Nothing can compare to our bed. Fluffy, springy bed with pillows, lots of it. A fresh duvet in pastel, with a cool breeze that swipes the morning curtain. The sunshine that pierces the skin, completes the kick start of the day...
Wait, what do you mean by... Sunshine?
"Ai shia!" I jump out of bed, looking at the wide sliding door that connects the room with my balcony. Damn, what time is it? Am I late? Please don't tell me I'm late!!
I hastily grab my phone on the side table, checking the digital clock on the screen. It shows six am. Which is two hours early from my original schedule.
Fuh, I'm saved!
Slowly, I wake up from the bed while tying my hair in a bun. A glass of water drench my throat and supply me with a good amount of liquid for the day.
Now, it's time to make the bed!
I smack those pillows and let them dry under the morning Sun since I love the smell of crisp fabric on the surface. Then, I lay down the duvet after straight the bed sheet, folding it into two before placing it on the down part of the bed. A touch of exclusivity, just like at the hotel. A great kickstart of the day. Superb!
The bedroom is done, so I decide to tackle the heart of the house.
My kitchen.
***
As I descend the stairs, I can see my squeaky clean, meji style kitchen from a small entrance next to the dining area that divided by also a meji style wall. I walk in with a carefree mode, checking the air with a planning in my mind.
Luckily, I wash the dishes last night! Or else, the kitchen will be in total wreck. My friends; Sofia and Mei pay a visit last night. We had a take out as a big supper. Thank God I still able to stand up and clean my kitchen after two cans of beer! This morning, the only thing that I will do is something less effort, which is making a hearty breakfast.
I take out a container lf leftover rice, some veggies, eggs, and sausages from the refrigerator. As I was about to reach the kitchen knife, a creak sound is coming from the outside. To be precise, the sound is coming from the room downstairs, across the guests room.
"Maaa.." I can hear those tiny footsteps coming towards me. From my spot, I can see a big huge, soft bunny doll; one ear flopped down and sweep the wooden floor, and the other one has been dragged by a small, tiny hand who is now standing in the middle of the dining area, rubbing the eyes.
"Bunny! Why are you waking up this early?" my voice serenades across the room.
"You're noisy, ma. I can't sleep anymore!" those cutie lips pout as she flops onto the sofa. I leave the kitchen for a while and walk towards her.
"If you wake up this early, you might end up sleeping at the school later," I let her lay down and pat her a bit so she can go back to sleep.
"We have a nap time. Don't worry..."
"You will get drowsy even before that,"
"Ma... I don't wanna sleep back. Lemme help you..." She starts to whine, which makes me starts having a headache, too! This is bad! If I tell her no, she will keep whining all day long! But, she looks so sleepy and she really need that nap!
"Fine... Fine... Let's make breakfast together!" I give up after looking at her pity eyes. Whilst hearing that, she immediately jumps down from the sofa and runs towards the kitchen.
I can only shake my head in disbelief!
That's my babygirl, Shu. She's four, but she rules the house. We sometimes call her the Boss Baby. Everyone, even my friends will always listen to her. She's the leader of the pack behind those cute bunny face! No one dares to object her. If she wants to do something, you have to give her a go.
Just like this morning when she whines at me so I would let her help me in the kitchen!
She can't do much, but still have a talent in it. So I just let her wash the veggies and stir occasionally. She pays a lot of attention while watching me cook. Sometimes her glare looks like Gordon Ramsay during the evaluation process in the Hell's Kitchen.
She's four but acts like a growing-up person.
"Ma, Aunty Mei said you'll go to school, too. Is it true?" Shu asks. I look at her and nod sweetly.
"So, both of us are going to school together?"
"No. I will go to my school and Shu will go to Shu's school," I bob her nose.
"Ah, I thought we were going to the same school. It feels weird, because everyone is a kid and suddenly you attend as an adult. I mean, my school is for kids only. Now, that makes sense!"
I chuckle a bit.
Shu is a grown-up in the form of a kid. She can digest information and understand the situation so well. There's no problem to tell her about something. She will get the point in her way; good or bad. Her bright mind always steals the limelights among her friends. Having Shu makes me feel grateful. To be honest, it's not really a good start actually.
A background story of us.
I didn't realize that I was pregnant when I left Zee. After I found out that I was pregnant, things got changed. I'm supposed to enroll the college, but I need to forgo my dreams for the sake of Shu.
That's when the life started to get harsh to me.
I was lost and almost this close to abort Shu. As a 19-year-old, there was nothing much to know about babies or pregnancy. I broke down in tears when the doctor announced the news to me. My life was dark and fuzzy.
But, I'm lucky to have friends like Sofia and Mei. They are my strength towards the gloomy days. They make me feel less lonely, although I knew how painful the journey was.
"The baby is not guilty. You're not a victim. This is probably a blessing from God. Believe me. Don't throw it away, please!" Until now, I could hear this plead from Sofia when I told her I was gonna abort the pregnancy.
Because that made me rethink about my whole mess up life.
To be honest, even though things did changed, deep down inside, I couldn't surpass the feeling of being a loser. I was so afraid that I tried to kill myself a few times.
My suicidal thoughts kept going until Shu was 2 months old.
Life was rough at that time. I lost myself so many times that even I lost track of it.
But, one night, after a long day non stop crying, I took a glance of Shu's eyes. She seemed like staring at me, with those round bunny eyes, giving me a look of hopefulness.
After that night, I took some time to think about myself and reflected all of my actions. I thought, perhaps, by now, I should be a good person for the sake of my future. Shu is counting on me.
Besides, I don't want Shu ends up growing up like me; having a broken family with no future. I never feel safe around them.
I don't want that! I don't want Shu to be insecure like me! I have to do something!
That was a thing that played inside my mind for the whole night.
That's when I decided to go back on track.
I started my homemade food delivery with the help of Mei, Sofia and Dan; Sofia's now husband. We begin small because at that time, both of them were still students. Our target customer is their friends from college and some people from my neighborhood.
After four years, we managed to open a small shop just a few blocks away from my house. With a hardwork, I managed to buy a small house, for Shu and me. It's an old house but feels homey. I got it from the district office through an auction.
I'm proud to say that I'm successful on my own. Of course with a million help from Sofia, Dan, and Mei.
Now, I'm one step closer to one of my dreams; further my study. The last time, I failed to enroll because I got pregnant. Years after years I save up for this moment.
Every hard work pays off!
"Shu, ma will get busy after this. So, you need to spend time with Aunt Sofia, Uncle Dan, and Winny. Don't worry, I will make some time for you as well. But, until then, Shu needs to listen to Aunt Sofia and Aunt Mei. Okay?" I rub her cheek a few times. Shu watches me with her big, puppy eyes.
That hopeful gaze melts my worry away.
"I know. Don't worry, Ma! I'll be a good girl for you. But, you have to promise me that you will work hard at school!"
I chuckle a bit. Shu is using my words against me. I always told her to work hard at school. Now, she's passing back my advice to me.
"Okay. I promise. Now, give me a big hug..."
Shu snakes her hands around my neck. I hug her tight, holding my tears. Shu is the best thing that happened to me. I have no regrets having her as my daughter.
"I love you, ma..."
"Ma loves you too, Shu