Chapter 17: The Moment Of Jealousy
By the time Alex left Noah's apartment, it was already late at night. Though Noah had confidently told Alex he would make Kai remember him, a deep uncertainty gnawed at him. He didn't have the slightest idea of how he would accomplish this. The reality was harsh—how does one bring back memories that are lost to time and trauma? But one thing was crystal clear to Noah: he could never love anyone the way he loved Kai. That love was too deep, too unique, to replace.
Determined yet conflicted, Noah lay in bed, his mind spinning. Sleep felt impossible. He rolled from side to side, his body restless, but no matter how much he shifted, his thoughts stayed fixed on Kai. Every small detail of their time together floated through his mind. The way Kai's lips quirked up in his mischievous smile, the way his eyes gleamed when he was teasing or laughing—those memories were bittersweet. His heart ached.
Noah closed his eyes, desperately trying to rest, but his mind replayed a scene he could never forget—their first kiss. It had been at a cozy café, one of their favorite spots. Kai had looked at him, teasing him as usual, and in a moment of impulse, Noah had leaned over and kissed him. He still remembered the surprised, wide-eyed look on Kai's face, the warmth of that moment lingering in the air between them. It was a moment Noah had cherished ever since. Now, the memory stabbed at him. He moaned into his pillow, muffling the sound as tears began to well up. "I love you, Kai," he whispered into the darkness, his voice cracking as he sobbed quietly into the night.
Morning arrived, but it brought no relief. Noah woke up with a heavy heart, immediately reminded of the events from the day before. His eyes stared blankly at the ceiling as he muttered, "Kai, I miss you." He sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes. Today, he had to face Kai. There was no avoiding it.
He decided that if he was going to see Kai today, he should make an effort. He got dressed with care, paying attention to every detail. For the first time in a while, he even smiled a little as he glanced at his reflection in the mirror, feeling somewhat like his old self. But the happiness was short-lived—his heart was still heavy, and the uncertainty of the day ahead made his stomach churn. He picked up his phone and dialed Alex.
"Can you please find out where Kai is going to be today?" Noah asked, his voice steady but filled with anticipation. There was a brief pause on the other end before Alex responded, his tone more hesitant than usual. "I can ask his parents. I'll let you know when I find out."
Noah thanked him and hung up, pacing the living room as he waited for Alex to call back. He was anxious, tapping his fingers against his thigh. Minutes felt like hours as his mind ran through the possible scenarios of meeting Kai. Would Kai recognize him? Would their connection spark something in Kai's memory? Or would it be another painful reminder that Kai had forgotten him?
Finally, his phone buzzed. It was Alex. "Did you ask Kai's parents?" Noah asked eagerly, but the silence on the other end unnerved him.
"Alex, are you there? What's going on?" Noah's worry intensified.
After a long, uncomfortable pause, Alex finally spoke. "Noah... Kai's going on a date today."
The words hit Noah like a ton of bricks. His breath caught in his throat. "A date?" he repeated weakly, feeling his knees weaken.
"Yeah. His father set it up. She's... She's his father's friend's daughter."
Noah's world spun for a moment. Without a word, he hung up the phone, his mind blank with shock. His legs gave out, and he collapsed onto the couch, staring at the wall in disbelief. All the excitement he had felt earlier drained away, leaving only a hollow ache in his chest. He didn't know how long he sat there, but eventually, he messaged Alex again.
"Where is the date?" Noah asked, his fingers trembling as he typed.
Alex sent him the location, and Noah couldn't believe the coincidence. It was the same café where he and Kai had shared their first kiss. Memories of that day flooded his mind, making the pain even sharper. But Noah didn't care. He had to see Kai.
He left his apartment and made his way to the café, arriving an hour early. He took a seat at the same table where they had once sat, looking around the café as if it still held remnants of their past. He could almost hear Kai's laugh echoing in the space. A sad smile tugged at his lips as he replayed the moment when he had kissed Kai for the first time. He could still remember how his heart had raced, how everything else had faded away in that brief, perfect moment.
Noah resolved to stay and watch Kai's date, even if it broke his heart. He needed to see him.
At 11 a.m., a beautiful young woman, around 20, walked in. She glanced around the café before taking a seat a few tables away from Noah. He didn't pay much attention to her at first, too focused on the swirling emotions inside him. But when Kai walked in a few minutes later, Noah's heart skipped a beat.
The woman waved to Kai, and he smiled at her as he walked over to join her. That smile—a smile that once belonged to Noah, now being shared with someone else—stabbed at his chest like a knife. The pang of jealousy and heartbreak was overwhelming. Noah couldn't hear what they were saying, but watching Kai interact with her, seeing him laugh and smile so easily, was unbearable. His chest tightened with each passing moment.
Unable to take it any longer, Noah quickly excused himself to the bathroom, his hands shaking as he pushed open the door. He leaned over the sink, splashing cold water on his face in a futile attempt to calm his racing heart.
He was drowning in pain. "I can't do this..." he muttered to himself, gripping the edges of the sink as if it would keep him from collapsing.
Just then, the bathroom door opened. Noah didn't bother looking up, assuming it was some random customer. But then he heard a familiar voice, one that sent a shock through his system.
"How are you, Noah?"
Noah's breath hitched. His head snapped up, and his eyes met Kai's in the mirror. He couldn't believe it. His heart thudded painfully in his chest as he stammered, "K-Kai?"
--