The crackle of the fire was the only sound in my study as I closed the heavy door behind me. The dim light flickered against the dark wooden walls, casting long shadows over the shelves of books and scrolls. Gwen was already waiting for me, lounging in one of the plush chairs by the hearth. She looked up as I entered, a small, relieved smile playing on her lips.
For the first time in weeks, we weren't running or hiding. I should have felt victorious, sitting here in my study, newly titled as the Duchess of Valdar. But instead, all I felt was a gnawing sense of unease in my chest, like something was about to slip through my fingers.
"You look tired," Gwen remarked softly as I made my way toward the chair across from hers.
"I feel tired," I muttered, sinking into the cushions. The warmth of the fire kissed my skin, but inside, a cold knot of worry twisted tighter.
Gwen leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, her face bathed in the soft glow of the flames. "At least it's over now, right? You're a duchess, Sera. We made it."
Her voice was hopeful, but there was an edge to it, as if she were trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince me.
I nodded, the weight of the title heavy on my shoulders. "I guess we did."
But it didn't feel like we'd won. Not really. I had come so close to the crown, to the title of Heir Apparent, the position I'd worked for all my life. A hairsbreadth away from having everything—until Eleri had waltzed in, all grace and venom, and ripped it from my grasp.
"I should've been the Heir Apparent," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. The admission tasted bitter. "It was mine, Gwen. And then Eleri… She ruined everything."
Gwen's eyes darkened at the mention of Eleri's name, her lips tightening. "She didn't deserve to be there. Pretending to be your advisor, walking into that meeting like she owned it. How did she even know about the arrest warrant?"
The memory of that day sent a fresh wave of anger coursing through me. Eleri, with her sweet smile and calm voice, had looked me in the eye and betrayed me, right in front of the Queen.
"I have no idea," I muttered, my hands curling into fists in my lap. "But she used it perfectly. Just when the Queen was about to make her decision, Eleri stepped in and made sure I was out. And now, instead of Heir Apparent, I'm stuck with a duchy—a duchy that feels more like a consolation prize."
Gwen shook her head, her frustration palpable. "She planned it all. I know she did. She waited until the last possible moment, until she could do the most damage."
I let out a hollow laugh, leaning back in my chair. "She's good at that—finding the perfect moment to strike. Now she has the Queen's ear. She's wormed her way into Orphic's inner circle, and I'm left trying to figure out what her next move will be."
Gwen's face softened, and she reached across the space between us to rest a hand on my arm. "At least you don't have to hide anymore. No more sneaking around, no more running. You're a duchess, Sera. That's something. We don't have to play the outsider game anymore."
I managed a weak smile. "Yeah, no more hiding."
But that wasn't entirely true. There was still one thing I was keeping hidden, something I hadn't even told Gwen. The letters. Eleri had been sending me letters ever since that day in court—cryptic, taunting letters that I hadn't dared to show anyone. There was something about them, something dangerous, and I didn't know what she wanted yet. Until I did, I couldn't risk sharing them.
"I'm worried," I admitted after a moment of silence. "I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff, and one wrong step could send everything crashing down. Eleri is playing a game, and I don't know what the rules are."
Gwen frowned, leaning back in her chair. "You think she's still plotting something?"
"I know she is," I said, my voice firm. "She wouldn't have done what she did just to hand me a duchy and walk away. She's planning something bigger. I just don't know what."
Gwen sighed, shaking her head. "You're always so cautious, Sera. I thought things would be different once you had a title. I thought we could finally breathe."
"I can't afford to relax, Gwen. Not with the way things are now."
Her face softened again, but there was a shadow of disappointment in her eyes. "I know. I just wish… I wish we could enjoy this, even for a little while."
I wanted to tell her we could, that everything would be fine now, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something was coming, something I couldn't see yet. The tension in the air between us thickened as the fire crackled, and the weight of my secrets pressed down harder.
There was something else I needed to tell her, something that had been eating away at me ever since it happened.
"There's… something else," I began, the words heavy on my tongue.
Gwen's eyes snapped up to meet mine, her brow furrowing. "What is it?"
I hesitated, unsure of how to say it, but I couldn't keep this from her. "It's about Dragonir."
At the mention of his name, Gwen's expression shifted ever so slightly, her face still but her posture stiffening. I knew that look too well.
"What about him?" she asked, her voice carefully controlled.
I swallowed hard. "He came to see me not too long ago. We talked about… everything. The past few months, the changes, the politics. And then he told me—" I paused, the memory still fresh in my mind, making my heart race. "He told me that he loves me."
Gwen didn't say anything for a long moment. She just stared at me, her face perfectly still, but I could see the subtle tension building in her shoulders, the way her jaw tightened just slightly.
"And… what did you say?" she asked, her tone even, though I could hear the strain beneath it.
"I told him I couldn't," I said softly. "Not right now. With everything going on, I can't afford to let personal feelings complicate things. There's too much at stake, politically."
The silence that followed was thick, oppressive. Gwen's gaze shifted from me to the fire, and the crackling flames danced in the reflection of her eyes. I could feel the tension growing between us, the unspoken words hanging in the air like a heavy cloud.
"But I do care about him," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. "More than I let on. It's not just about what I want, though. It's about what's best for the kingdom. For us."
Gwen's fingers tightened around the arm of the chair, and I saw her knuckles whiten as she forced a smile. "You're right. The kingdom always comes first."
But there was something else in her voice, something raw and unspoken. I knew Gwen had always had feelings for Dragonir, even if she'd never said it out loud. It was in the way she looked at him, the way her expression changed when his name was mentioned. I'd always noticed, but I'd never confronted her about it.
Now, it was hanging between us like a thread, threatening to unravel everything.
"I hope you're making the right choice," Gwen said quietly, her voice barely audible.
I met her gaze, feeling the weight of her words sink in. "So do I," I whispered back.
And as we sat there in the flickering light of the fire, the space between us felt wider than ever.