I find Lucky watching a TV show.
It's a beginners' robotics course, and it is for children who are six to twelve years old. He is watching the introduction videos for the hundredth time. He knows them by heart.
"Mom," he runs to me and I kiss his forehead.
"What are you watching?" I feign ignorance.
"Please mom." He smiles.
How do you tell your child that you can't afford to enrol him into his favourite educational programmes?
"We will be okay, I will go one day. Don't be sad." He says.
I hug him, and blink to prevent the tears.
"Granny called today. She said that you should call her."
There is only one granny who calls him to check up on him, and she is not my favourite woman.
"I'm going to go to my room, then I will come back to prepare supper."
"Okay," he says.
I call Cora, and she promptly answers.
"Cora, you called Lucky today?"
"Are you afraid that he told me what you have been hiding from me?" She asks in her condescending tone.
"I'm not hiding anything from you."
"My grandson is not involved in any extracurricular activities. On top of that, he stays alone in the house after school?"
"No."
"Are you saying that you are raising a liar?"
"No." I murmur.
"What is going on then?"
"You refuse to willingly let him stay with us. It's either you bring him, or we file for custody." She says with finality.
"But?"
"You are not fit to be a mother to him. He needs a stable home with someone to stay with him after school. He needs a babysitter."
I stay quiet to prevent myself from sobbing.
"What exactly did you do with my son's money that you cashed out from the insurance? It was supposed to be there to take care of his son." She continues.
"I won't let you do that." I say in a whisper.
"You work all the time, and you overspend money. Who knows? Probably on your selfish needs. Why wouldn't I be granted custody?"
"Cora, please! He is all I have."
"I'm sorry. We'll be doing what's best for him," she says in her ear piercing voice.
I hang up and sit on the edge of the bed.
After wiping my tears completely, I go to the kitchen.
"Granny was angry."
She is always angry.
"She just had a long day." I stir the noodles in the pot.
"Why?" He looks up at me.
"I don't know, she said that she had a long day."
"When am I going to visit her?" He asks.
"During the holidays."
"Ok, I will tell her when she calls." He leaves the kitchen and goes back to watch his show.
After eating, I wash the dishes.
I tuck Lucky in and read him a bedtime story about finding enlightenment. He is beaming. I sense a thousand potential questions as I read the story.
"Mom?"
"Look at the time? It's time to sleep baby." I exaggerate my yawn.
"I will not ask difficult questions." He giggles, and I laugh at his observation.
"Goodnight," I say kissing his forehead.
I wonder what he and Callan would talk about if he was still around. He would've loved to tell him about his job, and somehow he would understand. I wonder if he loves programming so much because I told him that his dad was an information technology person.
I take a shower, and switch on my computer to watch a show.
Halfway through, the characters are crying. I am completely absorbed in the show, and I am wiping off tears as well.
My phone rings, and I ignore it. It rings again, and when it rings for the third time, I check the caller ID and then I groan.
"Hello," I try to keep my composure.
"Hi baby." The voice on the other end says.
"Hi mom."
"How are you?" She asks.
"I'm good, how are you?"
"I'm good. How is my grandson?" I chuckle at her delay of the ultimate question with routine questions.
"He is doing great." I sigh.
"So, how is work?"
I paused the show for this?
"How much?" I decide to get to the point.
"How much what?" She says defensively.
"How much do you want?" I take a deep breath.
"Can't I call you to check up on you and my grandson?"
"Really? You called just to check up on us? Nothing else."
She begins to cry.
"You see, your father is too much. He used all our money. We have nothing as we speak."
"How much do you need?" I say impatiently.
"Not that much. Any amount that you can afford to send. Just so that I can buy essential food."
I can't afford anything.
"Mom, I don't have money at the moment, but I will try my best to see what I can do."
"Thank you. I'm glad that you are not like your brot..." I hang up.
She sends a text.
'I love you.'
'You have requested money for the third time this week. What are you guys even doing with your salaries?' I type, and then I delete the text.
I switch off the PC and I break down in tears. I barely have enough money to support myself and my son, but then my mother always calls whenever she can. It isn't enough that I used my entire husband's life cover to pay for my dad's gambling bills and bets. They think that I still have more money.
I was fortunate to have a supportive brother. He used to help me and Lucky financially. Even when I had more money, he insisted on sending money, and he would get mad when I sent it back. That was until he found out that I supported our parents financially. He refuses to give in to our parents' manoeuvres, and I am afraid of letting them down.
How long was I going to keep this up? Getting into debt after debt, in order to sponsor my parents' careless money habits.
Thanks to Hillary's competitive spirit, I am no longer a Thanksgiving host.
I reopen my PC and login to my banking app, then I send the money to my mother.