When I first saw you all those years ago, I knew instantly that I was in love. I love how handsome and tall you are. I adore your caring and goofy personality. And I admire how hard you work to get better at something you obviously love. I don't even know if you remember me, but I once confessed to you back in junior high. Though I looked way different back then, so I don't blame you if you forgot about it. But you told me back then that you wanted to focus on playing baseball. So, I accepted the fact that I'll always just be an admirer. I resigned myself to that fate. Still, I came to all your games and cheered you on even when the team ended up losing.
But that wasn't enough for me. I wanted to get closer to you in some way. So, I decided to take on volleyball as a sport of my own. I trained really hard and learned everything I can even though I didn't have much interest in it to begin with. I just wanted you to pay attention to me. I even followed you to the same high school and worked my way up to becoming the volleyball club's captain; all the while cheering you on in every game you played in.
I learned how to do make up, changed my hairstyle, and tried to become more fashionable. When I learned about the girls trying to get to you, I scared them all away so they wouldn't distract you. Without even realizing it, I turned into a way different person that I barely recognize myself. Still, it was fine for me. Afterall, if there's no other girl around, you'd have no choice but to choose me, right?
So then, why? Why aren't you looking at me? Even when I'm standing in front of you right now, why won't you even look at me?
"Suzuki-kun? W-what are you doing here?"
"Takamoto-san… I uh… I was waiting for someone. How about you? Why were you chasing after Sugiyama-kun?"
"Sugiyama? Oh, that annoying little— I mean, that underclassman? Well, we had a little bit of a misunderstanding. And I was just trying to clear it up with him."
"A misunderstanding, huh…"
So, Suzuki-kun somehow knows that punk? How did that even happen?
No, that's not important. Right now, I'm finally alone with Suzuki-kun. Because of how popular he is, I've never gotten the chance to be alone with him before. I can finally talk to him without anyone butting in!
"A-anway, you had a really great year, huh? Getting so far into Koshien is a big deal. Do you think you'll get any invites from universities because of that?"
I asked him, but he didn't respond. Was that question too difficult? Or does he just not have an answer for it? It's so silent that I could hear my own heart trying to beat its way out of my chest. I should keep talking or else he might notice it. And he's bound to respond if I just keep asking him questions, right?
"So umm… are you ready for finals next year? I'm preparing myself now but I'm kinda having some trouble studying."
This is my chance. I have to make this work. I have to make him look at me!
"I was wondering how you study, Suzuki-kun. Maybe you can give me some pointers or something. I know! Why don't we have a study session together?"
If I can't even get him to talk to me, then what has the past four years been for? It can't have all just been for nothing!
"We could maybe meet up at the library tomorrow. Or maybe grab a bite to eat somewhere. What do you say?"
Anything is fine, just say something. I deserve at least that much, right? Please, Suzuki-kun! Talk to me! TALK TO ME!
"Or if that doesn't work, I can always just go with you to—"
"Cut it out already, Takamoto-san."
"... Eh? W-what do you mean, Suzuki-kun?"
"Don't bother acting like that. I already know how you really are. And the things you've done to Inoue-san and Kurebayashi-san… You're a horrible person."