I'm apprehensive as I park in front of the Du Pont mansion.
I should be looking forward to celebrating Hannah's birthday tonight, but things just haven't been the same between us in a while, and it's becoming harder for me to ignore it.
With a mere few weeks until our wedding, every issue we've ever had seems amplified.
Perhaps I've just got cold feet, but it feels like more than that.
Part of me wonders if the only reason she and I even started dating was the knowledge that we'd end up together eventually, through our arranged marriage.
Except… would we have? The woman my parents wanted me to marry was Raven.
If I hadn't… if that night hadn't happened, would I be getting married to Raven?
I run a hand through my hair and draw a shaky breath. It doesn't matter now.
There's no going back in time, and cold feet or not, I'll have to marry Hannah if I want to keep my job and my inheritance.
I steel myself as I get out of the car, feeling oddly out of it. I haven't felt like myself lately, and I'm not sure why.
It isn't just about the wedding. It's more than that.
"Ares!"
I look up to find Hannah's father standing by the door, a wide grin on his face.
It's been a while since I last saw him, and I have no doubt he's got a nice bottle of scotch to share with me. When it comes to my future father-in-law, I've hit the jackpot. He's a genuinely nice guy, and he quickly became a second father to me. He makes my own father's absence a little easier to bear. The pain of suddenly losing your parents never really goes away, but it dulls over time.
"Arthur." I shake his hand before he ushers me in, the sound of laughter greeting us as we head toward the patio in the back.
"How's work been, son? I've barely seen you around.
You are staying over tonight?"
I nod. "Work has been busy, but I've freed up the weekend."
Hannah looks up when I walk toward her, my birthday gift in hand.
Thankfully, it's just a few of her closest friends and her family tonight.
Larger events are too stressful for both of us, and lately it's put a lot of additional strain on our relationship.
Tonight is exactly what we needed.
I wrap my arm around her and lean in, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek.
"Hey, Han," I murmur, before pulling away and holding up her birthday present.
"Ares," she says, smirking.
"I can't wait to see what it is!"
Her friends surround her as she opens the box, all of them equally excited.
All of Hannah's friends are actresses too, so I can never tell whether any of their reactions are genuine or not.
"It's beautiful," she says. "Can you help me put it on?"
I nod and take the necklace from her, closing the clasp at the back.
"Looks stunning on you," I murmur, even as my mind flashes back to Raven holding it up against her.
She looks into my eyes and smiles.
"I was wondering why there were paparazzi photos of Raven and you floating around.
The two of you being spotted at a jewelry store sparked some really weird rumors.
Turns out it was because of this."
I nod. Ever since Raven became famous, she stopped going out as much, and I can see why.
The media goes wild when they do catch her outside. These days I only really see her at the Windsor Estate or when she's with Hannah.
Fame hasn't changed her the way it did Hannah — instead, it made her even more of a recluse.
Hannah's friends all surround her as she shows off her necklace, and I sigh as I take a step back.
It's so rare for her to have a night off with her closest ones that I'm more than happy to give her space.
I've got all night with her, after all.
I grab myself a drink and walk toward the swing in the corner, not even remotely surprised when I see Raven sitting on it, her eyes glued to her tablet.
She's no doubt drawing new designs for her fashion brand, and I smile to myself.
I sit down next to her, pushing the swing into motion, and she looks up, her eyes finding mine.
"Ares." There's something about the way she's always said my name.
It feels different.
It's a strange kind of addiction.
"Why are you sitting here all by yourself, Cupcake?"
She laughs then, the sound soft and refreshing amongst the fake laughter that surrounds us.
"Are you really going to call me that for the rest of our lives?"
I nod. "I still vividly remember your cupcake keychain, the t-shirt, the pin on your bag.
You were really into cupcakes."
She glares at me, but there's no malice in her expression. "I was fourteen, and I was going through a phase, okay? I guess I should be glad we didn't meet when I was going through my emo phase. That would've been a disaster."
I smile and glance at the evening gown she's drawing.
It's always astounded me just how talented she is.
"You didn't answer my question," I remind her.
"Why are you sitting here by yourself? Shouldn't you be celebrating with your sister?"
She locks her tablet and turns to look at me.
"I tried." Her voice breaks, and she forces a smile to her face.
Yeah, she probably did try. Raven always does.
It never made much sense to me, but her parents have always favored Hannah, making her the center of everything.
The first time Raven and I met was because she came on a family holiday with Sierra, because her parents had canceled their vacation in favor of accompanying Hannah to an audition.
Hannah does it too.
She takes Raven for granted, and I think she knows it. Raven has organized almost every single detail of our wedding, and even tonight, she's sitting here because she knows Hannah would be upset if she didn't show at all, yet Hannah isn't putting any effort into ensuring Raven is included.
"I'm sorry, Cupcake. I guess we're in the same boat tonight."
She shakes her head. "She gets to see us whenever she wants, but it's harder for her to see her friends, so I get it."
Raven always does this. She always makes excuses for Hannah.
Does she realize that she does that?
"Show me what you're drawing."
She nods and settles against me, her arm brushing against mine, a soft breeze dancing on our skin.
"I'm thinking of trying various shades of nude with heavy beading. Form fitting but classy."
She flicks through her designs, and a hint of pride courses through me.
"You're amazing, you know that?"
She looks up at me, startled.
I love the way her cheeks always flush when I compliment her. She's a supermodel, adored by millions, yet she still blushes like that.
Raven truly is something else, and I'm proud to call her a friend.
"Hey, I've got something for you.
I know it's a bit early and your birthday isn't for another month, but I thought you'd want this now."
I hold up the small paper bag I brought with me, and she takes it with wide eyes.
I watch her intently as she takes out the box inside the bag, my heart beating in a nervous pattern.
When is the last time I was nervous about something as simple as a gift?
Raven gasps, and I breathe a sigh of relief.
"Ares! This tablet isn't even out yet! I've got it on pre-order, and it won't release for another six months.
How did you — "she turns it around and grins when she sees the enamel cupcake integrated on the back of the tablet. "Wow. You… how?! This isn't just… they don't customize these!"
Yeah, this was worth all the shit Lexington gave me when I pleaded with him to ask Aria Callahan for a favor.
If I'd known her personally, I wouldn't have bothered with him at all, but I don't.
All I know is that she's Amara Grant's sister-in-law, and since Amara and Leia are good friends with Lex, I knew he could make this happen for me, no matter how much shit he gave me.
The Callahan's are involved in most tech businesses, and if they aren't, they have the connections that I lack.
"I know someone who knows someone, who knows someone," I said cryptically.
There's no fucking way I'll let Lex take the win for this one. He didn't earn her smile. I did.
"I love it!" she squeals. When was the last time I saw such genuine joy in her eyes? "I can't believe you did this for me. You hate picking out presents!"
I shake my head. "No, I don't. I've always picked out yours, every single year."
She frowns then. "That wasn't Dom?"
"Dom?" I repeat, offended. "Has that fucker been taking credit for all the gifts I picked out for you over the years?"
She laughs and places her hand on my arm, squeezing. "No, I suppose I was just making baseless assumptions.
I love this, Ares. I truly, truly love this.
This is my favorite present ever. I can't wait to draw my next few designs on it."
I smile as she turns it on and starts to mess around with the settings.
"Do you ever relax, though? You're always working, Raven.
I don't know many people who work more than I do, but you're definitely one of them. It isn't healthy."
She merely shrugs. "It's fine. Working keeps my mind occupied. I prefer it that way."
I stare at her for a moment. "What is it you're running from?"
Raven tenses and smiles brightly, yet her eyes are filled with a haunted expression.
"Hey, she seems to love the necklace. I told you, didn't I?"
I chuckle and push the swing away from the floor with my feet.
Her way of changing the subject whenever she's faced with a question, she doesn't want to answer will never cease to amuse me.
"Yes, you picked well. Thank you."
I glance at her with a smile on my face. She's so ridiculously beautiful.
I can definitely see why she's so famous. Hannah is pretty, but more in a girl-next-door kind of way.
She's highly suitable for a variety of roles, and she's an amazing actress, but objectively speaking, Raven truly is something else in terms of beauty.
"You really do need to take a break every once in a while, Raven.
Let me take you to the beach tomorrow morning," I tell her. "Do you still enjoy watching the sunrise?"
She looks down at her lap. "You're staying over tonight?"
I nod. "I figured it'd be easiest if I'm drinking."
Raven looks away, her side profile every bit as beautiful as the rest of her.
It makes no sense that she's been single for so long.
"I think I'll head back to my apartment tonight.
That way, one of Hannah's friends can have my room."
I nod, oddly disappointed.
Just as I'm about to offer to hang out with her some other day, Hannah calls my name.
I look up, and Raven shoos me away.
"Ares!" Hannah repeats, holding out her hand.
I sigh as I get to my feet, glancing back at Raven once, but she's already got her nose buried in her new tablet.
The closer we get to the wedding, the more I feel like Raven is avoiding me.
I can't figure out why she's distancing herself from me lately, but I do know I hate it.