Since Cherish was studying for the JAMB Examination, she couldn't help around the house, including with her own room.
Every morning, I cleaned her room to ensure Richard would see that I was taking good care of his sister.
My body gradually adapted to the routine of waking up at 4:30 AM, cooking, cleaning, ironing, and preparing for work.
After returning home, I would cook again, iron Richard's chosen outfit, and squeeze in some time to watch a movie and chat with Cherish.
While cleaning, I often noticed blood coming from my nose, but I would quickly wipe it away so no one would see.
One morning, I had a severe headache and fell asleep at my office desk.
After what felt like hours, someone tapped me awake.
It was my boss.
I immediately straightened up and gave him an apologetic look, as I hadn't yet finished compiling the tasks he had given me that morning.
Instead he smiled. "Are you pregnant?".
"Me? Er...no sir".
"You are growing so lean so I think I also doubt. Why are you getting so lean? Do you need a break from work?".
"Break? Er...no sir".
"You do. I will be giving you a one month break to cool off. You are obviously stressing yourself ".
"I am not. I am completely fine".
"Grab your bag and go home".
I panicked as I remembered how my boss did this same thing to two colleagues and told them not to ever return.
As if reading my mind, he said, "I will never sack you, Catarina because you are a good asset to this organization".
"Thank you so much sir". Tears filled my eyes because my body really needed that break.
***
But I don't think the one month break went just as planned.
Richard made me Cherish's full time tutor.
He said I was better in mathematics than her suitors.
After cleaning and cooking everyday, I would teach Cherish till he returns from work.
All the same, there was still no time to rest in the full month.
Richard was a perfectionist.
Most of the time he wasn't satisfied with the way I was cleaning so he would ask me to clean again and again.
Sometimes I would fall asleep in the storehouse because I needed some quiet from this lonely dark world.
On Wednesday, I relaxed in the room, exhausted from the cleaning and recleaning.
He touched me .
I could see it in his eyes that he wanted to have sex with me.
I was too tired to acknowledge him.
Ever since Richard brought out his toxic self, I never enjoyed sex with him.
Sex with him always felt like another task for the day that I had to complete.
So right now, I gave in to this task.
Because if I didn't, he would bite me again.
I had grown in a loving family.
My parents that treated me like a princess.
That was more reason I only had love to give Richard.
The love I was nourished with.
That was why I was so scared of Richard's violence.
I wasn't used to violence and I didn't know how far it could go.