When Phoenix and I landed on Mount Moria, Killian had already shifted back into his human form. I landed some distance away from him because I didn't want to risk being too close to him. The man was naked, had a very large erect penis and still looked at me like he was ready to devour me.
Killian approached us. His eyes were filled with nothing but wonder and it looked like he was in awe of what he was seeing.
"May I?", he lifted his hand and gestured with it to run his hands through our feathers.
Phoenix remembered that Killian had let me touch him in his beast form and even let me ride him. We both understood that this was a great honour that both him and Taranis bestowed upon us and we had to return that honour to them.
Phoenix reeled in all our flames and we watched Killian get closer and start running his fingers through our feathers.
His hands were firm and slow. He dug his fingers so deep into our feathers that at times he almost touched our bare skin. He touched almost every part of us except the top half of our body which he would only be able to reach if we let him ride us. We couldn't let him do that because Mathew would be the first person to ride us.
He couldn't stop inhaling our scent. His nose was constantly nuzzled into our feathers. He looked so intoxicated by our scent each time he inhaled. Then he continued looking at us with those dark blue eyes of his.
"Phoenix", he whispered into my feathers and rested his head against Phoenix's chest. "You're calling out to me and Taranis, aren't you?"
Phoenix and I took a few steps away from him. His touch felt different. It almost surprised us. It didn't bother us that he was touching us like that. This was a new and strange feeling. We weren't sure of what this meant.
"I want to speak to you, Star fire", he said softly when we stepped away from him. "Please".
I tried my best to take back control from Phoenix, but it felt like even if she wanted to, she wouldn't be able to give me back the reigns. Something was pushing me to the back while making her angrier and pushing her to the forefront of my mind.
"Star fire, please", Killian begged me. "I need to talk to you. I...", his voice almost cracked, "need you."
I was almost drowning in the flames of my and Phoenix's subconsciousness. Everything was on fire and I felt like it was going to consume me. I had to try and calm down. Both Phoenix and I were getting lost in the flames.
I started pulling out as many images as I could of Mathew. I thought about how happy he looked when he brought me to my parents. I thought of all the pictures of me and him that I found in the Alpha suite. I thought about how he would jump up in the middle of the night while I slept next to him just to make sure I was still there.
These images warmed both my and Phoenix's hearts. I felt the flames subside and Phoenix's jumbled thoughts became coherent again. Not being with Mathew and Orion was driving her insane as well. We needed them.
Before long, I shifted back into my human form. I now stood naked infront of Killian.
The harsh and icy wind of Mount Moria was trying to slice through my skin once again, but I warmed up my body so that it wouldn't affect me. The mist on the mountain was so thick that the air was essentially covered in snow and hardly anything could be seen. Phoenix and I adjusted our eyes to the thick mist and I felt the flames in my eyes growing, engulfing both my eyes so that I could see.
Killian narrowed his eyes at me and looked at me with a new curiosity. He had definitely seen how Phoenix struggled to give me back control. Phoenix almost had to travel all the way into her subconscious mind to find me and give me back control. Neither one of was knew what we looked like on the outside while doing this. It must have been quite the sight to behold.
"Your beast, Star fire...", he eyed me suspiciously, "Taranis tells me she yearns to be claimed."
I gulped. "I've already been claimed, Killian", I tried convincing him.
He exhaled slowly and started walking slowly towards me until he stood inches away from me again. He slid a few strands of my hair behind my ear and inhaled my scent so deeply until his dark blue eyes turned black. "You're unmarked and unmated woman and yet you think you've been claimed?", he growled into my ear.
I tried taking a few steps away from him to create distance between us again, but he grabbed my waist with both hands and held me firmly in place, a mere inches away from his erect penis. His hands felt different. I expected both Phoenix and I to be repulsed by another man other than Mathew touching us this way, but we weren't. Phoenix was watching Killian with a new found curiosity. She wasn't sure what she expected from him and Taranis, but she was also not against them touching us.
"What spell has Alden put you under, Star fire?", he growled lowly. "Only an idiot leaves a woman like you unclaimed." I felt his lips lightly grazing my forehead while his hand held my back. I was just trying to make sure no part of my body touched his hardness.
I ripped his hand from my hip and created the necessary distance between us. Something was happening. Phoenix was increasingly getting convinced that Mathew and Orion had already abandoned us and that they were going reject us. She was getting more irrational. Three years was too much and too long for her despite everything she and I knew about the curse.
"Just show me where Maru's blessed river is, Killian", I growled back at him.
I couldn't stand how he was looking at me. He looked at me like he had already claimed me. Like things were already over for Mathew and I.
"I want to touch you", he demanded. "I want to touch you the way a man would touch his woman."
"But I'm not your woman!", I spat at him. "I am not yours, Killian. I-"
"Aren't you though?", he interjected sarcastically. "I told you Alden would not mark you and here you are unmarked. I told you when the time comes, you will run back to me and here you are in my kingdom." His voice was calm and too certain for my liking. He was convinced that I was here for him even though I'm pretty certain he knew I was here for me and Mathew.
Agatha explained the curse to Anha. Agatha's witch friend told us Anha was the one who informed Agatha about the river on Mount Moria. If Anha knows about the curse, there's no way Killian doesn't know about it.
"Don't do this, Killian", I snarled at him. "You know why I'm here. I'm here-"
"You're here to ask me to help another man mate MY woman! ", he roared at me. "You're here to tear my heart into pieces! You're here to fight for a man who is too much of a coward to even face me himself!"
All the anger Phoenix and I felt towards Mathew and Orion was immediately pushed aside when we heard Killian call Mathew a coward. Mathew didn't even know I was here. If he knew, he would wage war against the Gryphon kingdom. He would challenge Killian and kill him for daring to call me his woman.
Phoenix's claws ripped out of my hands flames and all and within seconds, I pounced on Killian and had him on his back while I tore off the flesh on his stomach and chest and burned his skin off.
I had him pinned to the ground with my legs around his stomach. I expected him to shout or fight back, but he did none of that.
His hands grabbed my hips and then I felt him grab my behind as he somehow managed to sit up while I ripped him to shreds.
He crashed his lips into mine without warning. I tried to pull my head back, but he held it in place with one hand while the other held my hips firmly planted on him. He thrust me further into his lap while he thrust his tongue into my mouth. I could feel his erect penis throbbing and pulsating against my stomach as he dug his fingers into my ass cheecks and pushed me even further into his lap.
I didn't want to hurt him, but he was forcing me. I engulfed my entire body in flames and it was only then that the red giant jerked his body away from mine violently. His chest, stomach and thighs were red and dripping blood from my clawing and burning him.
"If I was yours my flames wouldn't hurt you, Killian!", I roared at him. "I am going to kill you for you just did."
He breathed heavily while he looked down to inspect his wounded body which wasn't healing. "You would have done the same thing if you were me!", he growled at me. "Do you have any idea what this is doing to me? Do you understand what you're asking me to do? It is one thing to reject me, Elizabeth, but to come back and ask me to help...", he balled his fists and turned his face away from me. "I never thought you would be this cruel to me."
I let the silence hang between us while the strong winds on Mount Moria filled the tension. He had even stopped calling me Star fire. This was serious. It dawned on me that I had failed to consider Killian's feelings in all this. I only thought of how hard it would be to get him to agree to this. All I was focused on was getting the water from Maru's blessed river so that a potion could be cooked to weaken the curse. The potion would allow Mathew and I to at least be able to mate each other even if we couldn't mark one another.
We were both just breathing heavily while we glared at each other. We had reached an impasse. I wasn't going to leave Mathew and he clearly wasn't going to give me what I needed.
I pursed my lips and mustered the courage to slowly walk to him while I cursed myself under my breath. My steps were filled with hesitation and anger, but I wanted to do this. If I were in his position, I would want to tear the world apart. I needed his help, but that didn't mean I had to ignore his feelings or keep throwing my feelings for Mathew in his face. He needed a friend. He needed someone to be there for him because this was truly a horrible situation for him to be in. The least I could do was stop thinking about what I needed from him and consider the comfort I could give him.
Each step I took seemed to fill him with more anticipation and shock. He looked at me with longing and adoration; like this was what he needed to make everything okay.
I wrapped my hands around him and hugged his chest as hard as I could. Both he and Mathew are tall so given this height, that's where I could easily wrap my hands around him without him needing to bend down to me. Whatever comfort he needed, I would try to give it to him as his friend.
He picked me up and wrapped my legs around his torso. His hands were holding my thighs up and I forced myself to believe that he wouldn't just thrust his hardness into my core in that moment.
My hands were on his neck while he breathed into my own neck. He looked up at me and his lips were so close to mine to mine that he was practically breathing into my mouth. "Don't leave", he whispered against my lips. "Choose me. I can make you happy, Star fire."
I ran my fingers through his thick, red hair and he buried his head into my neck again. He groaned as I tugged on his hair until he was looking at me again.
He once again made sure that his face was so close to mine that I was essentially breathing in his breath while he breathed in mine. I wanted him. Something in me was stirring and what was once a minor attraction was blossoming into something more.
I buried my head in his neck before he could kiss me. This couldn't be happening. Whatever I felt for Killian could never compare to what I felt for Mathew. Mathew is my world. I live for him. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him.
Tears started running down my face while I cried softly into his neck.
"Don't fight it", he pleaded with me. "Please don't fight what you feel for me. Taranis and I feel it too. All you have to do is say yes, Star fire. Say yes and you will bear my mark."
I lifted my head and gestured for him to put me down. He did not fight me. He gently put me down and I started wiping the tears off my face.
"You want me", he said while breathing heavily.
"Yes" I admitted. "But I want Mathew more. Whatever...whatever this is, it's nothing compared to what I feel for him."
He just smiled at me. He started lightly caressing my neck until his thumb landed on my mark spot. Once his thumb was on my mark spot, he rubbed it gently while his dark blue eyes looked deeply into mine. He pressed the sensitive area, eliciting a wince out of me.
He groaned and buried his head into my neck again. This time, I could feel his nose rubbing my mark spot. "Even if he mates you", he groaned into my mark spot, "he'll still not be able to mark you. You know that right?"
"I'll find a way", I said in a whisper.
"You won't", he groaned aggressively and slammed my waist against him. "And I know deep down a part of you knows I'm telling you the truth. That's why you and your beast have started accepting Taranis and I. That's why you're letting me be this close to you. That's why it's harder for you to fight your feelings for me."
I tried pushing him away, but he slammed my waist against him again. He pulled his head out of my neck and started gently nibbling on my lower lip before his lips engulfed mine. He groaned into my mouth while I moaned into his. His tongue gently asked permission to enter my mouth and I let it. He kissed me with such longing that it echoed in my heart.
My fingers were buried in his hair and his fingers were buried in my hair. He refused to break our kiss and for what felt like an eternity, I didn't want it to end either.
When he finally let go, he had the biggest smile on his face. He was breathing so heavily and looked at me like I had given the world to him.
"You said you want a choice, Elizabeth", he breathed against my lips. "I will give you that choice. "
He rested his head against my forehead and still smiled like he just won the lottery. "I will take you to Maru's blessed river. My mother will cook whatever potion you need and I will even let you leave." He lifted his head and took both my hands in his. "But on one condition."
I gulped while my eyes filled with tears again. "What?"
"Tell Alden of your feelings for me. Tell him about this moment we shared. If the love you claim you two share still stands then I will back off. I will accept defeat. But if he refuses to mate you or even if he mates you and then rejects you, promise you'll come back to me. Promise me you'll give us a chance."
"Killian, I-", I tried to protest.
"If you can't promise me you'll come back to me", he quickly interjected, "then at least promise you'll let me know of his rejection. I will come for you wherever you are. I will always come for you."
My heart felt heavy. I had betrayed Mathew and there was no going back. Me, the person who values and demands absolute loyalty at all times had betrayed the love of my life. There was no way to fix it. There was no way Mathew wouldn't reject me after this.
All I could do was nod my head. I would beg Mathew to forgive me. I would beg him for the rest of my life, but Killian didn't need to know that.