Owen
I sat alone in my study, the dim light from the desk lamp barely cutting through the shadows that filled the room. It was late, but I couldn't sleep. I hadn't been able to sleep well for weeks now. I stared blankly at the stack of papers in front of me, my mind a million miles away. I couldn't focus, couldn't think straight. Everything felt off, like my whole world was tilting, and I was struggling to find my balance.
The silence in the room was almost deafening. It pressed down on me, making it hard to breathe, hard to think. I ran a hand through my hair, feeling the tension that seemed to have permanently settled in my shoulders and neck. Things had been so different lately. Different in a way that made my skin crawl, my heart race with unease.
Liliam. Just thinking her name brought a flood of conflicting emotions—love, frustration, fear. I could still remember the early days of our relationship when everything was easy and uncomplicated. We used to laugh so much, share everything. I used to be her world, and she was mine. But now… now it felt like she was slipping away, and I didn't know how to stop it.
There was always something about Liliam that drew me to her from the moment we met. Something sweet and alluring, like a siren's call. She had this aura, this presence that was so self-satisfying. She didn't need validation from anyone, didn't seek approval. She was confident in who she was, and that confidence was intoxicating. I loved that about her. I loved that she was her own person, strong and independent. But now… that strength, that independence, felt like it was turning against me, like it was pulling her away.
And it wasn't just her personality. I loved her warmth. I loved the way her skin felt against mine, her temperature—so perfect, so right. It was like she could soothe the gnawing sensation that had been eating away at my stomach and soul for so long. Whenever we were close, whenever she touched me, it was like everything was okay. Like I was whole again. That feeling was intoxicating, satisfying some deep, primal need inside me. It made me feel… functional. Normal. But I hadn't felt that warmth in a while, and that was eating at my inner demons.
I picked up a photo frame from the desk, staring at the picture inside. It was of us, taken a few years ago on a trip to the coast. We looked so happy, so in love. I remembered how the wind had whipped through her hair, her eyes sparkling with joy. Back then, I never doubted us, never doubted what we had. But now, looking at her smile, I couldn't help but feel like I was losing her.
I put the photo back down with a heavy sigh, leaning back in my chair. What happened to us? Where did things start to go wrong? I couldn't pinpoint a moment, couldn't figure out when things started to change. But change they had. She was different now. Distracted. Distant. And I knew why.
Zeff.
Just the thought of his name made my blood boil. That damn guy at her office. I don't know what it is about him, but something about the way he's always around her, always looking at her… It doesn't sit right with me. I'm not an idiot. I know how men think. I know the look of someone who's interested, and that's exactly what Zeff is. Interested.
And Liliam… She talks about him so much. Her face lights up when she mentions his name. I see the way she smiles when she gets a text from him, the way she laughs at his stupid jokes. I know I should trust her. I know she wouldn't cheat. But still…
It eats at me, that doubt. That gnawing feeling in my gut that I'm losing her. Losing her to someone else. Someone who's not me.
I got up and started pacing the length of the study, my hands running through my hair again. What can I do? How do I make her see that I'm the one who cares for her? I'm the one who loves her. Zeff… he's just some guy. He doesn't know her like I do. He can't protect her like I can.
But even as I thought that, I knew there was more to the story. A year ago, I had made a terrible mistake. There was a girl—a moment of weakness when I was out of town. I hadn't meant for it to happen, hadn't wanted it to. But it did. I cheated on Liliam. It was a stupid, reckless decision, one I regretted the moment it was over. I confessed to her, thinking honesty was the best course. And she forgave me. She said she understood, that we could move past it. But I knew, deep down, that something changed that day. Our relationship wasn't the same anymore.
Even though she forgave me, I could sense the distance that grew between us, the trust that had been fractured. There was a shadow over us, a lingering doubt that seemed to poison everything. I tried to make it up to her, tried to be the perfect boyfriend after that, but I could see it in her eyes—the hurt, the disappointment. The lingering suspicion.
I couldn't blame her for it. But I couldn't stand it either. Every time she looked at me, I wondered if she was seeing me or the mistake I made. The guy who betrayed her trust. And now, with Zeff in the picture, it felt like that mistake was coming back to haunt me in the worst way possible.
I remembered the night I tried to get close to her, tried to reignite the spark. But she pushed me away, gently but firmly. She hadn't wanted me like she used to. And then there's that wolf pup she brought home. The damn thing growls at me every time I get close to her. It's like I'm not even welcome in my own house anymore.
I hate that feeling. That feeling of being pushed out, being replaced. I'm not used to feeling like this—so out of control, so desperate.
I sank back into my chair, my head in my hands. What am I doing wrong? I've tried to be there for her, tried to be the boyfriend she needs, but it's like nothing I do is enough. She's always thinking of something else. Someone else.
I thought back to the argument we had the other night. The anger in her eyes, the frustration in her voice. She was slipping away, and the more I tried to hold on, the further she seemed to drift. I felt so helpless, so powerless. It's the worst feeling in the world.
I stood up again, pacing more. I need to do something. I can't just sit here and watch as she slips away from me. I can't lose her. Not to him. Not to anyone.
I need to make her see. Make her realize that I'm the one who truly loves her, the one who truly cares. But how? What can I do?
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. I need to think. I need to plan. I can't let my emotions get the better of me. I need to be smart about this. If I'm going to win her back, I need to play my cards right.
A plan started to form in my mind. I won't lose her. I can't lose her. She's mine, and I'll do whatever it takes to make her see that. To make her stay. I'll make things right. I have to. For her. For us.
She's mine. I need her warmth. I need her to fill that void in my soul, to make me whole again. And I won't stop until I have her back.