How long had it been since he realized the truth? Perhaps nine months.
The adorable creature—Eídal—felt his limbs heavy, maybe due to the lack of movement or the shackles that kept his bones tethered to the wall. There was only one thought circling in his mind:
'What am I going to do now?'
Being a pet was hardly an appealing proposition.
Suddenly, an imposing figure entered the luxurious room with heavy steps. It was one of the fallen. This being had a bare chest and wore only loose, gray trousers as his entire attire. If it weren't for the massive horns on his head, his silhouette could easily be mistaken for that of a human. However, up close, it was clear that his face had no eyes or nose, and his skin was a dull brown, marked with silver patterns like patches of dry, cracked earth.
In the wide grin of the fallen one, the adorable creature could see an expression of ecstasy, as if he were reveling in the moment. During the siege of his village, Eídal had never seen him take part, but when he was captured, this being was the first to greet him with open arms.
'The master has arrived,' thought the adorable creature.
"Oh, oh, don't worry. You don't have to try to greet me." His words were so soft they might as well have been a caress. They wouldn't even let him die with dignity, forcing him to fulfill the role of a pet.
Placing a plate of food on the floor, the master knelt and began to remove the gag. For the adorable creature, moving his numb tongue to wet his lips was a great relief, similar to stretching after getting out of bed or yawning. And the prospect of filling his stomach was even more welcome. That's why, unconsciously, the adorable creature had begun to look forward to the master's visits, not for the fallen, but for the relief they brought. Indeed, this was a small reprieve where everything felt different.
"Ah! Aah."
"It seems you're a bit down today," the master whispered, poking the adorable creature's forehead with one of his long fingers. "If you eat everything, that pale face of yours will surely improve."
"Um… I—"
The adorable creature tried to speak, but the master silenced him by pinching his cheeks.
"Shhh. I told you not to try too hard."
The adorable creature endured the pain of his atrophied mouth muscles while attempting to form the word.
"A…" he stammered. "A-maste—"
"Yes! That's my name. Now eat slowly."
Closing his eyes, the adorable creature tried not to savor the elegant taste of the food, while his mind repeated, 'What can I do now?'
◇◆◇
The only relief in his new life was the hour when the master visited. It was the only time amidst the monotony when they removed his gag, fed him, cleaned his litter box, and bathed him. This routine tormented the adorable creature for two long years. And, against all odds, this small part of the day gradually became something strange yet special, although the adorable creature resisted accepting it.
However, in the earthly world, nothing was eternal.
'I'm hungry,' thought the adorable creature.
The child who would soon become an adolescent felt his limbs more tired than usual, perhaps because he hadn't eaten anything that day.
' Why isn't he coming? Why isn't the master coming? Mmm… What if it's not just today, but two days, then three, and so on?'
Suddenly, the adorable creature realized what he was thinking. He never imagined this could happen.
' It can't be. Ha! I thought I had gotten rid of all this. But it seems I still want someone to pay attention to me. Ha-ha-ha.'
The need for affection was still present. Even after hating the villagers, the adorable creature still longed to have someone by his side, but did that need for attention include the fallen?
'It's annoying, really annoying, to feel this way. I was supposed to hate them all!'
After banging on his litter box, he tried not to dwell on it too much. These things shouldn't disturb him at all. It wasn't so important whether the master was there or not. Trying to fall asleep, he buried his head between his knees.
'I hate being alone… Did they leave me alone because I'm useless? Damn it.'
When the incident passed and the master returned, the adorable creature secretly couldn't help but feel excited. Although he felt pathetic for it, he simply couldn't deny the shock of his heart. And he prayed that this incident wouldn't repeat itself.
But, as always, his prayers went unanswered.
A few weeks later, the incident happened again, this time with a two-day absence that left him perplexed. The third time, with three days, worried him a bit. The fourth time caused him distress. But the fifth and sixth times filled him with despair.
As no other subordinate was allowed into the luxurious room unless accompanied by the master, the adorable creature couldn't get any hint about the reason for the absence. It was as if the fallen were doing it on purpose, trying to break him.
Anxiety gradually consumed everything: dreams, desires, goals, promises, and even the anger towards the villagers seemed like a distant memory.
The adorable creature, who hated loneliness, couldn't help but be exasperated. And, realizing his own desires, he condemned himself while clutching his disheveled hair:
'Damn it! Damn me! I'm cursed!'
The sudden fasting, lack of water, and extensive loneliness caused him to suffer from continuous cycles of delirium and prolonged dreams. The weakness of his body eventually affected his mind, making it more prone to a state similar to a high fever. These cycles repeated endlessly, without respite, for two more years.
◇◆◇
As if to keep up the tradition, today—almost five years after being confined to this luxurious room—the period of starvation, dehydration, and solitude was happening again. This time, however, the adorable creature had gone nearly four days without food, in complete isolation.
His litter box was filthy. The water supply was gone. Starving, thirsty, and smeared with his own excrement, the adorable creature lost all composure.
'Why?' he thought.
The sudden mood swings made repeating the question an addiction.
'Why? Why hasn't anyone come for me?! I've worked so hard, I've cared so much, I've always obeyed. Why hasn't anyone come for me?!'
Desperate, he groaned:
"Hum! Huuum!"
The sight of the same ceiling day after day didn't help either.
'Seriously, don't they care that I die in such a pathetic way? Yes, yes, they never cared, did they? Damn them!'
'Huh?… Wait! I know it's because I'm useless. I know. It's my fault. My responsibility. So, forgive me, I didn't mean to… I don't want to be bad… I'm sorry, I'm sorry for what I said. I never thought that of you, I swear!'
'So now you'll come for me, right? After all, I've apologized. I said I'm sorry!'
Once again, the silence of the room led him to repeat an undeniable truth: 'I hate being alone…'
The denial that had turned into anger slowly dissipated. Yet, from the depths of his being, the desire for salvation arose. And from the extinguished anger came a feeling of "I wish…"
"I wish someone were here."
"I wish someone would remember me."
"I wish someone would come for me."
His anger was replaced by the longing for a miraculous rescue. You might call it a period of negotiation. The adorable creature understood that his behavior remained weak. However, he wanted to be saved and forget everything; he wanted to stop feeling thirst and hunger. Maybe someone would come to rescue him, be it by coincidence, by soldiers… or a hero.
It was essentially a negotiation with himself, where he promised that, if rescued, he would dedicate himself to serving.
"I swear…"
"To anyone who comes for me, I swear."
"This time I will be useful. I will do things right."
"I swear I will serve anyone who comes for me!"
But amidst all the frantic thoughts, a sharp voice cut through the scene:
"Eídal…"
'Mm?!'
How long had it been since someone had called him by that name? It was so nostalgic. Along with his groan, the adorable creature's heart raced suddenly. As he lifted his face in search of the source, his breath froze.
The unexpected visitor had long white hair that brushed his shoulders. What stood out most on his pale face were his inquisitive golden eyes. And although his attire was simple, similar to that of any human farmer, the elegant aura he exuded would take anyone's breath away.
Kneeling, the middle-aged man approached and said:
"Look at you," he sighed. "As always, your face is quite dirty. Haven't I told you it's not necessary to help the other villagers with their tasks?"
Blinking several times, the adorable creature couldn't help but shout, 'Papa!'
He simply couldn't help it. But if the person in question heard him, it was more than certain he would scold him for calling him that.
Despite being an orphan, the adorable creature had always been cared for by a tutor: Albert Granier. And although he did it without permission, he took his surname from him.
Noticing him close by, crawling, the adorable creature leaned on him. For the first time in a long while, the accumulated feelings dampened the corners of his eyes.
However…
"Hmph, weren't you supposed to be a great man?". Another voice reproached him.
The pulse that had been racing exploded.
'Íngrid!'
It was a girl with a sharp gaze. Her cream-colored hair and peach-toned lips only accentuated the beauty of her amber eyes. The red-gradient dress reached her knees; additionally, she wore long stockings covering her legs and thighs.
'Are-are you really here?', thought the adorable creature.
Not only did he have a shock to his heart, but also a warmth that spread through him, a warmth he hadn't felt in a long time. It was because of that same warmth that the forgotten promise returned with force.
"Did you forget? You said you wouldn't cry."
'Cry?'
The adorable creature blanked out for a moment, but then an expression of regret consumed him.
'That! I was about to. How could I forget?'
Since the adorable creature had his mouth gagged, he could only convey an 'I'm sorry' to Íngrid with his eyes.
"It doesn't matter, you haven't cried yet, right?"
What Íngrid said was true. Despite having forgotten her and his promise, somehow, the adorable creature hadn't shed a single tear.
He comforted himself by thinking, 'Maybe I'm not so pathetic.'
For the first time in a long while, he smiled sincerely behind the gag.
'More importantly, how did you get here?'
Even though he couldn't speak, the adorable creature conveyed his concern by examining both Íngrid and his tutor repeatedly. Ignoring his anxiety, Íngrid spoke urgently:
"This is bad! You look awful!"
The behavior of his old friend warmed the adorable creature's chest, but he tried to contain his feelings for her sake.
"It's not a problem," consoled his tutor Albert. "Eídal is a tough kid, after all."
It was the same strict regimen as always. When they carefully removed the gag, the adorable creature couldn't bear it and stammered:
"Th-thank you…"
"Wait, speak more carefully."
Ignoring the burning in his throat, he forced his voice even more:
"Th-thank you, thank you for coming." It sounded hoarse; however, he tried to make up for it with a smile.
It had been quite some time since he last used his facial muscles, so it hurt.
'But that doesn't matter; in the end, someone came for me. And that's what matters'.
It wasn't the soldiers, it wasn't the heroes, it wasn't the villagers—it was two of the three most important people to him. But amid all that emotion, the adorable creature felt his mind beginning to cloud. In a state of confusion and delirium, he thought he saw his tutor Albert and Íngrid responding in unison:
"You seem quite lively to see me. Ah~! It's a pity you don't have a tail to wag."
The adorable creature froze for a moment, shaking his head repeatedly in a desperate attempt to cling to this illusion.
He didn't want to face reality. He didn't want to accept that the figure before him wasn't Íngrid or Albert, but the master. Though he knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that this was just a delusion, an illusion created by his suffering, deep in his heart, he felt happy. After all, the longed-for salvation had arrived. The initial feelings of contempt, the need for love, loneliness, hunger, thirst, weakness, fever, the strong odor, and monotony mixed together, creating an emotional whirlwind.
Then, a revelation shook him: the love of strangers was not so substantial. What had always mattered most was his family. That is, the only person who had truly been by his side and who, in the end, was the only company he had, even though it was harmful. Now that he had experienced the sweet warmth of happiness and companionship, he didn't want to let it go.
[You promised yourself], said a mysterious voice in his head. [You would serve whoever came for you, no matter what. Those were your own words.]
It was surely another delusion. As the mysterious voice continued to echo in his mind, the adorable creature responded with complete sincerity:
'I promised to be useful.'
The voice whispered again:
[Why do you want to be useful?]
To which the adorable creature confessed:
'For love.'
[Who do you love now?]
'To the one who came for me.'
[No matter who it is?]
'I have nothing left. I never had other options, after all.'
Let it be clear that the adorable creature did not love the master, but the silhouettes of his family that were projected onto him.
[Is it important?]
'In a way, it is, because it was my hated company in my torturous loneliness.'
[And everything else? What about those who didn't come for you?]
'Why should I care about people who, in the first place, never cared for me?'
[Is there something you do care about?]
'To protect those who were with me.'
[From whom?]
'Huh? From whom…?'
[What should you do with those who prevent us from protecting our false love, our torturous company?]
'I don't know. What would be good?'
[You can find the answer yourself. What are you willing to do now? What are you willing to sacrifice?]
'Everything!'
The adorable creature hurriedly answered.
'I promised. Just as I promised not to cry, I also promised to be useful to whoever came for me. And I'm someone who keeps his promises, right, Íngrid?'
At Eídal's question, the silhouette of his friend nodded with a smile. A new promise was born in the adorable creature: to serve whoever saved him, even if that salvation was just an illusion created by his disturbed mind.
A false love for the master, not for who he was, but for what he represented: a human connection, albeit twisted.