"Eleri, I've been thinking," I began, hesitating for a moment as I watched her face, her eyes still glowing with the high of her acceptance. "About the Sirens. I know it sounds crazy, after everything, but... I think I want to try again. I think I want to go back."
For a moment, there was silence. The room felt heavy, the air thick with unspoken words. Eleri's smile faltered, her expression darkening as the excitement drained from her face. She turned to me slowly, her eyes narrowing as if she were trying to understand what I'd just said.
"You can't be serious," she said, her voice quiet but laced with something sharp. "After everything you've seen me go through? After what they did to me?"
I swallowed hard, feeling a lump in my throat. "I know. But this isn't about you, Eleri. It's something I feel—something I can't ignore anymore. The ocean... it calls to me. The Sirens, they—"
"They rejected me," she cut in, her voice now rising with frustration. "They humiliated me, Sera! How could you even think about going back to them after what they did?"
Her anger was palpable, and I could feel the tension rising between us, like a wall suddenly erected. "It's not about that," I said, trying to keep my voice calm, though my heart raced in my chest. "It's just something I have to try for myself. I've always been drawn to the water. You know that."
She stood abruptly, pacing the small space of our room, her hands balled into fists at her sides. "No, Sera. You can't do this. You can't. They'll crush you, just like they did to me. And you think it's bad now? Wait until you're left broken on the floor with nothing."
"Eleri..." I reached out toward her, but she pulled away, her movements sharp and frantic.
"You don't understand what you're saying!" Her voice cracked with a mix of anger and desperation. "You think you're different? You think they'll just take you in because you feel some... some pull to the ocean? That's not how it works! They'll destroy you. Just like they almost destroyed me."
Her words stung, and I felt my chest tighten, but I couldn't back down. I couldn't deny the pull that had been growing inside me, the pull that had started quietly in the aftermath of Eleri's disqualification but had since grown into something impossible to ignore. "Eleri, I'm not you. My path is different."
For a long moment, she said nothing. Her breath came fast and shallow, her eyes locked on me, wild with emotion. And then, suddenly, she softened, collapsing back onto the bed. "But you don't need them, Sera," she said, her voice breaking, her vulnerability now exposed. "You have me. We have each other. Isn't that enough?"
I sat beside her, unsure of what to say. I hated seeing her like this, so raw and exposed, but I couldn't shake the truth of my own feelings. "You'll always be enough, Eleri," I said softly, placing a hand on her shoulder. "But this... this is something I have to do for myself. It's not about leaving you. It's about finding me."
She stared at the floor, her fingers twisting together in her lap. For a moment, I thought she might understand, might let me have this without pushing back. But then, she looked up at me, her eyes blazing with a mix of pain and something else I couldn't quite place.
"If you leave to become a Siren," she whispered, her voice low and trembling, "then you're leaving me behind. And I won't wait for you."
The words hung in the air like a threat, but there was no malice behind them—only fear. Fear of losing me. Fear of being left alone in a world that had already taken so much from her.
"I don't want to leave you," I said, my voice gentle but firm. "But I can't let that stop me from following my own path. Just like you followed yours with the vampires."
She flinched at the mention of the vampires, her jaw tightening. "It's not the same."
"It is," I insisted. "We're both chasing something we feel drawn to. Something that's part of who we are. You went after the vampires because you felt like it was your only option. And I need to go after the Sirens because I feel like it's mine."
Eleri shook her head, her eyes filling with tears. "You'll regret it, Sera. I swear, you will."
I didn't respond. There was nothing left to say. The decision had been made, and we both knew it. As I sat there beside her, the silence between us grew, stretching out like the vast ocean I now longed to dive into.