Alex walked into the office building and hurried up to the fifth floor—his single apartment.
It was a good day. Whether it was excitement or the alcohol buzzing through his system, he couldn't sit still. His thoughts kept returning to what the director had said, to the kindness and sincerity she had shown him. A surge of restless energy pulsed through him, and he got up to head to the bathroom.
As he relieved himself, Alex habitually glanced out the window. Something caught his attention. The light in the window opposite was on. This was strange; he'd never seen it before. Their office building was part of a larger conjoined structure, and the bathroom was located at the east end, where it was closely surrounded by three rooms from the adjacent building. The space was tight, but he knew the building across was used as a grocery warehouse.
The lights there had always been off at night—until now. His curiosity piqued, Alex squinted to get a better look. Then, his stomach churned. He saw a man holding a woman, moving from the corner of the wall. As Alex watched, the man began to undress the woman.
"Ah! Isn't that from the Planning Department?" Alex muttered. He have seen these two people before, but he don't know what specific work they do. The woman was a very fashionable person. She quickly unbuttoned the man's pants. She was very anxious and panicked. The man
carried the woman onto a table.
They were only wearing sweaters, with no covering on their lower bodies. Alex was stunned by the crazy action.
This was the first time in his life that he had actually seen a man and a woman make love. Alex's already surging blood
started to, he was breathing rapidly, and his whole body was hot and trembling. The firewood was burning like a raging fire over there, and he could see every move clearly.
It seems that he can hear the sound of friction. He was really glad that the Spring Festival brings him a feast for the eyes.
Seeing the woman turned around and raised her round buttocks, the man entered her fiercely from behind. Alex have never seen such a scene before. Both hands unconsciously grabbed his vigorous cock, fighting and charging with the other party's rhythm.
Suddenly they both stopped moving, the man quickly lay on the woman, and the lights went out at the same time. Alex was also shocked. Did they find him watching them? Then he thought no, maybe they heard
the movement upstairs. There might other who watched them.
Alex was so suffocated when the lights went out. He was still on my way to the final attack. He suppressed his excitement and quietly returned to the room.
Alex's heart was still beating wildly. He fantasized about the director, thing he wanted to do, things he wanted to see, things he wanted to hear from her. He felt released as he thought of director
Then, reality hit him, suddenly he got up and take pen and paper and began to write.
Dear Director,
I am writing with a heavy heart, weighed down by shame I can hardly bear. I have tried to channel my admiration for you into something noble, something pure, but I have failed. I cannot deny it any longer—my thoughts have strayed, and in moments of weakness, I have allowed myself to indulge in desires I should not feel, desires that shame me. I feel utterly disgusted with myself for the things I've done, for letting my mind wander in such a shameful way.
You have treated me like family, like a brother, and yet I've disrespected that bond. I know you are married. You have a daughter. You have a life that I have no right to intrude upon, and yet, despite knowing this, I have let myself be consumed by thoughts that go beyond admiration, beyond respect. It sicAlexs me to admit it, but my heart burns with a longing that refuses to die, no matter how wrong it is.
The guilt is overwhelming. I feel like the worst kind of person, someone unworthy of your kindness, someone who has betrayed your trust. I want to rid myself of these feelings, to bury them where they can never surface again. But no matter how hard I try, the desire clings to me, suffocating me, pulling me deeper into a darkness I never wanted.
I know I should let go, that I should not let this desire live in my heart, but it won't leave. And that terrifies me. Even if I must crawl on the ground in shame, seeking forgiveness, even if I become the subject of ridicule, I can't help the overwhelming need to possess you. It is a need I cannot justify, and for that, I am deeply, deeply sorry.
Finished. Alex put down his pen and breathed a sigh of relief.