School in my opinion was okay, but now it's hard to focus with all the looks and I keep getting harassed about this. How did my classmates get info on the kidnapping? I know Al is missing and he's in all my classes so it's kinda obvious that he's gone, but still.
My thoughts stopped as I was slammed into the wall. I just looked around as people just pushed me out of the way to get to class. I just rolled my eyes and waited for the crowd to disperse. It was so loud I couldn't think with everyone running and talking as the hallway filled and opened and wavered. Lockers slammed next to me and in front of me as I tried to focus on getting to my locker. Though it was hard with my shoulders being banged into every couple seconds and sometimes my head hit a locker. As the crowd kept banging into me over and over again. I just found my way to my locker, opening it. I think I'm being targeted by those who I thought were my friends at one point. Why do they all think it was me? Why am I to blame? Why am I even here right now? Why am I still trying to prove my innocence when nobody believes me? Though should I give up? If I do then I'm just proving their point not my own?
Anyways I keep walking after I put my stuff away. I walk to lunch checking my pockets. Over and over again. Realizing I'd lost my lunch money. The world really likes punching me in the face? Doesn't it? I just kept walking. Let's just spend today in the corner, no need to eat food. I'll just eat when I get home. That's right. As long as it's edible. Let's just hope it is.
Walking into the blaring cafeteria was a shock. Normally everyone's a little quieter or maybe it was just me. I don't know I've been hyper-focusing on every noise and on how bright the lights are since Al. I just want to go home and curl up in a ball, but I got to keep myself together. That's what Al would want. Right? I can't do it anymore. It's my fault he's gone. Why can't I just fix it? Go back. Rewind. Please. I regret every choice up until now. How long do I have to live with this guilt holding my shoulders and bringing me down to the ground? Until I'm 6 feet under begging for air. That's how long, isn't it? Till I'm dead and gone. Till he's found. If he's ever found.