm learning so much about you guys today!"

Stan rolled his eyes, not even dignifying Steven with a response as he continued.. "Long story short, you two knuckle-heads better stay away from Gideon," he issued the twins a stern warning. "No one that lives under my roof is allowed under his roof!"

With that, Stan turned on his heel and stormed out. Despite how forceful and final his orders had been, the kids' shared curiosity still persisted all the same. 

"Do tents even have roofs?" Dipper asked as soon as Stan was out of earshot. 

"Not that I know of," Steven said with a growing smile.

"Well, boys, I think we just found a loophole!" Mabel proclaimed, holding up a string she'd tied a loop into. "Literally!"

The trio laughed as they got up to head out and see the tantalizing Tent of Telepathy for themselves. As the commercial on TV came to a close, it beckoned them, and anyone else watching to do the same. To put Gravity Falls' famous resident psychic's talents to the test:

"So come on down, folks! Gideon's expecting you…"

It hadn't taken much for Dipper and Mabel to convince Soos to come with them to the Tent of Telepathy, and likewise, Steven had managed to talk Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl into showing up too. Largely, because he hadn't bothered telling them where they were even going until they arrived at the surprisingly crowded tent on the far side of town. 

"Ugh, this place?" Amethyst groaned loudly as soon as she spotted the tent's sign. "You've gotta be kidding, Steven. You know that Gideon kid is a fake! Why don't we bail and hang out back at the shack instead? At least the stuff Stan has there is weird in a funny way and not in a lame way like… all this."

Her point was all but proven when Soos called out to the group from his spot near one of the funhouse mirrors perched near the tent's entrance. "Yo dudes! Check this out!" he waved at his warped reflection, utterly fascinated by it. "It's like I'm saying hi to a version of me from another dimension where I'm like… super tall."

A beat of unimpressed silence passed between the kids and the Gems before Pearl spoke up to end it. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with Amethyst. There really isn't anything of genuine worth here… Though I can't in good conscience say the Mystery Shack is much better…"

"Aw, come on, you guys!" Steven urged the Gems to follow him inside. He threw on his best pleading pout for good measure; if there was anything that had a chance at changing their minds, it'd be that. "This place isn't that bad. At least stick around for a while… for me? Please?"

The Gems shared a disgruntled sigh, unable to resist. As they begrudgingly took their seats alongside Steven, the twins, and Soos, they were far from the only ones to turn out for the highly-anticipated show. "Man, it's amazing how many people showed up for this," Dipper noted, glancing around at the packed tent. "Are Gideon's shows usually this popular?"

"Yes," Garnet replied, crossing her arms. "Somehow."

"Shh!" Mabel quieted them as spotlights began flooding the stage. "It's starting!"

"Let's see what this 'monster' looks like," Dipper muttered mostly to himself. The accusations Stan had levied against Gideon were brutal, but certainly, he couldn't actually live up to them. Could he?

The crowd seemed to hold its collective breath as an imposing silhouette appeared behind the curtain. But when that curtain was pulled back, the figure standing behind it was… smaller. Much smaller, in fact. 

For all the things Dipper and Mabel had been expecting, what they hadn't anticipated was that Gideon would be just a child–a child younger than either of them at that. Most of his miniscule height was made up of his perfectly shaped white pompadour, which complimented his powder-blue suit and matching cape. He opened his performance up by flashing the crowd a winning smile, which they readily ate up in a round of adoring cheers. 

"Hello, America!" Gideon greeted with a heavy southern drawl. "My name is Lil' Gideon!" With a simple clap of his hands, a flock of doves suddenly flew out from their hiding place somewhere within his large hair. 

While most of the audience was even more taken with such a trick, the Gems didn't share their excitement in the slightest. "Oh please," Amethyst rolled her eyes. "Any chump can get a bunch of birds to fly out of their hair. In fact…"

"No, Amethyst," Pearl shot her emerging idea down before she could even say it aloud. 

" That's Stan's mortal enemy?" Dipper asked, baffled as Gideon continued adorably parading around the stage. 

"But he's so wittle!" Mabel protested, grinning. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is such a gift to have you all here tonight!" Gideon proclaimed to the crowd. "Such a gift! I have a vision ; I predict that you all will soon say, "aww"." With this, Gideon struck a cute pose, one that was more than enough to elicit a round of "awws" from the charmed audience before him. 

"It came true!" Mabel gasped. 

"I know!" Steven added excitedly. "Amazing, isn't it?"

"What?" Dipper turned to the pair, scoffing. "I'm not impressed."

"Oh, come on!" Mabel teased. "You're totally impressed!"

"Hit it, Dad!" Gideon called to his father down at the piano. He began playing a jaunty, upbeat tune, one that Gideon broke into a cheery jig along to. The crowd's growing delight only skyrocketed when he added a song into the mix. "Oh I can see what others can't see! It ain't some sideshow trick, its innate ability! Where others are blind, I am futurely inclined. And you too could see, if you were widdle ol' me! Come on, everybody, rise up! I want ya'll to keep it going!"

As Gideon raised his hand, the crowd did the same. Every last member of the audience stood, including Steven, the twins, Soos, and even the Gems. While Steven, Mabel, and Soos joined the crowd in clapping along to Gideon's song, Dipper and the Gems were far more alarmed than enthralled.

"Wha–? How did he-" Dipper started, surprised that he'd stood when he hadn't wanted to. 

"What just happened?" Pearl whispered to Garnet and Amethyst. The pair could only shrug, though they were even more caught off guard when Gideon tossed a handful of "magic" down to the audience below. Most of it landed squarely on Steven and the Gems, as if he'd intentionally aimed at them, though they quickly discovered it wasn't as "magical" as he claimed it to be. 

"Is this uncooked rice?" Amethyst frowned, pulling a handful out of her hair. She answered her own question when she shoved what she'd gathered into her mouth. "Huh. Yeah, it is. Crunchy."

"Ugh… When can we leave?" Pearl asked Garnet as she plucked rice out of her own hair. 

Garnet didn't answer right away, instead meeting the pleading look Steven was sending her way. "...Soon," she said simply. For Amethyst and Pearl, that "soon" couldn't come quickly enough. 

By now, Gideon had wandered down into the crowd itself, singing straight to his excited audience as he showed off his "clairvoyance". "You wish your son would call you more!" he pointed to an elderly woman. 

"I'm leaving everything to my cats!" the woman exclaimed as a cat napped soundly in her lap.

"I sense that you've been here before," Gideon predicted as he looked over to Sheriff Blubbs, who was decked out in Lil' Gideon official merchandise.

"Oh, what gave it away!"

"I'll read your mind if I'm able," Gideon popped in beside Mabel, sending her a playful wink. "Something tells me your name's Mabel!"

"How did he know?!" Mabel exclaimed, bewildered.

"Uh, maybe it had something to do with the fact that your name is on your sweater," Dipper said, sending his sister a deadpan frown. 

Gideon rushed back on stage, gearing up for his big finish. " So welcome all ye… to the Tent of Telepathy… And thanks for visitin'… widdle ol' me!"

As his song ended, the crowd went wild with applause and cheers, which Gideon was more than happy to soak in as he took a sweeping bow. "Thank you! You people are the real miracles! Now drive home safely, ya'll! And don't forget to stock up on Lil' Gideon merchandise on the way out! Goodnight everyone!"

The audience was still cheering, even as Gideon left the stage. Though Steven and Mabel joined in on their enthusiasm, it wasn't long before the Gems announced that it was time to go. 

"At least it was mercifully short this time…" Pearl said as the group began filing out of the tent.

"Yeah, last time we got dragged into one of these, it was almost an hour," Amethyst groaned, still picking rice out of her hair. 

"Aw, don't be like that, you guys," Steven turned back to them. "Admit it: you all had at least a little fun tonight, right?"

"Not really," Garnet said.

"Steven, we appreciate that you wanted us to join you, but you have to remember, we see real magical things every day," Pearl pointed out. 

"Yeah," Amethyst hung her arms behind her head, grinning. "Nothing phases us. Especially not some four-foot-tall kid with a fancy suit who can put on a little song and dance." She snorted out a laugh, and even Garnet and Pearl couldn't help but smirk along with her at Gideon's expense. 

Steven knew he wouldn't be able to win them over, so he decided to gauge the twin's reactions to the show instead. "So? What'd you guys think?" 

"Well, I didn't think it was possible, but somehow, that kid's an even bigger fraud than Stan," Dipper said with an incredulous grin. "No wonder our uncle's jealous of him!"

"If there's anything you really can say for Gideon is that he does have a bit more… pizzazz than Stan does," Pearl agreed, laughing.

"Oh, come on, you guys," Mabel countered. "His dance moves were adorable! And did you see his hair? It was like, whoosh !"

"You're too easily impressed," Dipper teased. 

"Yeah, yeah," she taunted right back, giving him a playful shove. 

As the group left the Tent of Telepathy behind, none of them noticed a pair of eyes trained on them from the shadows. Anger slipped into the spaces between budding infatuation as Gideon marched back into the now-empty tent, tightly clutching the dully glowing amulet that hung from his neck. 

"So, those fancy-smancy Crystal Gems came to poke their noses 'round in my business, huh?" he muttered, grinning darkly down at his amulet. At the first of hopefully many powerful artifacts he hoped to take from the town's mysterious guardians. "Well golly," he chuckled with nothing less than genuine malice. "I sure do hope they enjoyed the show…"

"Dipper!" Mabel shouted as she ran downstairs the next morning. Her excited call interrupted her brother as he read through the Gem-related entries in the journal. When he glanced up from it, he was met with the sight of his sister's face completely covered in colorful sequins. 

"Um… Mabel?" 

"Check it out!" Mabel exclaimed brightly. "After a lot of practice and wasted sequins, I finally managed to successfully bedazzle my face! It's just a little hard to blink though…" She did so, wincing as several sequins bounced off her eyelids. 

"Is that… permanent?" Dipper asked, frowning. 

"I sure hope so!"

At that exact moment, the doorbell happened to ring. Stan's voice rang out gruffly from the kitchen right after it. "Somebody answer the door!" he shouted, too busy or lazy or both to do it himself. 

"Oh, that must be Steven!" Mabel grinned, excited to get her first ukulele lesson underway. "I'll get it!" She hurried for the door, expecting to find Steven standing on the other side. Except, when she flung it open, someone much smaller was standing there instead. 

"Howdy!" Gideon greeted with a cheerful smile. 

"Oh my gosh!" Mabel gasped, beaming. "It's 'widdle ol' you'!"

"Heh, yeah, my song's quite catchy," Gideon chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "Now, pardon me if I'm a bit bold here, since I know we haven't formally met, but after yesterday's performance, I just couldn't get your laugh out of my head!"

"You mean this one?" Mabel let out a loud, almost obnoxious laugh. One that Gideon was completely charmed by. 

"Oh, what a delight!" he practically squeaked. "When I saw you in the audience, I said to myself, 'Now, there's a kindred spirit. Someone who appreciates the more… sparkly things in life.'"

"You got that right!" Mabel agreed. Her smile soon slipped into a cough as she choked on some of the sequins she accidentally swallowed earlier. A few of them landed on the lapel of Gideon's suit, making it even flashier than it already was. 

"Enchanting…" Gideon whispered in captivated awe. "Utterly enchanting."

"Who's at the door!?" Stan shouted from inside the house. Remembering just how clear he'd made his disdain for Gideon yesterday, Mabel was quick to cover for him. 

"No one, Grunkle Stan!"

"I'm much obliged for your discretion," Gideon said, his voice low just in case. "Stan's no fan of mine. I don't know how a lemon so sour could be related to a peach so sweet."

"Oh, stop it, you!" Mabel giggled. 

"What do you say we step away from here and get better acquainted?" Gideon offered. "Perhaps in my… dressing room?"

"You have a dressing room?" Mabel asked, amazed. "We could give each other makeovers! Oh, but hold on… I was waiting for Steven to come over so he could teach me to play the ukulele! In fact, he should be here any minute now…"

"Oh…" Gideon frowned. Mabel didn't notice his hands starting to ball up into tight fists at his sides the second she so much as mentioned Steven's name. "Well, if you're expecting company, then I understand. I'll suppose I'll just be on my way then…"

Mabel bit her lip as she watched Gideon slowly turn to leave. He'd come out all this way, just to see her; with that in mind, she couldn't very well turn him away so quickly, could she? "Gideon, wait!" she called out after him. "I… I'm sure Steven won't mind," she forced a smile on, trying her best not to glance up at the nearby temple. "Besides, he can just hang out with my brother until I get back, so… makeovers, here we come!"

"Why, yes indeed!" Gideon perked up as Mabel hurried to follow him. He flashed a discreet, almost snide grin up at the temple as they passed by it. For as much as the Crystal Gems may have in their arsenal, he knew that he'd won an important victory against their youngest member. The first of hopefully many more. "Yes indeed…"

Steven frowned as he glanced up at the clock again. He'd arrived at the shack quite some time ago, only to find that Mabel wasn't there for their first ukulele lesson. As confusing as that was, he decided to stick around to wait for her, passing the time by watching TV with Dipper. 

"When do you think she'll be back?" Steven asked. The last thing he wanted to be was impatient, and yet, he couldn't help but be a bit restless as minutes began to pass on into hours. 

"I don't know…" Dipper said, making no effort to hide his growing worry. "It's not like Mabel to be gone for so long. All she did was answer the door this morning and she hasn't been around since."

"You don't think something's happened to her, do you?" Steven asked, aptly concerned. 

Before Dipper could even try to answer, the front door burst open, putting a quick end to both boys' fears. "As if on cue…" he smirked as Mabel happily bounded into the den. 

"Hey, guys!" she greeted, proudly showing off her 'makeover'. Her done-up hair was stiff with copious amounts of hairspray, her face painted with makeup, and her nails sharply manicured as she waved them about. "What's goin' on?"

"Wow, Mabel!" Steven exclaimed, impressed. "You look great!"

"Thanks!" Mabel laughed. "I gotta admit, this is even better than bedazzling my face!"

"Mabel, where have you been?" Dipper asked, confused. "And what's going on with those nails? You look like a wolverine."

"I know, right?" Mabel let out a playful roar as she pawed at the air. "I was just hanging out with my new pal, Gideon. I gotta say, he is one dapper little man!"

"Wait, you were with Gideon all this time?" Steven asked. "But… I thought you wanted me to teach you the ukulele…"

"Oh, well of course I do!" Mabel quickly assured. "But Gideon invited me over, and I didn't really want to turn him down since he's so nice! You're not mad, are you, Steven?"

"No," Steven shook his head. "We can always start our lessons later. I mean, you were just out having fun, right?"

"I sure was! Gideon's the best! We talked about all sorts of stuff, like unicorns and summer fashions and he even did my hair!" 

"Mabel, what would Grunkle Stan say if he found out you were hanging around with his biggest rival?" Dipper asked warily.

"Well, he's not gonna find out, 'cause you're not gonna tell him, right ?" Mabel shot her brother a pointed, pleading look. 

"I guess not, but still, I don't trust anyone who's hair is bigger than their head."

"Oh, leave him alone!" Mabel huffed defensively. "You never wanna do girly stuff with me! You and Soos get to do boy stuff together all the time!"

"What do you mean?" Dipper asked. Before Mabel could even answer though, Soos poked his head into the room, a packet of hot dogs in hand.

"Yo, dude, you ready to blow up these hot dogs in the microwave one by one?" 

"Am I!" Dipper excitedly jumped to his feet. "Aren't you coming, Steven?"

"Uh… nah…" Steven frowned as he watched Mabel turn away, crossing her arms. "You guys go on ahead without me."

"Whatever you say, dude," Soos shrugged as he and Dipper rushed into the kitchen and began watching the hot dogs explode, laughing all the while. 

"Ugh," Mabel rolled her eyes. "Do you see what I have to put up with, Steven?"

"Mabel, I'm sorry if you're feeling left out," Steven said with an earnest frown. "I know how hard that can be; the Gems leave me out of a lot of things too."

"See? You get it!" Mabel sighed as she took a seat next to him. "And so does Gideon. It's so nice to finally hang out with someone who's into a lot of the same stuff I am. Sorta like you, Steven." She gasped, gripping Steven's arm as a newfound idea struck her. "Oh my gosh, you should totally come with us some time!"

"Uh… yeah, maybe," Steven said with a small, halfhearted smile. "A-anyway, it's getting kinda late. I'm gonna be on a mission with the Gems tomorrow, but… how does Wednesday sound for your first ukulele lesson instead? We can do it up at the temple, and we can have snacks and everything!" 

Mabel sighed again, this time out of relief that there were no hard feelings between her and Steven. She couldn't help but think about how lucky she was, to be able to keep a friend as good and as kind as him, all while making another one like Gideon. "That sounds perfect," she said, determined not to let him down again.

The sun sank low over Gravity Falls, casting a lazy warm glow on the sleepy little town. Mabel and Gideon took in this stunning view from atop the factory where the latter's popular merchandise was stored. After a day of shopping and even more makeovers, the pair of newfound friends had decided to bring their adventures to a relaxing end as they enjoyed the sunset together. 

"Whoa, the view from your family's factory is nuts!" Mabel exclaimed with an amazed smile. "It's a good thing we both brought our…"

"Opera glasses!" They both pulled their glasses out, using them to peer at each other as they shared a warm laugh. 

"Ok, but seriously though, this view is incredible," Mabel said, still grinning. "You can see the whole town from up here! And I don't think I've ever been able to look down at the Gem temple before!"

"Aw, that silly ol' temple ain't nothing special," Gideon said, quickly changing the subject. "You know, Mabel, when I'm up here lookin' down at all those little ol' people, I feel like I'm the king of all I survey." He briefly dropped his voice down into a whisper as an almost sinister smile claimed his face. "I guess that makes you my queen, huh?"

"What?" Mabel chuckled, not taking him seriously. "You are being so nice to me right now! Quit it!"

"I can't quit it," Gideon's tone suddenly turned sincere. "I am speaking from the heart."

"From the where-now?" Mabel asked, her smile fading just the slightest bit.

"Mabel, I must admit, I've never felt this close with anyone," Gideon reached out to stroke Mabel's hair, despite her growing discomfort. "So, so close…"

"Uh… Gideon, listen," Mabel began as she pushed his hand away. He was quick to reach for it again, only for her to stop him again, a bit more insistently this time. "I like you a lot, I really do, but… maybe we should just be friends…"

"At least give me a chance," Gideon said. "Mabel, will you do me the honor of going on a date with me?"

"A play date?" Mabel asked apprehensively.

"Uh uh."

"A shopping date?"

"Uh uh. It'll just be one lil' ol' date. I swear on my lucky bolo tie," Gideon gripped said tie, which almost seemed to shine in the light of the setting sun. 

"Well…" Mabel hesitated. Her first impulse was to say no, to let him down gently and hope that things wouldn't be too awkward between them from here on out. But at the same time all he was asking for was a single, simple date. She owed him that much, after how much fun she'd had with him these past two days. And besides, what's the worst that could happen? "Okay, then… I guess one date wouldn't be so bad…"

"Mabel Pines, you have just made me the happiest boy in the world!" Gideon caught her off guard with a sudden hug. She awkwardly returned it, only to notice something that made her regret saying yes, even if she knew she couldn't take it back now. 

"Wait… Are you sniffing my hair?"

Though Mabel had hoped her "date" with Gideon would be laid back and lowkey, he didn't seem to get the memo. Instead, he showed up at the shack atop a magnificent white stallion, which they rode off to the fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town. Even more than that, Gideon had reserved the most lavish booth in the place as the waiters strived to fulfill his every last request. 

"Havin' a good time, Mabel?" Gideon offered her a flirtatious grin. "Cause I know I am…"

"Um… sure…" Mabel said, averting his gaze. "I can't believe they let us bring a horse in here!"

Sure enough, the horse they'd rode here on was currently drinking out of the elegant fountain at the center of the restaurant, without anyone even attempting to stop it. "What can I say?" Gideon propped his feet up on the table. "People have a hard time sayin' no to me…"

"Ah, Monsieur Gideon! Ze feet on ze table! An excellent choice!" the waiter complimented as he came by to refill their waters.

"Jean Luc, what did we discuss about eye contact?" Gideon shot him a cold glare.

"Yes, yes! Very good!" the waiter immediately looked away as he left the table with a wide, compliant grin. 

Gideon quickly perked back up as he turned back to Mabel, throwing on another broad, charming smile. "You know, Mabel, I can't recall the last time I've had such a delightful time on a date."

"You've been on dates before?" Mabel asked skeptically. After all, Gideon was a year or two younger than she was; and despite her own longing for a fantastical summer romance, she'd never really been on anything resembling a date herself. Until now, she supposed. 

"Well… not traditionally…" Gideon admitted with a shrug. "But I hardly think that lil' detail matters. After all, it only makes this first date all the more… special , don't you agree?"

"Uh…" Mabel trailed off, not liking what he was hinting at. But as their food arrived, he decided to double down on it, much to her growing dismay. 

"As far as I'm concerned, tonight's date is turning out to be a complete success! And tomorrow's date promises to top this one in every way!"

"Whoa, whoa, what?" Mabel cut in. "You said just one date, and this was it."

Gideon's smile didn't slip as he changed the subject seemingly out of nowhere. "Hark! What a surprise! A red-crested South American rainbow macaw!" That very bird abruptly flew in, startling Mabel as it landed on Gideon's arm. With a snap of his fingers, the bird delivered its rehearsed message loud and clear. 

"Mabel! Will! You! Accompany! Gideon! To the! Ballroom! Dance! This! Websday—Wednesday!" The bird quickly corrected its error after Gideon gave it a shake. With that, it hacked up an invitation to the event onto Mabel's plate and flew away just as suddenly as it had arrived. 

For a moment, Mabel could only sit there at a complete loss for words. She was more than ready to gently turn him down, hoping to put a polite end to his romantic pursuits once and for all. That is until she noticed a growing crowd surrounding their table, full of folks just as eager to hear her say yes as Gideon was. 

"So Mabel?" he asked. He sent a knowing nod to the anticipating patrons, all but playing up the fact that there were so many eyes on them. 

Under the weight of so much pressure, Mabel struggled to say much of anything at all. Though she'd started this summer seeking some kind of sweeping romance, this was far from what she'd had in mind. While he was nice and she did enjoy hanging out with him, Gideon wasn't quite what she considered to be "boyfriend material". And as painfully awkward as it may be, she figured she may as well tell him as much before this could get any more out of hand than it already was. 

"Gideon," she began as evenly as she could. "I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to say…" She drew in an anxious breath as whatever she wanted to say was lost when she stole another glance at the hopeful crowd. If there was one thing Mabel hated, it was disappointing anyone, especially so many people all at once. Fortunately though, she remembered wouldn't have to. "I can't. At least… not tomorrow."

"Oh? And why ever not?" Gideon asked. The crowd, meanwhile, slowly dispersed with a round of dissatisfied sighs. Mabel tried her best to tune them out as she explained. 

"I-I promised Steven I would hang out with him tomorrow," she said, putting on a small, wavering smile. "You know him, right?"

"Ah, yes…" Gideon grinned a bit too widely, a bit too forcefully. "Young Steven Universe… I sure do know 'im, and those curious compatriots of his, the Crystal Gems." He let his smile fall into a concerned facade, catching Mabel off guard as his tone turned suddenly serious. "Ya know, Mabel, I'd be… careful hangin' around them folks so much if I were you."

"Uh… what do you mean?"

"I mean, those Gems are magnets for all sorts of trouble," Gideon let out a haughty huff. "Dangerous monsters, mysterious artifacts–why, I'd bet anything that menacing eye in the sky the other day had somethin' to do with 'em!"

"W-well…" Mabel trailed off anxiously. 

"Oh, but listen to me go on," Gideon played his bitterness off with a blatantly fake chuckle. "Forgive me for gettin' a lil' paranoid there. I just don't wanna see anything happen to ya." Mabel winced, unable to pull her hand back in time before Gideon put his over it. "If I could offer any advice, I think, perhaps, it'd be in your best interest if you steered clear of Steven and those Gems. For your own safety. You understand, don'tcha, Mabel?"

"Um…" Mabel slipped her hand away, running it through her hair. While almost every part of her wanted to defend Steven and the Gems against Gideon's cold claims, once again, she found herself struggling to say how she really felt when she needed to most. "Y-yeah, ok," she lied once, before just as quickly doing it again. "But… I still can't do another date on Wednesday. I'll be busy with… o-other stuff. So much stuff. In fact, there's so much stuff I can't even begin to list all the stuff because it'd just be waaaaay too much stuff, that's how much stuff there is!" 

"Well now, don't worry none about it," Gideon laughed warmly. "After all, we can just push it on over to Thursday evenin', simple as that."

"Oh, y-yeah…" Mabel smiled to cover a cringe. "Thursday… sounds… great." 

"Excellent!" he proclaimed, clearly delighted. "To me and my darlin' Mabel! The happiest couple this side of Gravity Falls!" Gideon held his glass of sparkling water up, calling the rest of the restaurant to a toast. One that Mabel couldn't bear to take part of as she felt the walls starting to close in all around her, forming a painfully awkward prison she was powerless to escape from.

The second Stan saw the shocking photo plastered on the front page of the Gravity Falls Gossiper the next morning, he knew he needed answers. And that's exactly what he demanded out of Dipper, Soos, and Wendy the next morning as he barged into the gift shop in a furious tirade. 

"Hey!" he practically shouted, startling the trio as they started their shift. "What the heck is Mabel doing in the paper next to that crazy pickpocket Gideon?! I thought I told her to stay away from him!"

"Oh yeah," Wendy said, pulling up even more photos of the "couple" on her phone. "It's like a big deal. Everyone's talking about Gideon and Mabel's big date tomorrow night."

"WHAT?!" Stan exclaimed, baffled. "That little shyster's dating my niece?!"

"I wonder what the new name for the power couple will be," Soos pondered. "Mabideon? Gideabel? Or what about Magidbeleon!?"

"Dipper, did you know about this?" Stan asked his nephew, still fuming. 

"N-no!" Dipper quickly, anxiously lied. "I didn't hear a thing about it! Plus, I told her not to!"

"Well, where is she now? I swear if she's with that little weasel, I'm gonna-"

"She's not," Dipper cut in before Stan could finish. "She's up at the temple hanging out with Steven for the day."

"Hm, well I'd rather her be up there than with Gideon of all people," Stan scowled as he pulled his suit jacket over his shoulders. "This all ends today . I'm going down to that little skunk's house and putting a stop to this right now!"

Without another word, Stan stormed out of the house, shattering the speed limit as he drove straight to the Gleeful residence in the suburbs. As soon as he arrived, he wasted no time banging on the front door, making a point of knocking the knit sign reading 'pardon this garden' clean off of it. 

"I will pardon nothing !" he snapped as he pounded on the door again. "Gideon, you little punk! Open up!"

Instead of being met with his longtime rival, Gideon's father, Bud opened the door instead. Despite the rage practically radiating off of Stan, he met it with a friendly, downright cordial grin instead. "Why, Stanford Pines! What a delight!"

"Out of the way, Bud!" Stan pushed his way into the house. "I'm looking for Gideon! I have a bone to pick with him!"

"Well, I haven't seen the boy around lately, but since you're here, you simply must sit down for some coffee!" Bud kindly offered as he guided Stan into the den.

"B-but I came-"

"It's imported! All the way from Columbia!"

Stan paused, suddenly enticed. "Columbia, huh? I went to jail there once." Only now as his anger began to subside, was he finally able to notice just how spacious and well-decorated the Gleeful residence really was. "Wow, these are some nice digs ya got here." He whistled as he took it all in a detailed painting of a sad clown hanging from the wall. "Oh this? This is beautiful ."

"Well, thank ya very much," Bud chuckled as he handed Stan a piping cup of coffee. "Now, I hear that your niece and my Gideon are, well, they're singin' in harmony lately, so to speak."

"Uh, yeah," Stan forced a scowl back onto his face. "And I'm against it."

"Aw, no, no, no!" Bud shook his head. "I hardly see this as a bad thing, Stanford! In fact, I see it as a fantastic business opportunity!"

"…Huh?"

"Yes, the Mystery Shack and the Tent of Telepathy," Bud explained "Gravity Falls' premiere purveyors of the supernatural! We've been at each other's throats for far too long now, yes we have. But don't you see? This could be our big chance to set aside our rivalry and… pool our collective profits, you know?"

Stan's eyes widened at such a tantalizing offer. In fact, it was so tantalizing that it practically erased every remaining ounce of hatred he may have harbored toward Gideon altogether. After all, if there was any way to profit from this, then he wasn't about to turn that chance down; no matter who he might have to work alongside to get it. "I'm listening…"

"Ok, so let's start with the easiest cord of them all, a C," Steven instructed, demonstrating where to put his hands so Mabel could see. She followed suit on the spare ukulele Steven was lending her for the sake of their lessons and it wasn't long before a pair of C cords rang out through the temple house. "That's perfect!" Steven cheered. "You're doing great so far, Mabel!"

"Steven, you've only taught me one cord," Mabel laughed. With just how stressed everything even remotely related to Gideon had her lately, she couldn't deny just how good it really felt. 

"Yeah, but that cord is the first step to so many songs!" 

At the same time, Garnet stepped in from the kitchen, toting a plate a tray of warm, freshly-baked treats for the pair to enjoy. "Cookies are done."

"Thanks, Garnet!" Steven gladly took one. "Your cookies are the best ! What's your secret anyway?"

"They're made with lots of love," Garnet smiled, mysteriously adjusting her shades. "And just a bit of vanilla."

With that, she headed back into the kitchen to make another batch. Not that Steven thought they'd need too many more when he noticed Mabel hadn't touched a single cookie, even though there were plenty of them. "Uh, don't you want some, Mabel?" he handed one of the treats to her with a small, encouraging smile. "I thought you loved cookies."

"I do…" she sighed, staring down at the ukulele in her hands. "I'm just… not super hungry right now…"

Despite his best efforts, the smile Steven had been trying to uphold all afternoon finally slipped. He'd picked up on Mabel's more than clear melancholy almost as soon as she arrived for her lesson. And after trying to break her out of it all day, he decided it was finally time to get to the bottom of it. "Ok, something's wrong here," he put his instrument aside to focus on her instead. "You don't want cookies, you haven't laughed at any of my music puns, and you didn't even hug Lion when you first came in! Are you feeling ok? 'Cause you sure don't seem ok…"

"I am ok," Mabel said, but even she didn't believe herself. "It's just… well…" She looked away from Steven as Gideon's almost ominous warnings from the previous night hung in the back of her mind. Nothing about what he'd said sat right with her, not because she believed him, but because she didn't . Steven and the Gems weren't dangerous; they were heroes who protected the town from all kinds of harm. If there was anyone she could trust, it was them–she could trust him . After everything they'd already been through together this summer, Steven had already more than proved that and then some. 

"It's Gideon," she let out the breath she'd been holding. "I went out to dinner with him last night, even though I really didn't want to go. And when he asked me out again tomorrow night, I didn't know how to say no! It's like I'm trapped in this big old loop of really weird dates and I just can't get out of it, no matter what I do!"

"So… what's the problem?" Steven asked, confused. "I thought you liked hanging out with Gideon."

"I do!" Mabel protested. "But not like that ! I like Gideon, but only as a friend/little sister! But I can't just turn him down and break his heart after he's been so nice to me, even if he is sorta clingy and creepy. I just need things to go back to the way they used to be. You know, friends."

"Have you tried telling him any of this?"

"It's not that easy," Mabel groaned into a throw pillow. "Every time I try to work up the nerve to break things off with him, I get this icky, guilty feeling in my gut that forces me not to say no! I don't know what I'm gonna do! I have no way out!"

"Hm…" Steven pondered the problem for a moment. While he wasn't well-versed in situations like this, he decided to turn to someone who was far wiser than he could ever hope to be. "Hey, Garnet! Mabel needs help with-"

"I heard," Garnet said, emerging from the kitchen. 

"So, uh, any advice?" Mabel asked, hopeful. "I bet you, Amethyst, and Pearl deal with unwanted admirers all the time, since all three of you are super pretty."

"We deal with them sometimes," Garnet took a seat on the couch alongside the kids. "But we never let it get that far."

"I wish I had done that…" Mabel muttered, remorseful. 

"Mabel," Garnet placed a hand on the girl's shoulder. "The best advice I can give you is to just be honest with Gideon about how you really feel. It's not fair for you to lead him on, and it's not fair for you to force yourself to keep doing something you don't want to do. It may not be easy, and it may not feel good at first, but chances are it will be better for you both in the long run. Trust me."

"You make it sound so simple ," Mabel sighed, still apprehensive. "But… you're right. I guess I've finally gotta come clean. I just hope he doesn't take it too hard."

"Things will turn out fine," Garnet encouraged. "You'll see."

"Wow, Garnet," Steven said, impressed. "I didn't know you knew so much about relationships! You're like a romance master!"

Garnet stood, smirking as she turned back to the kitchen. "I guess you could say that…" she said, shifting her shades once more. 

"Well, that's that," Mabel took in a deep, resolved breath. "All I've gotta do now is tell Gideon the truth and go from there."

"Don't worry," Steven assured, smiling. "It'll all work out, just like Garnet said."

"Right," Mabel agreed, choosing to believe that. For as awkward and unfamiliar as the situation she was facing was, she couldn't help but be glad to have such sound support from the likes of Steven and Garnet to help see her through it. "Ok. Enough moping outta this Mabel!" she perked up, grabbing a cookie as she reclaimed her ukulele. "Are you gonna teach me how to play this thing or not?"

"You bet!" Steven chuckled, more than ready to get the lesson going again. As they did, Mabel was more than happy to let her lasting worries fall by the wayside, at least for a little while. And when she was with someone like Steven, that was easier to do than it was with almost anyone else.

"Hey," Dipper greeted Mabel as she skipped the shack's den that evening, wearing a wide, easygoing smile on her face. "You look like you're in a good mood. What happened? Did you finally break things off with Gideon?'

"Not yet," Mabel replied "But never you fear, bro-bro. I plan on doing exactly that tomorrow night."

"You're not going to flake out and not tell him again, are you?" Dipper asked, skeptical.

"Nope," Mabel shook her head, smiling. "I got some pretty great advice from Garnet. She told me that the best thing to do is just tell Gideon the truth. So that's exactly what I'm gonna do."

"Well, hopefully he'll take it better than Stan did when he found out you and Gideon went out on a date."

"What?!" Mabel gasped, shooting her brother an appalled look. "I thought you said you weren't gonna tell him!" 

"I didn't," Dipper corrected. "He found out on his own and so he went over to Gideon's to straighten him out. He's been gone for several hours now, so it's probably safe to assume that he's been arrested by now."

"Wait a minute…" Mabel said, her eyes widening in realization. "That's it! If Grunkle Stan tells Gideon it's over, then that means I won't have to! He's doing all of the work for me! This is great!" 

"I thought you said you were going to tell him the truth."

"Hey, why put myself out there if I don't have to? I should have let Grunkle Stan know about this from the beginning! I owe him big time for this!"

"You sure do, kid!" Stan proclaimed as he entered the den. Mabel spun around to face him more than ready to give him a grateful hug, though she froze when she noticed the tee-shirt he was wearing, with the words "Team Gideon" printed plainly on it.

"Um… Grunkle Stan?" 

"Mabel, I have some great news for you!" Stan began with a proud grin.

"Uh… is it that you told Gideon he's not allowed to see me anymore?" Mabel asked hopefully, anxiously. 

"What?" Stan scoffed. "No! The good news is that you're going to have to marry Gideon."

"WHAT?!" Mabel practically shrieked, shocked. 

"It's all part of the long term deal I just made with Bud Gleeful," Stan explained. "There's a lot of cash tied up in this thing, so don't blow it for me."

"B-but I-" 

"Plus this merger has some immediate benefits too. Like this shirt!" his smile faded as he glanced down at the shirt, noticing how it emphasized his bulging stomach. "Ugh, I am fat ."

Unable to contain her rising horror for another second, Mabel let out a shrill, distraught scream. That scream continued echoing through the shack as she ran upstairs, with Dipper leaving a very confused Stan behind as he hurried up after her. 

"Bodies change, kids!" he shouted, before ultimately sighing, forlorn. "Bodies change…"

It didn't take long for Dipper to find Mabel once he got to the attic. He'd seen her like this plenty of times before, sitting on the floor with her knees pulled to her chest and her face buried deep into the collar of her sweater. And as a result, he knew exactly how bad this really was. 

"Oh no…" he frowned as he took a seat on the floor next to her. "Mabel-"

"Mabel's not here," she muttered bitterly. "She's in sweater town."

"Are you going to come out of sweater town?"

Mabel simply shook her head with a tiny, plaintiff squeak. Even so, Dipper put a consoling hand on her shoulder in an attempt at coaxing her out of her sweatered shelter. "Don't listen to Stan. You can always just end things with Gideon yourself, just like you said you were going to."

"That's what I thought, but I can't !" Mabel let out a mostly muffled wail. "Talking about it is one thing, but doing it? That's totally different! I don't wanna hurt Gideon's feelings like I know I'm going to if I go through with this!"

"So… what?" Dipper asked. "You're just gonna keep dating him forever then?"

"Ew, no!" Mabel hugged herself even tighter. "I just… Ugh! I don't know what to do!"

As soon as Dipper heard Mabel bite back what almost sounded like a sob, he knew exactly what he needed to do. It may not have been the most conventional solution, but if there was even a chance that it could pull his sister out of such a miserable state, it would be more than worth it. "Alright, enough is enough. If you can't break up with Gideon, then don't worry. I'll do it for you."

"Y-you will?" Mabel asked, finally pulling her face out of her sweater a little. 

"Of course," Dipper nodded, grinning. "And if it makes you feel any better, I'll even take Steven with me. Between the two of us, this will be a piece of cake."

In an instant, Mabel was out of sweater town, nearly knocking her brother to the ground as she locked him in a tight, grateful hug. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" she exclaimed, elated and relieved. "Have I ever told you that you're the best brother ever ?!"

"You could stand to say it more often…" Dipper said, smirking. He let her have the playful punch on the arm she gave him in retaliation for all the stress she'd been putting herself through lately. Stress that, if all went according to plan, would come to a quick and easy end.

"Wait, so… why are we doing this instead of Mabel again?" Steven asked as he and Dipper arrived at the crowded restaurant the following night. It didn't take long for them to spot Gideon, eagerly awaiting Mabel at the largest table near the back so their next "date" could get underway. The very date the boys had come here to dismantle before it could even start. 

"She has a hard time letting people down–always has," Dipper explained. "So I figured this would be a better way to get her out of this mess without any strings attached."

"Yeah, but… Garnet told her she needed to be honest with Gideon," Steven noted, frowning. 

"It is being honest. What we're gonna tell him is still coming from Mabel, even if she's not the one saying it."

"I guess…" 

"So have you ever really talked to Gideon before?" Dipper asked, curiously eyeing the young psychic from afar. 

"Not a ton," Steven admitted, shrugging. "But he seems nice enough from how he acts in his shows, and he really does seem to like Mabel, so… maybe this won't be as hard as she thought."

"Here's hoping," Dipper said as they approached Gideon's table. As preoccupied as he was with his menu, he didn't notice either of them, until Steven cleared his throat to catch the younger boy's attention. 

"Um… Hi, Gideon," he greeted with a small, awkward smile.

Gideon lowered his menu, clearly caught off guard to see the pair standing there in Mabel's stead. "Oh, well look who it is!" he exclaimed, grinning. "Dipper Pines and Steven Universe! What a pleasant surprise! Tell me, Steven, how are those magical colleagues of yours doin'?"

"You mean the Gems?" Steven asked. "They're fine, I guess."

"Very good, very good," Gideon nodded, his smile sharpening just the slightest bit. "So, have either of you boys seen Mabel around? It's high time for our date to get in motion."

"Um, yeah… Look, Gideon," Dipper began, frowning. "Here's the thing. Mabel… isn't joining you tonight. To be honest, she, uh… she doesn't wanna see you anymore. She's… Well, she's kinda weirded out by you, no offense."

"She was going to tell you herself," Steven added. "But she didn't want to hurt your feelings. She just thinks it would be better for both of you if you went your separate ways. You understand, right?"

A beat of uncomfortable silence passed between the trio. Steven and Dipper exchanged a fretful glance, both of them missing as Gideon's eye twitched in thinly-veiled anger. "So…" he began, his voice low and unstable. "What you're sayin' is… you've… come between us?"

"You're not like, gonna freak out, or anything, are you?" Dipper asked warily. 

To the boys' shared surprise, Gideon quickly cooled down as he picked his former cordial grin back up without skipping a beat. "Oh heavens, no!" he assured warmly. "These things happen, after all. Bygones, you know."

"Are you sure you're gonna be ok?" Steven asked, concerned nonetheless. 

"Oh, don't you worry yourself over lil' ol me," Gideon's grin widened to an almost unnatural degree. "I'll be more than fine, I assure you."

"Okay, cool," Dipper said, allayed. "Again, we're sorry, man, but uh… thumbs up, huh?"

With nothing else really left to say, Steven and Dipper decided to take their leave. While they both offered him a final set of awkward smiles, neither of them noticed Gideon's own fall away the second their backs were turned. Neither of them noticed how it swiftly transformed into a bitter, downright hateful glare. "Thumbs up indeed, my friends… "

At the same time, Mabel held her post just outside of the restaurant, anxiously awaiting the boys' return. She couldn't hold back a huge sigh of relief when she spotted them, apparently unharmed and even better yet, in good spirits. "So? How'd it go? Was he mad? Did he try to read your minds with his psychic powers?"

"Actually, he took it pretty well," Steven said. "Better than we expected him to, anyway."

"Oh, good," Mabel eased up. "I was afraid he might go totally crazy on you guys or something."

"Don't worry, Mabel," Dipper assured. "He's just a kid. He doesn't have any 'psychic powers' or anything like that."

"…I guess you're right," Mabel chuckled, finally letting herself relax. 

"So now that all that's out of the way, you guys wanna come hang out at the temple for a while?" Steven suggested. "We still have plenty of Garnet's cookies left over from yesterday!"

Neither twin was about to turn such an enticing offer down. The three of them cheerfully raced off towards the temple, heedless of the danger they had just gotten themselves into. Of the downright dangerous wrath their seemingly innocent actions had just incurred.

Gideon paced around his darkened room later that night, his footfalls heavy and harsh. As the town's most beloved medium, if there was one thing he wasn't used to, it was being told no, especially when it came to something he wanted this much. And, with no need to save face in front of anyone now, he had no problems letting his true fury flow toward the pair that had told him no in the first place. 

"Steven Universe, Dipper Pines, you have no idea what you've just done!" Gideon growled, throwing his fist down on his desk. "If you two think you can keep me 'n my precious Mabel apart, then ya'll got another thing comin'!" 

As enraged as he was, Gideon wasn't one to give up so easily. Especially not when he had a certain secret weapon on his side, one that would be more than enough to put both of his newfound foes in their place. 

"So, one of them darn Crystal Gems thinks he can steal somethin' from me, huh?" he sneered hatefully. His scowl quickly shifted into a sinister smile as he claimed his bolo tie off the table, watching with twisted glee as an eerie glow enveloped the charm. "Well, I already beat ya at your own game, Universe! And as soon as I get my hands on even more magical Gem dohickeys, nobody, not even you and your high and mighty friends, will be able to stop me!"

With a mere wave of his hand, he called upon the artifact's incredible power. Its teal glow transferred to his hand first, then to the furniture surrounding him. Under the artifact's spell, the objects began to float, following Gideon's command as he threw them down in show of destructive might. 

"Look out, boys," Gideon smirked as his devious, deadly plan solidified. "You'll rue the day you ever tried gettin' in my way…" 

"Gideon Charles Gleeful!" Bud scolded as he poked his head into the room, only to find the absolute mess Gideon had just made. "Clean up your room this instant!"

"I CAN BUY AND SELL YOU, OLD MAN!" Gideon viciously snapped back at him. 

Bud was silent, just for a moment. But under his son's infamous temper, he was quick to fold and leave the boy to his usual devices, no matter how wicked they may have been. "...Fair enough."

"Okay, dudes. Hit me."

At that, Dipper and Mabel charged straight at Soos. Both of them bounced off his padded stomach as they collided with the pillow under his shirt, laughing as they fell back onto the ground.

"Huh, feels good," Soos noted, surprised. 

"This is so nice," Mabel let out a relaxed sigh as she lay back on the ground.. "I'm so glad everything's finally back to normal."

"Well, as normal as things get around here," Dipper said, grinning. 

"I'm serious. I don't have to be all stressy about Gideon at all anymore, and I have you and Steven to thank for that, bro-bro!"

"Eh, don't worry about it. I know you would have done the same for me."

"Ha!" Mabel laughed. "As if you could even get a date in the first place!"

Dipper rolled his eyes, but before he could offer any kind of comeback, the phone suddenly rang from inside the shack. "Your turn!" both twins exclaimed in near unison. However, since Dipper was just a second too slow to the punch, the task ultimately fell to him. Mabel stuck her tongue out at him as he trudged inside to answer, leaving her and Soos to continue enjoying the calm of the early evening. 

"You know, Soos," Mabel began, standing. "I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but I could get used to this whole being single thing. I mean, unless any cute boys come along who aren't lowkey weird and pushy like Gideon was."

"Hm…" Soos pondered for a moment as his gaze drifted up to the temple. "What about Steven?"

"What about him?"

"I dunno," Soos shrugged. "You dudes have a lot in common; I may not know a whole lot about romance, but you two could make a pretty cool couple, I think."

"Whaaaaat?" Mabel couldn't help but laugh. "Don't be silly, Soos! Sure, Steven may be super nice and funny and he's as big of a Crying Breakfast Friends fan as I am, but we're just friends! And I've seen enough teen rom coms to know you don't date your friends."

"Wow…" Soos said, intrigued. "I didn't know teen rom coms were filled with such vast wisdom. I should totally watch more of them."

" Everyone should," Mabel concluded with a confident grin. At the same time, Dipper emerged from the shack, an excited smile on his face as he raced past the pair. 

"Yo, dude," Soos called out after him. "Where you goin' in such a hurry?"

"The town paper just called," Dipper only paused for a moment to explain. "They wanna interview me about all of the weird stuff we've noticed in Gravity Falls since we got here. Can you believe it? I could fill the whole paper with all of the crazy things I've seen so far!"

"Or you could just fill it with how you're a huge dork!" Mabel teased.

Dipper didn't waste time arguing with her, not when there was something far more important waiting for him. "Anyway, I'll be back later. Don't wait up!"

Mabel saw her brother off with a wave before turning back to Soos with a daring grin. "Okay, Soos. Get ready for round two!"

Soos tapped his pillow-shielded stomach, just as prepared as she was for another direct strike. "Dude, I'm always ready."

Dipper frowned, confused as he looked between the address he had written down and the place it had led him to. An apparently abandoned factory nestled atop a cliff on the far end of town was an odd place to conduct an interview. Still, he figured that it was just a more spacious place for the reporter to get better pictures of him for the paper. Or at least that's what he would have thought if he'd been the only one to show up at the warehouse's entrance.

"Steven?" he called, surprised when he spotted the other boy from afar. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, hey, Dipper," Steven greeted with a smile. "Are you here for the free ice cream too?"

"Ice cream?"

"Yeah! I got a call a little while ago about there being a free sundae bar here, and since the Gems aren't back from their mission yet, I figured I'd come check it out. But…" Steven's smile dropped as he glanced at the factory doors before them. "This is kind of weird. I thought there'd be way more people here if free sundaes were involved. Maybe I showed up too late?" 

"Um… I think you might have the wrong place, Steven," Dipper pointed out. "I'm here for an interview for the town paper; they didn't mention anything about free ice cream."

"Wait, really?" Steven raised an eyebrow. "Um… maybe the town paper is giving out the ice cream too and they just didn't tell you?"

"Somehow, I highly doubt that," Dipper deadpanned. "I guess there's only one way to figure out what's actually going on here…"

Steven nodded, pushing the doors open to reveal the dark, largely empty warehouse. The boys exchanged a dubious glance as they stepped inside, finding only boxes and crates instead of reporters or ice cream awaiting either of them. 

"Um… hello?" Steven's voice echoed through the factory. "Is anybody here?"

"Well, Steven, I think it's safe to say we've both been set up," Dipper crossed his arms as Steven went unanswered. "I don't get it though. Who would tell us to come all the way out here for nothing?"

As if on cue, the lights lining the high ceiling suddenly switched on as the doors slammed shut behind the boys. They turned, both of them pulling on the doors, only to find that they'd somehow locked themselves up tight, leaving them all but trapped. As startling as that was, they soon found that they weren't as alone as they initially thought they were as a distinct southern drawl offered them an icy greeting.

"Hello, friends… "

"Ugh…" Dipper groaned, annoyed as he and Steven turned back to face the younger boy. "Gideon…"

"Are you here for the free sundaes too?" Steven asked with a small, wavering smile.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry, Steven," Gideon's voice dripped with sarcasm. "But there ain't any free ice cream here…"

"So then why are we here?" Dipper asked with a knowing, distrustful scowl.

"Dipper Pines…" Gideon begins. As he spoke, the shadows on his chubby face seemed to darken with ill intent. "How long have you been livin' in this town? A week? Two? You like it here? Enjoy the scenery ?"

Steven and Dipper looked at each other, genuinely unnerved, though neither knew exactly why. Gideon wasn't exactly threatening, despite how much he was clearly trying to be. But something about this entire encounter was still concerningly… off all the same. "Uh… Gideon?" Steven tried speaking to it first, only to be quickly cut off.

"Oh, and how could I forget about you ," Gideon's bitter smirk sharpened as he looked Steven's way."Steven Universe, prodigy of the Crystal Gems. Even you have to realize that those three ladies cause this town more harm than good."

"No they don't!" Steven quickly rushed to the Gems' defense. "They protect Gravity Falls from things that want to hurt it! They're heroes!"

"Heroes, hm?" Gideon scoffed. "You poor, deluded boy. If you only knew the truth…"

"What are you even talking about?" Dipper asked, very bit as confused as Steven was. 

"Listen carefully, both of you," Gideon's tone and expression both suddenly turned deadly serious. "This town has secrets you couldn't even begin to imagine and so do those Gems."

"Huh?" Steven frowned. Gideon didn't offer an answer as he leapt out of his seat, his small figure somehow seeming strangely intimidating in light of everything he was saying to them. 

"Wait, is this about Mabel?" Dipper asked. "We already told you, she's not into you!"

"LIES!" Gideon snapped, furious "Me and Mabel belong together! She was my peach dumpin'! And she would have been all mine if it hadn't been for you , Universe!" 

"Me?" Steven asked. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, I think you know exactly what I mean, boy," Gideon hissed, fixing him with a jealous glare. "You stole Mabel away from me! I don't know what you did or how you did it, but you've got some gall to try and beguile a taken woman!"

A brief beat of silence passed, only broken as both Steven and Dipper let out a sudden, shared laugh. "Ok, I thought you were crazy before, Gideon," Dipper said, still chuckling. "But now I know you're crazy."

"There's nothing like that going on between me and Mabel," Steven clarified. "We're just friends, honest."

"You must think I'm pretty dumb to believe that hogwash,"Gideon said, his face growing red with rising frustration. "You snatched her affections up and then you turned her against me to make sure they'd get together!" His voice rose to a heated shout as he pointed an accusing finger at Dipper.

"Yeah, because that totally makes perfect sense," Dipper rolled his eyes. Gideon, however, was far beyond listening to any kind of reason at this point. Instead, he approached the pair in a slow, calculated stride, gripping his bolo tie tightly as it began to glow with emerging magic. 

"Whoa," Steven's eyes widened. "What's that?"

Gideon answered, not with words, but by raising his fist high into the air. All at once, Dipper and Steven both felt as though the very ground itself had been pulled out from under them. But, instead of falling, they slowly rose into the air, engulfed in the exact same teal glow as Gideon's strange amulet. He didn't keep them airborne for long though; simply by flinging his hand, he threw both boys hard to the far end of the factory. They crash-landed in a large pile of boxes, largely unharmed, but undeniably shaken in light of what had just happened, over the otherworldly power Gideon had just displayed. 

"Readin' minds isn't all I can do…" Gideon smirked as he approached the pair. Using his amulet, he brought several scattered boxes up into the air, intent on brutally bringing them down on the hapless pair before him. 

"B-but you're a fake," Dipper said, trying his best to hide his growing alarm. 

"Oh really?" Gideon inquired, his eyes alight with sadistic delight. His amulet was still aglow as he stood ready to unleash even more telepathic torment upon Dipper and Steven alike. "Then tell me, Dipper; is this fake?!"

Mabel heaved a heavy sigh as she sat alone on the shack's porch, absently chewing on a lock of her hair. As wrapped up in her lingering guilty thoughts as she was, she didn't even notice Wendy stepping out of the shack until she took a seat alongside her. 

"Hey, how's that hair tasting, buddy?" she asked with a casual grin. 

"Wendy, I need some advice," Mabel began. She'd thought to go back to Garnet for such advice, but she knew she had no real right to. Especially since she hadn't really followed her first round of guidance to begin with. "You've broken up with guys before, right?"

"Oh sure," Wendy said. "Plenty of them. There was Russ Durham, Eli Hall, Stoney Davidson…"

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Mabel continued against Wendy's ongoing list. "I thought everything was back to normal, but I still feel all gross inside…"

"Pysche Wirley, Nate Holt, that one guy with the tattoos…"

"I dunno… Maybe I made a mistake letting Dipper and Steven do it for me," Mabel shook her head, remorseful. "Gideon deserves an honest breakup, just like Garnet said."

"…Danny Feldman, Mark Epston… Oh man, I don't think I ever actually broke up with him. No wonder he keeps calling me!"

"I know what I gotta do," Mabel stood as she made up her mind. Perhaps it was finally time to take Garnet's advice after all. It was time to be honest with herself and with Gideon about how she really felt, no matter what might happen after. "Thanks for talking to me, Wendy."

Still focused on her former boyfriends, Wendy didn't offer much of a response as Mabel set off. She didn't get too far however, as she passed by the temple, crossing paths with the Gems as they headed down the hill. "Heeeey, Mabel," Amethyst waved at her. "You look like you're in a hurry. What's up?"

"Uh… I, um… gotta go take care of something I should have done awhile ago…" Mabel rubbed her arm, averting Garnet's gaze in particular. 

"Well, if you're heading into town, could you keep an eye out for Steven?" Pearl asked, frowning down at the piece of paper in her hands. "He left this note about going to get free ice cream at some factory on the other side of town. To be honest, the whole thing sounds a bit…"

"Strange," Garnet finished for her. 

"Wait," Mabel stopped short, her eyes widening. "Did you say Steven went to… a factory?"

"Yes…?" Pearl arched an eyebrow. 

"A factory…" she repeated to herself. "Just like the one Gideon…" She trailed off, overtaken by rising dread. It took her only seconds to put all of the pieces together. And as soon as she did, she didn't like anything about the picture she was getting. "You guys! I think Steven and Dipper might be in trouble!"

"What?" All three of the Gems asked in surprised unison. 

"Ok, so uh, long story short, I… didn't exactly follow your advice, Garnet," Mabel admitted. "I did tell Gideon the truth, but… I had Steven and Dipper do it for me instead of talking to him myself. They said he took it well, but what if he really didn't and wants revenge instead?!"

"Uh… are you kidding?" Amethyst snorted out a laugh. "You really think Gideon ' s gonna hurt either of them? What's he gonna do? Dance at them 'till they beg for mercy?"

"But he-"

"Amethyst has a point," Pearl cut Mabel off, crossing her arms. "Even if your theory is right, Mabel, I doubt the boys are in any real danger when it comes to someone like Gideon."

"But," Garnet interjected. "If it makes you feel better, then we'll go check anyway. Just in case."

"Aw, really?" Amethyst protested, but as usual, Garnet's word was final. 

"Gems, let's go," she commanded, leaping away. Amethyst and Pearl followed, startling Mabel as they left her behind. 

"Hey!" she wasted no time running after them. "Wait for me!" After all, she couldn't let them be the ones to deal with her problem. Just as much as she couldn't let Dipper or Steven take the fall for her mistake any more than she already had.

In a matter of minutes, the factory had been thrown into complete chaos. With so much of his own merchandise on hand, Gideon had plenty of ammunition to use against Steven and Dipper. He let out a twisted laugh as he effortlessly hurled another handful of crates their way, forcing them both to leap away from each other to avoid it. Gideon didn't give them any chances to catch their breath as he sent several sharp shards of broken glass flying straight at them at frightening speeds. 

"Look out!" Steven shoved Dipper out of the way of this attack just in time. As the boys tried to recover, Gideon came to stand over them, smirking triumphantly as he held several more crates in thrawl, ready to bring them down at a moment's notice. 

"Grunkle Stan was right about you," Dipper glared up at him. "You are a monster!"

"Your sister will be mine !" Gideon proclaimed fiercely. Without warning, he brought the boxes down; though fortunately, Steven and Dipper both had the wits about them to roll out of the way before they could be crushed. 

"Gideon, listen," Steven implored as he helped Dipper regain his footing. "You don't have to do this. I mean, think about it; is hurting us really gonna help you feel better?"

"Well, of course!" Gideon exclaimed as though it was obvious. "Once I take care of you two, no one will ever stand between me and Mabel again! And besides," his grip on his amulet tightened as he sent Steven a downright murderous grin. "With you gone, Universe, that means there will be one less of those pesky Crystal Gems to get in my way!"

He targeted Steven directly this time, using the amulet's power to brutally shove him against the nearby wall. His pained cry wasn't lost on Dipper, who rushed over to help him without a second thought. "You ok?" he asked, helping him back up. 

Steven weakly nodded as he turned his attention back on Gideon. "W-what do you have against the Gems anyway?" 

"Ya'll really wanna know?" Gideon called upon the amulet to bring both of his victims high into the air above him. Unable to escape his telepathic grasp, they could only struggle fruitlessly, utterly terrified of what he might do to them next. "Well, I'll be more than happy to tell ya! They-"

Behind him, the warehouse doors suddenly burst wide open. On the other side of them, the Gems stood, baffled by the alarming scene playing out before them.

"Steven! Dipper!" Pearl gasped when she noticed their precarious position. 

"Uh… what's goin' on here?" Amethyst asked, confused. 

At first, Gideon stiffened, realizing he'd been caught by the very trio best poised to stop him. That is, until he remembered the piece of their power hanging securely around his neck right now. "Well, golly," he let his hold on the boys go, allowing them to fall clumsily to the ground. "Look who it is. Ya know, we were just talkin' 'bout ya'll. See, I was thinking I'd have to go outta my way to finish the rest of you off once I picked off your most useless member here. But since ya'll were nice enough to show up, now I won't have to! Much obliged, ladies, much obliged indeed."

 The Gems could only share a puzzled glance at this. None of them could say they had ever been outright threatened by a literal child, after all. "Dude, what the heck are you even talking about?" Amethyst asked, barely holding back laughter. 

"I'm talkin' about how I'm gonna get rid of you Crystal Menaces once and for all take control of this here town the second I do!" Gideon snapped, frustrated. After all, they clearly weren't taking him seriously; but as far as that was concerned, that was all about to change. 

With a fierce shout, he called upon the amulet to lift all three of the Gems into the air before throwing them clear across the warehouse. Steven and Dipper only narrowly missed being struck by them as they landed in a messy pile right behind them. 

"Garnet! Amethyst! Pearl!" Steven ran over to them with Dipper not far behind. 

"W-what just happened?" Pearl asked, shaking her head to clear it. 

Garnet took pause as she looked back at Gideon. A small gasp escaped her when she finally took notice of what her teammates had missed: the tiny teal amulet he was clinging onto, brimming with a far-too-familiar kind of power. "The Levitation Charm!" 

"The what?" Dipper asked over Pearl and Amethyst's surprised reactions. 

"The Levitation Charm," Pearl repeated. "It's an ancient Gem artifact, one that we lost track of years ago!"

"How'd a little freak like you get your hands on it?" Amethyst asked Gideon, disgruntled. 

"By bein' far smarter than any of you dull ol' rocks could ever hope to be," Gideon smugly proclaimed as he threw another barrage of boxes at the boys and the Gems. Garnet summoned her gauntlets to punch most of them away, with Pearl and Amethyst providing support with their own weapons where they could. Gideon, however, wasn't about to let them get the upper hand so easily. 

As the Gems charged forward to try and reclaim the Levitation Charm, Gideon readily used it against them to send them flying once more. From there, he rained a shower of various merchandise down upon them, from dolls to mugs to decorative plates. As bombarded as they were, the Gems didn't get much of a chance to fight back, especially as Gideon flung them against the wall, keeping them securely pinned against it. 

"Aw, geez!" Amethyst struggled to break free from the charm's hold. Pearl and Garnet did the same, but even they weren't immune to its immense, ancient might. "Are we seriously getting our butts handed to us by Gideon ?"

"This is just plain embarrassing…" Pearl added, cringing.

"Gideon!" Garnet snapped fiercely. "Hand the charm over, now . Its power is too much for you."

"Oh, that's where I'd beg to differ," Gideon chuckled deviously. "If anything, I'd say it's too little power for me. But once I get a hold of even more of your fancy artifacts, that won't be a problem anymore. This Levitation Charm is just the start. There's the Replicator Wand, the Warp Whistle, the Hourglass, Gem shards, and so many more, all just ripe for the takin'! With all of 'em combined, I'll be nigh unstoppable!" 

As Gideon broke out into a round of wicked laughter, the Gems could only look at each other, even more confused than they already were. "Wha–how does he know about all of those artifacts?" Pearl asked, genuinely shaken. 

"Who cares ?" Amethyst growled, still fighting against the charm as best she could. "We gotta figure a way out of this so we can knock that stupid dork's teeth in!"

"We may not have to…" Garnet muttered, nodding back to the ground. 

The Gems watched in a mixture of relief and worry as both Steven and Dipper began to sneak up on Gideon from behind, hoping to catch him off guard and snag the charm away from him. Their plan ultimately fell apart, however, when Gideon noticed their approach at the worst time possible. He spun around with an enraged glare, trusting his empowered hand out towards them far before either of them could even get close. The boys found their bodies seizing up as they rose into the air, left completely at Gideon's mercy, or lack thereof, all over again. 

"Let us go!" Steven cried, wriggling aimlessly. 

"Seriously, man!" Dipper agreed, shooting Gideon a defiant glare. "Just give it up! You're never getting all those artifacts and Mabel is never gonna date you!"

"That's a lie!" Gideon practically screamed. A bloodthirsty grin spread across his face as he noticed several boxes of his officially-licensed lamb sheers lying nearby. As far as he was concerned, there was no better weapon to put an end to two troublesome interlopers, once and for all. "And I'm gonna make sure you never lie to me again…"

The boys and the Gems alike watched with rising horror as the shears began to hover, their sharp blades opening as they drew dangerously close to Steven and Dipper. Though Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl fought harder than ever before to escape and help them, they were ultimately powerless to stop Gideon's cruel attempt at finishing the job. Fortunately, though, someone else arrived just in the nick of time to do that in their stead. 

"Gideon!" The factory doors swung open again, this time for Mabel as she stood with clenched fists and unwavering resolve. "We have to talk!"

The second he saw Mabel, Gideon let the shears clatter to the ground. While Dipper and Steven breathed a sigh of relief, they were still every bit as trapped as the Gems were. Something that Mabel quickly took notice of as she stormed straight over to Gideon. "M-Mabel!" he exclaimed in flustered surprise. "My marshmalla! What are you doin' here?"

"I'm sorry, Gideon," Mabel sighed. "But I can't be your marshmallow. I needed to be honest and tell you that myself in the first place."

"I… I don't understand…" Gideon said, taken aback. He squeezed his amulet tighter, its magic suddenly suffocating Dipper and Steven from their spot in the air.

"Uh, Mabel?" Dipper barely managed to choke out. "This probably isn't the best time to be brutally honest with him!"

"Y-yeah!" Steven agreed just as tightly.

Mabel glanced up at the pair, aptly concerned, before her gaze shifted over to the Gems. Garnet offered her a silent, supportive nod, not needing to reiterate her advice again. Not now that Mabel had finally found the courage she needed to follow through on it when she needed to most.

"Hey, but don't be too upset, Gideon," she placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "We can still be makeover buddies, right? Would you like that?"

"R-really?" Gideon asked, finally letting go of the Levitation Charm

Mabel had been keeping an eye on the amulet this whole time, and as soon as she saw her opportunity, she took it. "No, not really!" she ripped the charm off his neck, holding it high out of his reach. "You were attacking my brother, not to mention Steven and the Gems! What the heck is wrong with you?!" The boys let out cries of surprise as they fell to the ground, released from the amulet's power at last. Likewise, the Gems landed on the ground much more gracefully, and within seconds, they had Gideon surrounded on all sides. 

"You have a lot to answer for," Garnet said, hands on her hips.

"I'll say!" Pearl added hotly. "You've got a lot of nerve to not just steal one of our incredibly dangerous artifacts, but you were plotting on taking even more ? You may be just a human child, but what you tried to do here is absolutely inexcusable, Gideon."

"Yeah! You're lucky we don't pound you and your big dumb hair until you're both flat!" Amethyst threatened, punching her palm. "In fact, I'm still not so sure we shouldn't."

"Gah!" Gideon shot a hateful glare up at all three of the Gems. "We'll see who's beatin' who when I get that amulet back-"

"Nope," Mabel pulled it even further away from him when he reached for it. "Steven, catch!"

Steven easily caught the charm when Mabel tossed it over to him, holding it high to make sure Gideon wouldn't be able to get it again. "Ha!" Dipper sent him a victorious grin. "Not so powerful without that, are you?"

Unable to contain his building rage for another second, Gideon pushed past Mabel and the Gems alike as he charged straight for Steven and Dipper. He barreled straight into the pair, with enough force to not only cause Steven to drop the amulet, but to send all three boys crashing straight through the nearby window. 

"No!" Mabel and the Gems shouted in equal alarm. Their fear was more than warranted, as the Gleeful family factory rested on the edge of a high cliff. As a result, Steven, Dipper, and Gideon were all left in a helpless freefall, only occasionally broken as they struggled against each other. As the Gems raced out of the factory and ran down the hill, it was clear they wouldn't make it in time to catch any of them. But as they soon found, they wouldn't have to. 

Mere inches before any of them could brutally hit the ground, they stopped, suspended in the air by the power of the Levitation Charm. This time, Mabel wielded it to keep both herself and the boys aloft as the light of the full moon shined bright behind her. Her expression was set in a determined glare as she safely set them all down on the ground in the forest below. 

"Listen, Gideon," she said, wanting to make sure he'd get the message this time. "It's over. I will never, ever date you."

By now, the Gems had arrived, mutually relieved to see that everyone was alright. Mabel didn't waste any time handing the charm over to Garnet, who made sure to bubble it and send it away before Gideon could even try to steal it again. 

"My powers!" he cried, distraught. His panic swiftly switched out for bitter anger, however, as he shot the kids and the Gems the fiercest glare he could possibly muster. "Oh, this isn't over," Gideon warned crossly. "I'll make all ya'll pay, every last one of ya! This isn't the last you'll see of wittle. Ol'. Me…" With this threat relayed, he began to back away into the dark forest behind him in an attempt at making a dramatic exit. One that, much like all of his other plans tonight, fell through completely.

"Uh… we can still see you!" Steven called out after him. 

"Well," Pearl huffed. "This whole ordeal was rather…

"Stupid," Amethyst finished, crossing her arms. 

"Well, at least we're all ok now," Steven said with a small, relieved smile. 

"But you guys almost weren't , and it was all my fault," Mabel looked away guiltily. "Garnet, you were right; I should have told Gideon the truth from the start. Maybe then he wouldn't have tried to attack two guys I actually care about…"

"Aw, Mabel…" Dipper said, frowning. Likewise, Steven shook his head; both sure signs that neither of them blamed her for any of this, and yet…

"Like I said," Garnet knelt down to the girl's level as she rested a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Telling the truth about how you feel isn't always easy. And if some people don't take that truth well, that's on them. What's important is that you did what was right for your heart."

"Yeah…" Mabel finally allowed herself a smile. Because for the first time in days, she finally felt unburdened by her own feelings. For the first time in days, she finally felt free . "I guess I did…"

"Ah, this is living," Stan let out a contented sigh as he reclined back in his plush chair. He'd just finished signing the last of the paperwork that would seal the deal he and Bud had worked out, solidifying a partnership they were both sure would last a long time. 

"Indeed it is," Bud agreed, smiling as he sipped his coffee. "From now on, it's all brand name foods and clown paintings."

"That's the way it should be," Stan nodded. After all, he was more than happy to live the high life without having to put any actual work in for it for a change. Or at least he would have if it all didn't fall apart before it could even truly begin. 

This calm was suddenly shattered completely as the front door suddenly burst open and a livid Gideon stormed in. His already burning rage only intensified when he caught sight of exactly who was sitting in his living room.

"Well, look who it is," Bud greeted his son brightly.. "Gideon, we were just-"

"Stanford Pines, I rebuke thee!" Gideon hopped onto the coffee table, pointing an accusing finger at him. 

"Rebuke?" Stan raised an eyebrow. "Is that a word?"

"The entire Pines family has invoked my fury!" Gideon seethed. "And so have those darn Crystal Gems! You all will pay recompense for your transgressions!"

"What, you got a word-a-day calendar or something?" 

"Oh, but sunshine?" Bud cut in with a nervous laugh. "What about our deal with Mabel and-"

"SILENCE!" Gideon screamed, his face red with fury. "The deal's off! I want him out !"

A beat of uncomfortable silence passed, though it wasn't long before Bud broke it with a small, awkward chuckle. "Well, uh, I see that he's taken to one of his rages again. Sorry, Stan, but I have to side with Gideon on this one."

Stan balked as Bud tore up their contract, abruptly ending any merger that could have happened between the Mystery Shack and the Tent of Telepathy. "Okay, okay," he stood, shrugging in apparent defeat. "I can see when I'm not wanted."

Just before he turned to leave, however, Stan suddenly ripped the clown painting clear off the wall behind him, not sparing either of the Gleefuls another word as he rushed out. "Um, Stan? I'm sorry, but I'm gonna need that painting back," Bud called after him. "Stan?! Stan!"

Stan simply laughed as he tossed the painting into his car and sped off. At least he'd managed to get something out of this ruined deal, even if it wasn't much. "Try and catch me, suckers!"

By the time the Gems and the kids finally arrived back at the Mystery Shack, Stan was also pulling up. He heaved a heavyhearted sigh as he got his clown painting out of the back seat, muttering, "I could have had it all…"

He stopped short when he noticed the group lingering near the porch, each of them exhausted and disheveled after everything they'd been through that night. Even the Gems were a bit worse for wear, a fact that Stan had no problems pointing out. "What are you all doin' up so late?And what the heck happened to you? You look like you were attacked by an angry chipmunk– especially you three." He fixed the Gems with a wry, teasing smirk. 

"Pfft, if only it'd been a chipmunk," Amethyst pouted, crossing her arms. "Would have been waaaaay less annoying."

"It was Gideon," Mabel responded simply and tiredly. Both Dipper and Steven echoed her with every bit as much fatigue.

"Gideon," Stan repeated crossly. "Yeah, the little mutant 'swore vengeance' on all of us.. Heh, I guess he's gonna try and nibble my ankles or somethin'."

"Oh yeah," Dipper perked up.. "How's he gonna 'destroy' us now, huh? Try to guess what number we're thinking of?"

"He'll never guess what number I'm thinking of," Mabel proclaimed. "Negative eight! No one would ever guess a negative number!"

Everyone got a good laugh at this, one that came almost entirely at Gideon's expense. In light of all he'd put them through this evening, it was more than warranted. "Yes, well," Pearl spoke up, still chuckling. "I think it's safe to say that without that Levitation Charm, we won't have have to worry about Gideon anymore."

"Hm, as if we ever had any reason to worry about that puny punk to begin with," Stan countered with a confident smirk. As the laughter continued on into the warmth of the night, it was easy for the Gems and the Pines alike to leave behind any and all notions of the largely empty threats Gideon had leveled against them. 

Threats that, against all odds, he had more of a means to carry out than any of them could have thought.

In fact, Gideon was still fuming far into the night. He wasn't about to take such an embarrassing loss lightly, especially not one that came at the hands of the very Gems he was determined to conquer. But now, it wasn't just about them; it was about the Pines family too. As far as Gideon was concerned, every last one of them deserved to suffer. And he was going to do whatever it took to make sure that happened. 

So he channeled his anger into small, crude wooden dolls of each of his foes to join the vast collection he'd already crafted of the rest of the town's residents. He set about using the dolls to mock each of them in turn, starting with Mabel as he acted out what he was convinced she actually thought as opposed to what she'd already said. "'Gideon, I still love you,'" he mimicked in a lovestruck, high-pitched voice. "'If only my stupid family weren't in the way.'"

Gideon picked up the doll he had made of Stan quite some time ago, dropping his voice down as he imitated his business rival. "'Look at me. I'm old and smelly.'"

He let out a bitter sneer as he gathered the figurines of the Gems in his hands, holding onto them tightly as he glared at them mercilessly. "'Oh we're just so 'perfect'!' Everybody loves us, even though we're nothin' but a bunch of goody-two-shoes who horde all their power to themselves!'"

Gideon threw the Gems' dolls across the room, doing the same to Steven's soon after. "'I'm just a two-timin', no account girlfriend stealer!'" He screamed, watching with sadistic satisfaction as Steven's doll shattered to pieces against the wall. 

He was more than ready to give Dipper's figurine the same fate after one final round of hateful mockery. "'Hey, what are you gonna do without your precious amulet?'"

Gideon clenched his fist tightly around the now-empty space where the Levitation Charm used to be. He'd been careless, letting its power be taken from him far too easily. But that wouldn't let it happen again. Not when he had the perfect source on hand to help him get even more . 

"Oh, you'll see, boy…" He closed the old book lying on his desk, a red, leather-bound volume with a golden six-fingered hand on the cover, marked with a number 2. "You'll see…"