I turned to speak to Hechan just after people cleared out from my desk following another incident that occurred - coming to school to find another round of nasty stuff written and carved on my desk.
"Hey, Hechan, have you talked to Soojin by any chance about, you know…"
This may have sounded casual to anybody else, but it was an extremely hard thing for me to say. As someone who used to get relentlessly bullied by him, his name wasn't something that I could speak out easily (not that I ever wanted to). I was simply not used to addressing him by his name while being on the receiving end of relentless violence and humiliation and that intimidating feeling whenever I saw him hasn't completely changed yet even as Jenn. But today, I was hoping that this little wimpiness of me would work to my advantage, and calling him by his name for the first time ever would act as a subtle nudge. The fact that Hechan took a second or two before speaking to me told me that it worked.
