"So anyway, when you're sixteen, you tend to do a lot of acting first and thinking later. The Marlene affair was one of those things. She was hot and I wasn't thinking with my brain. Marlene knew it would upset me if I thought I was hurting Dante, so she kept threatening to tell him."
"But he found out?"
"He knew all along. That's another thing about Marlene. She can't keep a secret. At the same time, she's a highly unreliable source of information."
"Fabian, I am so sorry."
He kissed the top of her head.
"It's okay, Lisa. But just out of curiosity, what made you say you didn't think you could be what I want?"
"What? Oh! Fabian, I want to, but I don't think I could ... you know. Franco told me you expect that from girls you date."
"He's wrong about that. I completely understand and I don't expect it from you. You're not ready, and I respect that."
"But aren't you used to ...."
"Lisa. That's the least important part of any relationship. If anyone knows what it's like to be pushed before they're ready, it's me. I had no idea what I was getting into when I was sixteen and if I had I would have told Marlene to take a hike. I will not push you and I don't want you to feel pushed. You'll learn to trust me, and that takes time."
"It isn't personal," she said. "I know someone who got pregnant by accident. She graduated from high school just in time, but barely. I saw what it did to her family and I really don't wish it on mine."
"I understand, and it's all right." He kissed the top of her head again. "It's not what I'm looking for." They watched the fireworks in silence some more, then Lisa pulled her feet out of the water. Bruiser immediately got up and moved to thoroughly lick the water from her feet. Lisa giggled and steeled herself to hold still. Fabian laughed.
"I'm impressed," he said. "I don't think I could stand that."
"It isn't easy," she said through gritted teeth. Fabian laughed harder.
"Why are you letting him do it?" he wanted to know.
"He's probably thirsty."
"Lisa, we're surrounded by water. If he wants a drink, he knows what to do."
"It will probably feel really good when he stops." That did it -- Fabian fell onto his back laughing hysterically. He eventually regained control of himself and sat up.
"Bruiser. Leave Lisa's feet alone." Bruiser looked up, panted his doggy grin, and returned to putting his head in Lisa's lap. Fabian held Lisa like she was a favorite stuffed toy and he never wanted to let go. The ground shook as the finale roared into the sky.
"Is anyone on the beach going to miss you?" he asked once the show was over. He stood, then helped her up.
"Probably not." She found her shoes and slipped them back on. "I told my friends I didn't know whether I was staying because I wasn't as over my headache as I thought."
"Lisa! You told me you were okay!" There was alarm in his voice and she looked at him. He looked so worried she touched his face and smiled.
"I'm fine," she said. "I don't have the headache any more. I just wasn't sure I wanted to be at or near the carnival because it would remind me of you. I wanted an out in case I couldn't bear to stay."
"You're sure?" He ran his fingers through her hair.
"Positive. I promise you I'm fine." He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. This time, there was no interruption. Fabian buried his hands in her hair and she looped her arms around his neck. He was gentle but also very firm. His hands never wandered further than over her back. She'd expected his moustache to feel like she was kissing a toothbrush, but it was soft and well-groomed. The biggest surprise, though, was how the kiss made her feel. For the first time she fully understood how Amy and Greg had lost control and how Ryan happened. She had never been so aroused from a kiss. He pulled back in a flurry of smaller kisses, ending with one on her nose to make her smile. She did.
"Come on," he said softly. "I'll walk you home." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned on him, her arm around his narrow waist. They walked back up the path. Lisa hadn't noticed before, but Fabian had some lanterns lit around his vardo. In the dark and the gunpowder haze from the fireworks, it all looked mysterious. They walked on through the woods toward the carnival, Bruiser trotting along in front. She had never noticed that there were trailers and campers down on this side of the carnival as well as the other residential part where the fortune telling was. There were lights on in some of the windows and she heard televisions and radios, dogs barking, and people talking. She wondered, with a stab of jealously, whether Marlene lived in any of those trailers. As if reading her mind, Fabian said, "Dante and Marlene are over near my parents. That's part of the reason I'm down here. Also, this group is the younger set. My sisters are here, for instance, and some of the younger carnies. You met my sister Adrianna -- the one with the Italian restaurant. I'll have to introduce you to Taryn soon. She's the youngest, and I think you two would get along well. Unfortunately she's not speaking to me at the moment, so it's not a good time."
"Why?" Lisa asked. Fabian smiled, and even in the dim light she could see that his smile was somewhat mysterious.
"Let's just said I'm in the doghouse with her and leave it there for now," he told her. They arrived in the carnival proper. It was dark, quiet, and very eerie. She shivered. Fabian pulled her closer.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
"Fine, sorry. It's just sort of creepy."
"It's no different from anyplace else with the lights off, and nobody would hurt you when you were with Bruiser and me."
"Very good point."
"I thought maybe you'd frozen your feet in the river," Fabian teased, changing to subject to get her mind off of the dark, deserted carnival. Lisa laughed.
"No, the water was nice. It's finally warming up. It usually does around this time. Would it bother you if I asked you to go somewhere?"
"Like on a date? Not at all. Sweetheart, if you have any suggestions, suggest away."
"Amy and her husband live by the river and they're having a swimming party next Saturday. Would you like to come with me?"
"I would love to. What time?"
"It will be in the evening. It's usually from around four until whenever. It's a picnic -- of course I'll be bringing a pie or two."
"That sounds terrific."