The night was still and silent again.
Under the pale silvery glow of the full moon, highlighting the deep dark shadows of a thick jungle, where it seemed like a werewolf would pounce out of the jungle at any moment, 2 men hid, silently lying on the ground under a canopy of thick grass.
Badump! Badump!
It was already more than 20 minutes, yet Paul's heart could not stop beating.
He did his best to put on a brave front when the actual thing happened, but only he truly knew how affected he was by the events of a few dozen minutes ago.
All his life, Paul grew up in Turuk Village under a family of Dionysus.
From a young age, the only things he knew were wine, the village, and the villagers. That was his whole life for 18 years.
Now, all of a sudden, after awakening just 2 days ago, all of it was thrown behind him as his life became turbulent.
Not only did he have to deal with the psychological impact of becoming an awakened warrior, gaining access to God powers, but the events that followed his awakening were even crazier.
Since he awakened, he never got a moment to rest.
From the assassination attempt in his home that ended in his mom dying, to him losing himself to rage, to the lean man's intervention, to going to Aunt Ariel's farm, and to deciding to leave alone, everything was just so much for him.
And now, in the wild world of the Endless Wilderness, he was truly introduced to the ruthless nature of the Age of Gods and demonic beasts.
Entering the Endless Wilderness, he had his first real encounter against a demonic beast in the form of the Blood-Fang Wolf.
That encounter was still fresh in his head, yet he didn't even have the luxury to soak the experience of that encounter in before something even bigger, something even more ridiculous happened to him.
Encountering a ruin of the 21st century was a novel experience to him, but the events that followed it? Not so novel.
The prospect of fighting against 5 assassins that 17 awakened warriors could not theoretically win against already wore at his mental defenses.
He trusted Geass' attack plan blindly but even then, his mental resilience was stressed to the limit when the actual plan was executed.
None of it affected him as when he eventually did it though.
Hidden under the canopy of grass, with his heart still beating heavily in his chest, he looked at his hands and noticed them shaking.
As the adrenaline of battle faded, his face became pale.
He looked dehydrated and drained of blood.
He tried to stop his hands shaking but he could not, he was not in control of it. Paul gritted his teeth. 'They deserved it!' He thought angrily.
'It was the revenge that I've been dreaming of for the past 2 days!'
For the past 2 days, weighed down by the weight of his mom's demise, apart from protecting his sister, there were few things that Paul thought of other than the thought of revenge.
He wanted revenge; he wanted it so badly.
He wanted it so badly that he was determined to do anything to get it.
The image of his mom getting stabbed, and watching the life drain out of her fiery eyes, he would never forget it.
Every time he remembered it, he felt like stabbing something, stabbing someone even and finally, he got his wish so why was he feeling like this?
Why was his body reacting like this?
"You did good". A calm voice interrupted his thoughts.
Paul looked at Geass who laid down beside him. Without looking at him, the lean man continued. "You did well to handle the pressure of the situation, I'm impressed, I never expected you to do so good".
"Besides, you saved my life, so thank you".
"If you didn't advance your authority over storm control at that moment to summon thunder, maybe, I would have died".
He finally inclined his head to look Paul in the eye. "You have nothing to feel embarrassed about, it's perfectly normal to feel the way you're feeling".
"No matter how much hatred you have towards them, what you just did was murder".
Hearing it spoken to his face, Paul flinched, clenching his fists.
Geass did not avert his gaze. "You killed a human being".
Paul took a deep breath.
Geass kept his gaze on him. "Sooner or later, you would have done it. The fact that you're feeling this way after doing it shows your humanity".
"You're not a monster, at least not yet".
"Every time that you kill a human, you will feel this way. The only difference is that you'll learn to adapt to it".
"Sometimes, to survive, we just have to commit murder".
"Remember this Paul," Geass looked deep into the night, his eyes turning darker with the shadows. "If you didn't kill them, they would have killed you".
"Besides, they killed your mom". He paused to let that sink in, and then he added. "Killing them was the right thing".
"Those eyes as the light left them, never forget them. Remember them, they'll make you stronger".
Only after that did Paul allow himself to breakdown.
His mental defenses were already at the limit. Though he hated it, he could not help it, clenching his fists, his whole body shivered as the moment replayed in his head, the moment he pulled the assassin's head from his body.
Watching as life drained out of those eyes, he would never forget it.
Remembering that moment, goosebumps filled his whole body. And when he stuck his Stiletto in the head of the other assassin, this time, he had an even better front-row view as this assassin died.
Yes, he was an assassin, but he was also human.
Paul clenched his fists so tightly that his palm bled. 'They deserved it, they deserved it'. He kept on chanting in his mind.
'They deserved to die!'
'They killed my mom, it's only normal that I kill them too'.
'They wanted to kill me, it's only normal that I killed them'.
For hours, Paul struggled to overcome the weight of murder as it pressed hard on his chest like a terrible burden.
At some point in time though, the goosebumps finally subsided. The shivering also stopped; his heart also stopped beating so fast.
By then, Paul was already thoroughly exhausted. He wanted to sleep.
He closed his eyes to sleep, but just 2 seconds later, they snapped back open.
Geass looked at him. "What?"
"My sister," Paul looked at this lean man, desperation and rage written all over his face. "She's in danger!"