What I was about to do would embarrass her, and I didn't think it
should be done in public. I checked left and right to make sure we were
alone, then turned to face her head-on and spoke.
"You can't be doing things like that," I said firmly and quietly.
I wasn't her real brother, and I wasn't in a position to lecture her.
That's why I wouldn't warn her even if people thought she was a
delinquent or spread rumors about her dating for money.
It didn't matter what they said—that would be going too far. I'd be
meddling in her personal affairs, and I wanted to avoid that at all costs. I
doubted Ayase wanted me to get that involved in her life, either.
But this was something I couldn't ignore.
"You could have died," I said. "That was really bad. I can't just let you
go without a warning."
"…Sorry."
Her voice was troubled and hoarse as I quietly admonished her. Her
withdrawn attitude surprised me.
"Oh, uh…sorry," I said. "I didn't mean to sound so bossy."
"N-no, it's my fault."
"Why did you step out into the road? That car was so loud; everyone
noticed it and stayed put even when the light turned green."
"Sorry, I wasn't paying attention… I was too focused on what I was
listening to."
"Your music? You were doing that in class, too. It's fine to enjoy that
kind of thing, but you should be more careful on the road."
I'd wound up lecturing her anyway. Well, whatever. I figured it was
okay, since she'd almost died.
"Ah, um, it isn't music… Oh!"
Ayase reached for her ear like she'd just realized something. She didn't
find what she was looking for, and she began to glance around.
I noticed it, too.
There was an earphone in one of her ears, but the other had fallen out
and was hanging limply from its cable.
It wasn't music that I heard from the device in her pocket. Instead, it
was the calm voice of a woman saying something in English.
"You're studying English?" I asked.
"…! S-so what if I am? It's none of your business."
Ayase covered her pocket with a hand and glared at me. For some
reason, she was blushing.
"I can't believe it… Are you embarrassed?"
"..."
Her shoulders shook briefly; then she was expressionless again.
We left the back alley and returned to the pedestrian crossing. This
time, I carefully checked left and right to ensure no cars were approaching,
then began moving across the street. Though Ayase appeared calm, her
ears were still red.
"So you want to learn English?" I asked again.
"…Why are you following me?"
"We're going in the same direction."
It was simply inevitable that I would be trailing after her; it didn't
mean I had some ulterior motive.
But in reality, I did have a reason for following her.
Maybe the pounding in my heart after that near-death experience was
making me irrational. Either way, I was having trouble reining in my
curiosity about her.
Maybe this was what they called the "suspension bridge effect," where
a scary experience amplified one's attraction. Whatever it was, I had to do
something about this feeling bubbling up inside my chest.
Ayase didn't seem particularly bothered. Instead, she mumbled, "Well,
okay. Whatever," maintained her steady pace, and kept walking "It's just part of my studies," she said.
"Huh? What are you talking about?"
"You're the one who asked about the English lessons I was listening
to."
She looked at me with a scowl. I had assumed she'd ignored me earlier,
but it seemed she was now in the mood to talk.
"For college entrance exams?" I asked.
"That too. But I'm thinking a little further into the future."
"Job hunting, then?"
"We're living in a global age, after all."
Yomiuri would have teased me about being worldly or something if I'd
said that. But when Ayase said it, it sounded perfectly natural.
"In that case, there was no reason for you to be embarrassed," I said.
"Of course I was embarrassed. It was like having you see me, a duck,
desperately paddling my feet underwater when I'm pretending to be a
swan."
"Oh… Are you talking about your armor again?"
"Yeah."
She'd said before that she dyed her hair blond like a bad girl in order to
become a powerful, independent woman.
She had probably been listening to the same audio lessons during PE.
Skipping class was nothing impressive, but PE grades didn't help you get
into college, and Sports Day practice was only good for making fond
memories.
If Ayase had decided that was all a waste of time and used the period to
study, that seemed right in line with her desire to become a strong, perfect
woman.
Ayase was like a puzzle to me, and as I got to know her, I had the
sensation I was moving all the mismatched pieces back into their proper
spots.
We had left the main street by then, the clumps of tall buildings fading
into the background, and we soon caught sight of our high school in the
distance.
The silhouettes of passersby had been varied before—men and women,
young and old—but now they were more or less uniform. Everyone was
around the same age and wore the same school clothes. It was morning
rush hour, and we were all headed to class.