Marcus Griddle had always considered himself to be a man of simple pleasures. His life in the quiet village of Turnipton was as predictable as it could be: wake up, tend to the crops, eat turnips, and, on particularly exciting days, try to prevent the chickens from plotting their escape. He wasn't a hero, a warrior, or even a guy who enjoyed mild danger.

So, naturally, when the sky started talking to him one morning while he was peacefully weeding his carrot patch, he assumed it was either a prank, or more likely, a hallucination brought on by too much sunshine.

*Ding!*

A golden window popped up in front of him, shimmering in the air like some sort of fancy magic. Marcus squinted at it.

**Congratulations! You have been chosen as the Hero of Light!**

He rubbed his eyes, hoping the words would vanish, but they stubbornly floated there, like an enthusiastic puppy refusing to be ignored.

"Chosen for what?" he mumbled, looking around. No one was there—just him, his hoe, and his extremely confused chickens. "This must be a mistake."

*Ding!*

**Hero System Activated!**

Marcus stood up and dusted his pants, looking warily at the golden text box.

**Main Quest Unlocked: Defeat the Dark Lord and Save the World!**

He stared at it in disbelief. "Defeat the Dark Lord? Save the world? You've got the wrong guy. I've got turnips to water."

The System, however, had other plans.

*Ding!*

**Reminder: As the Hero, you are required to begin your journey immediately. Refusal will result in a 50% reduction in farming productivity.**

Marcus gawked at the message. "What kind of system threatens to ruin someone's farm if they don't go off and fight some Dark Lord? That's blackmail!"

**It's not blackmail! It's just a motivational strategy.** The System's text sparkled cheerfully, completely ignoring his distress. **Now, please equip your Hero gear!**

Marcus frowned. "Hero gear? I don't have any 'Hero gear.' I've got a rusty hoe, some overalls, and a hat that's seen better days. That's all I need!"

*Ding!*

**Starting Equipment Added to Inventory: Hero's Sword, Beginner's Cloak, and Shiny Boots!**

With a flash of light, a large sword, a threadbare cloak, and a pair of ridiculously shiny boots appeared on the ground before him. The sword looked like it could probably cut through a turnip, but that was about it. The boots were so shiny they reflected his startled expression, and the cloak smelled faintly of mothballs.

"I'm not wearing those," Marcus said flatly.

*Ding!*

**Equipping in 3… 2… 1…**

Before he could protest further, the equipment magically attached itself to his body. He now looked like a confused farmer who had accidentally stumbled into a costume party.

Marcus sighed. "I don't have time for this. I have crops to tend."

**New Quest Unlocked: Head to the Nearest Town and Visit the Guild!**

Marcus rolled his eyes. "Listen, system, or whatever you are, I'm not interested in being some hero. Can't you go find someone more… heroic? I'm just a guy who likes growing vegetables."

**Heroes come in all shapes and sizes, Marcus! You're special! You were chosen by the gods!**

He squinted suspiciously at the golden text. "Chosen by the gods? Which ones?"

**...All of them!** the System replied, with a suspicious pause. **Now, off to the Guild! Adventure awaits!**

Marcus sighed again, deeply this time. "Okay, fine. I'll play along. But if this ruins my turnip harvest, I'm coming back here and finding a way to uninstall you."

With a half-hearted swing of his newly acquired sword (which was surprisingly light for something labeled as "Heroic"), Marcus began his reluctant journey toward the nearest town, muttering to himself about how none of this made any sense.

As he walked, he couldn't shake the feeling that this was the start of something truly ridiculous.