I was fuming with anger as I left the terrace and entered the hall again. Hechan at least had the sense to not follow me this time after dropping that bomb. There were so many thoughts flying in my head. Make me fall for him 'again'? Was there anything between Jenn and Hechan? God, please no. It makes me sick just thinking about it.
At the same time though, there was every chance that Hechan was lying and was messing with me, knowing that I would not be able to tell if he was lying or not since I wouldn't be able to remember. Maybe I was clutching at straws just in the hope that this Jenn had no sick connection with Hechan, but considering what a snake-like manipulative asshole he was, it would not be out of character for him to come up with such a lie to unsettle me to create an opening.
I felt like Hana held the key to finding the answers to this. The way she treated Hechan and Woobin differently when they approached me, the fact that she said nothing about Hechan to me when she must have known that he was in my class when I moved, and the way she literally turned a blind eye when Hechan grabbed my hand as I was trying to get away.
Yes, the anger I felt now was, for one reason or another, more toward Hana than anyone. Ever since I woke up as Jenn, I have put more and more trust in her each day. She took care of many things for me, she gave me advice on anything from picking clothes to 'dating' strategies (more like how to ensure it is not a date…), she protected me, got angry on my behalf, and even kept up to date with my old body back at the hospital.
Yet… why did she just take a step back when it came to Hechan?
"Hana, we need to talk"
"Yes, Miss. I suppose you might have some questions"
"Yeah?! You think so?! What was that all about?! Why didn't you tell me about all this?! Why didn't you do anything about it?!"
I had a sudden loss of temper and challenged her a little too loudly. More than a few pairs of eyes were cast in our direction.
"Miss, please calm down. This is not appropriate here"
: Phew….:
"Ok, let's take it outside"
"Yes, Miss"
We then went out to the terrace where I was with Hechan just a moment ago. He was gone now though so it was just me and Hana there.
"You knew about Hechan right?"
"Yes"
"Why didn't you tell me that we knew each other when I transferred to this school and joined the same class?"
"What purpose would that have served?"
"I would have refused to go to school. I absolutely cannot stand this guy"
"Sounds like I made the right decision not to tell you then"
"Hana!"
"I'm sorry. I could explain more properly, but it depends on how much you really want to know. Judging by how much you hate him now, maybe you don't really want to know"
I was a little scared of what was gonna come out of Hana's mouth but whatever it was, I guess it was better than going crazy myself thinking about what might have or have not happened before.
"Just tell me all you know. Was I in any sort of… relationship with Hechan?"
"Not really"
"Thank god!"
"You guys only spent a week together when you were like 11 or 12. Just as he said, it was a camping trip spent together with your family and his family"
"Ok, I guess you've been eavesdropping this whole time then. So what did Hechan mean when he said he would make me fall for him 'again'?"
"Well, let's call it a 'puppy love"
"Yuk!"
"Although it was a short time, you did like him and it was mutual. But as I said, you guys were only 11 or 12. More like 12 I think"
"That still makes me sick…"
"You guys were too young to be let loose in the wild without supervision. So I accompanied you two wherever you guys went during that camping trip. You had a lot of fun. Running around in the field, catching fish in the stream, gazing at the stars. I was getting diabetes"
"Fack. I don't know if I want to hear any more of this"
"And on the final night there was that ki-"
"WHOA WHOA HOLD IT THERE! STOP!"
Luckily Hana stopped immediately and just shrugged.
"This is seriously messed up"
"May I ask something, Miss?"
"What is it?"
"Why do you hate him so much now?"
"He's the nastiest person I've ever known in my entire life"
"Technically, you've known him only for the past month or two. Isn't that exaggerating a bit?"
Well, I couldn't exactly say I knew him for longer than that…
"He's a bully. A nasty, nasty bully"
"Right, that I did not know. That's both surprising and unfortunate. He was a rather sweet and kind boy back then"
"I seriously can't imagine that, but in any case, I don't care whatever there was between us before. I hate him now, and I don't want to have anything to do with him"
"Maybe he will come good again"
"There is no hope for that guy. He's a devil"
":Sigh: I hope you can work it out though. At least he's nice to you and that's the most important thing right?"
"Why are you so keen to set us up?"
Hana did not answer, but just looked straight into my eyes and blinked a few times.
Wait-, hang on-
"Wha… what was that 'viable candidate' thing about?"
Hana still didn't say a word and just blinked a few more times. How the hell does she do this? It was like she was leading me to find the answer without giving me any directions.
"No, no no no no no. You can't tell me… seriously?!"
"It's the tradition. Girls of the organization are to be paired with boys of the organization. I admit it is a bit unfair as the boys are free to find a partner from outside the organization"
"What the hell?! Where did all this 'family' talk disappear to all of a sudden? Isn't this like inbreeding?"
"That's how things have been for many royal families and among the nobles around the world. To keep the power within the family"
"For fuck's sake! I'm just a high school girl!"
"So it's the right time to start getting to know other guys in the organization so you have plenty of time to judge and pick the right one later"
"So… oh god… don't tell me… you were basically shipping me and Hechan?!"
"I guess that's what the kids call it these days"
Jesus Christ. Everyone's crazy here, and it's driving me crazy too.
The life of Jenn the perfect girl was a lot more complicated than what I could ever imagine before.