In the end, Jiraiya finally agreed to train Naruto, though only after the Third Hokage had used a mix of coercion and tempting rewards to convince him.
To seal the deal, the Third even lent Jiraiya his precious crystal ball for two days.
At first, Jiraiya felt he'd been tricked by the old man. But the moment he laid eyes on that crystal ball, all his doubts melted away.
The next morning, Jiraiya and Naruto arranged to meet at the training ground on the eastern side of the village...
"Hehehehehe…"
Jiraiya sat cross-legged on a rock, clutching the crystal ball like a prized possession. He let out a lecherous laugh, a line of drool escaping from his mouth.
"Could you maybe stop that?"
Naruto, standing nearby, couldn't hold back his sarcasm. "Old man, at your age… you can still…?"
"What nonsense are you spouting!" Jiraiya snapped. "At your age, you shouldn't even know these things!"
"Let me tell you something!" he said, standing tall with indignation. "I may be older, but I'm still as vigorous as ever!"
Naruto: …
I hadn't even finished my sentence, why is he getting so defensive?
Maybe it really is a sore spot… Naruto eyed Jiraiya's face skeptically, saying nothing, yet implying everything.
Jiraiya's temper flared at the sight of Naruto's expression, frustration bubbling up. But it wasn't just Naruto's attitude that got to him…
Lately, this kid had been waving around some truly bizarre cards right in front of him at the worst moments. He'd even flashed a card of Chiyo from Sunagakure… wearing a swimsuit!
And if that wasn't bad enough, there was a card of the Fourth Raikage in something equally disturbing.
Just a quick glance was enough to make Jiraiya's skin crawl, leaving him too nauseated to even focus on his precious crystal ball. He glanced down at the scattered cards, thoroughly repelled.
But what really filled him with dread was…
What if Naruto actually tried to use the Transformation Jutsu to mimic one of these cards right in front of him?
"Naruto… can you find somewhere else to hang out for now?"
"Oh, and by the way…" Jiraiya cleared his throat, regaining his composure. "I've agreed to take you on as my disciple. So, could you show me some respect as your teacher? Call me sensei, got it?"
"Now, right this second, get rid of those weird cards!"
Naruto said nothing, simply pulling out another "discipline" card from his system inventory. These cards were drawn by "Naruko" and showcased an array of cross-dressing outfits: Li Kui in white stockings, Zhang Fei in fishnets, even Danzo in a JK uniform…
If it weren't for the Third Hokage still being around, "Naruko" might have even considered drawing Hiruzen himself in a skirt.
In short, these cards were off-the-charts levels of psychological pollution.
Even Naruto found it hard to look directly at them. Whenever he pulled out a batch of these cards in front of Jiraiya, he had to visualize an eighteen-year-old Hinata in his mind just to block out the mental contamination.
"Alright, alright! I'll teach you an advanced jutsu, okay?" Jiraiya gave in, looking thoroughly exasperated.
No way would he believe that old man's claims about Naruto being "obedient" ever again!
This kid… where's the supposed "obedience"? Even Jiraiya hadn't been this much of a handful at Naruto's age.
Hearing Jiraiya finally agree to teach him something, Naruto paused mid-motion with his cards.
An advanced jutsu? Could it be the Rasengan? Or maybe Summoning Jutsu?
Naruto quickly stored the cards back in his system and looked up, trying to appear as obedient as possible.
"White—uh, I mean, Jiraiya-sensei, what awesome jutsu are you going to teach me?"
Jiraiya's eye twitched; he was certain Naruto had nearly called him "white-haired old man" just now. Seeing Naruto's golden hair, Jiraiya couldn't help but think of Minato…
Minato had been so well-behaved as a kid—how did he end up with a son like Naruto?
Or… maybe it was Kushina's influence?
Jiraiya's mind flashed to a certain red-headed spitfire, and he shuddered slightly.
Yeah, that's probably it…
"Ahem!" Clearing his head, Jiraiya tucked the crystal ball safely away, then stood up and straightened his clothes.
"Naruto, watch closely."
Jiraiya bit his thumb, smeared blood on his palm, and began forming hand seals. Then, slamming his hand on the ground, he shouted, "Summoning Jutsu!"
With a puff of smoke, a two-meter-tall orange toad appeared, opening its mouth and rolling out a scroll with its tongue.
Jiraiya picked up the scroll and tossed it in front of Naruto. "Write your name here."
He unrolled the scroll, revealing a list of names—those who had made a contract with Mount Myoboku over the generations.
Naruto took the pen and added his name right next to his father's.
Once he'd completed the ritual, Jiraiya began to teach him the steps of the Summoning Jutsu.
"So, how much of the Summoning Jutsu have you memorized?" Jiraiya asked casually, ready to send Naruto off to practice on his own.
But when he looked over, he found Naruto standing perfectly still, as if frozen in time.
"What are you doing?"
"I asked you a question!" Jiraiya was losing his patience. "How much of the Summoning Jutsu do you remember?"
After a full two minutes, Naruto finally responded. "About half…"
Naruto looked up at Jiraiya with an innocent, clueless expression.
It wasn't that the Summoning Jutsu was too hard…
It was just that Jiraiya had explained a lot of sealing techniques along the way, and that was the part Naruto understood best.
Remembering the Flying Thunder God technique he'd recorded in a sealing scroll earlier, Naruto's mind drifted into the sealing space to study it… only to realize that even with a better understanding of seals, Flying Thunder God was still like trying to solve a complex math problem.
The good news was he'd started to get a faint grasp on it.
As for the Summoning Jutsu Jiraiya had just explained… he'd forgotten about half of it.
"You…"
Jiraiya was fuming, clenching his fist. But instead of getting angry, he simply went over the Summoning Jutsu's key points one more time.
This time, Naruto listened very carefully.
"Alright, alright, now go practice by yourself," Jiraiya said, firmly patting Naruto on the shoulder and pushing him aside. He waved him off like shooing a stray cat.
Since Naruto couldn't memorize even the basics of the Summoning Jutsu in one go, Jiraiya could tell he'd need a lot of time to master it.
Maybe Minato's genius hadn't been passed down…
But then again…
That meant Jiraiya would finally have some peace and quiet.
With this thought, he found a nice corner, pulled out the crystal ball, and chuckled to himself.
"Hehehehe… Ah, young beauties truly are a delight…"
Jiraiya's eyes were practically glued to the crystal ball.
BOOM!
BOOM!
Suddenly, the ground shook with a series of loud crashes. Jiraiya, startled, nearly dropped the precious crystal ball.
An earthquake?
Feeling uneasy, he turned to look…
And nearly passed out on the spot.
"You unruly disciple! Stop that immediately!!"
"That's the Great Toad Sage you're summoning!!"