"Ajin, may I ask you something?"
After leaving the manga club room, Ajin and I were walking back to the classroom together. The hallways were awkwardly quiet. As my previous self, I enjoyed the silence since it meant there was no one around to bother me, but as now I was walking side by side with Ajin, the silence made me feel somewhat self-conscious.
"Yes?"
"Was there… really a boy in the class who almost killed himself?"
"Don't mind what Chin was saying. It really isn't a pleasant story," she responded and her tone hinted that she didn't want to go into detail.
"I'm just curious—why did he do that? Judging from what Chin was saying, it sounded like he was getting bullied. Is it because of that?", I pushed a little.
I, of course, knew all the answers. I just wanted to see how Ajin would formulate the story.
":Sigh: Yes, there was. I don't know if that really is the reason why he jumped, but yes, he was getting bullied."
I suddenly stopped walking and Ajin stopped as well.
"What's wrong, Jenn?", Ajin asked.
"Ajin, you're the class rep," I said, trying to phrase my words correctly. "I don't want to butt into something that's already in the past, but… was there maybe anything that could have been done to help the boy?"
Ajin seemed a bit taken aback by my directness. Although she probably meant to hide it, there was a faintest hint of discomfort in her expression as my question cornered her. The way I worded it must have come across as though I was confronting her about her lack of action.
"Why do you suddenly pry into this?" Ajin questioned me with a confrontational tone of her own. She was no pushover and I needed to back down a little here.
"I'm sorry," I quickly apologized. "I didn't mean to be too nosy. But I just felt bad that something like that happened in our class." I wanted to diffuse the situation a little and at least get the message across that that I wasn't trying to accuse her of anything.
"Unfortunately, these things happen everywhere," she replied "Or is that not the case in South East High?"
I was stumped for a moment. Obviously, I didn't know what life in South East High was like. But considering 'my' parents and the kind of families that sent their kids there, I highly doubted that they'd let such things happen to their kids.
"Not so much," I shrugged and said, "At least not to the extent that someone gets bullied so badly that he thinks about taking his own life."
"I see," Ajin responded. "Sorry, I just felt like you were blaming me a bit there and got a bit defensive. I guess you're just not used to such things happening in the class."
"I'm sorry too," I quickly added. "But I certainly wasn't blaming you. If anything, it's the bullies that are responsible, isn't it?"
"Yes," Ajin agreed.
"Why didn't anybody else stop them?" I asked after a pause. "I saw yesterday, the guy that sits behind me was being nasty to another boy too."
"I know it'll make me sound like a horrible person," she began, "but there will always be someone that gets picked on. If one person disappears, another person will become 'it'."
Ajin sounded like she was resigned to defeat, but I couldn't deny that part of me understood what she was saying.
"Jenn, have you ever raised a dog?" she asked, suddenly changing the topic.
"Er, no…?"
"You see, when you have a dog in the family with a few kids, the dog observes and identifies the easiest target in the household. It can be the youngest because the youngest will be weak, or it could be the least loved child because dogs can sense these things," she explained.
"Hm…"
"Then the dog will start to pick on that person. The dog will be all sweet and nice, wagging its tail to everyone else in the household. But toward that one person, it'll be constantly barking and growling," Ajin continued as though it was just the way of nature that she was explaining to me.
"Interesting, I never knew that," I admitted. "But what are you trying to say?"
"The point is, nobody— not even animals— wants to be the lowest member in the hierarchy of any group," she said. "A dog, for example, will constantly be challenging the person just one step above him, trying to take his place so he won't be at the bottom. But by the very definition of hierarchy, there has to be at least one person who is at the bottom."
"I think I see where you're going with this," I said slowly, realizing that her analogy had truth in it that was depressing as fuck.
"Yes," Ajin nodded. "Someone in a class has to be at the bottom. When there's a kid who's getting bullied and pushed around, the other kids are relieved that they're not the ones at the bottom. It's really horrible, but frankly, it's just a case of 'better him than me.'"
Yes, I knew this very well. And that's why after I disappeared from the class, the next in line was Donsu. Now everyone will let Hechan bully him and turn a blind eye because as long as Donsu is the one getting bullied and stomped on, it means they're safe.
"Jenn, may I give you a little advice?" Ajin asked, tone of her voice becoming curiously light.
"Sure"
"You saw that boy sitting behind you, Hechan, bully another boy yesterday during lunch, right?"
"Yes, that's what it looked like"
"Hechan is bad news. Don't get involved."
"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks"
As if I needed to be told about that.