Naruto ran along the rooftops back to his home when a familiar presence landed behind him, "Sasuke-teme, you're out of the hospital I see."
Sasuke glared at Naruto's back, "Fight me dobe."
"Dobe huh?" Naruto didn't turn to face him, "You can fight me in a week like everybody else."
Sasuke looked at him in confusion, "Like everybody else? What are you talking about?"
Naruto shook his head, "Go find Kakashi and ask him. And while you're at it tell him I'm not going on any missions with you all until the week is up… maybe."
Naruto disappeared in a swirl of leaves leaving Sasuke alone on the roof, "He knows shunshin? What have I been missing while I was in the hospital? How strong are you dobe!"
XxX
Naruto once again sat in his apartment meditating silently when his eyes snapped open and he flung a kunai just in time for a poof to go off in his house.
"Maa, Naruto you should really be more careful with these things." Kakashi appeared holding the kunai as the smoke faded, "You do know that we need to talk right?"
Naruto motioned for Kakashi to have a seat as the white-haired man did as directed. Naruto had moved to a more comfortable position on the ground to sit, "So what do you need Kakashi?"
"Kakashi-sensei Naruto." Kakashi finished with an eye-smile.
Naruto snorted, "The last person I called sensei actually taught me stuff. Go ahead and ask your question. Did Sasuke-teme talk to you yet?"
Kakashi sighed, "Yes, and I've also heard from Hokage-sama about your test. Naruto, do you really think this is a good idea? Do you truly believe that you're ready for such a promotion? I mean I can see that you've finally dropped the orange and that scar on you is a new touch, but it takes more than that to be a chunin."
Naruto smirked, "Then it's a good thing that I'll end up being more than a chunin when this is all over then huh?"
Kakashi's eye widened, "You can't be serious."
Naruto gazed at Kakashi seriously, "I'm dead serious. I'm no genin level ninja, I wouldn't even call myself chunin. Doing all of this kiddy crap has dulled my edge. When you're systematically fed garbage that's what you eventually become, garbage."
Kakashi was confused by the whole turn of events here. He expected to simply admonish Naruto for such a brazen act of disrespect, get him to cancel his test and be done with it, but the trend with Naruto these days seemed to be getting more questions and problems than answers and solutions, "Naruto, what are you saying? All genin have to go through missions like the ones you take, we've been over this."
Naruto chuckled, "Go and talk to baa-chan, or even ero-sennin about my 'skill level' and listen to what they say. They've both got the closest inkling to what I can really do more than anyone, and the truth is, I'm not even as good as I should be. At first I thought it was just a work in progress, that if I just trained like I used to that it would come back to me, but I recently realized something…"
Naruto clinched his fists, "I realized just how fucked up I am when I fought Kabuto when we went to go get baa-chan, I was talking to the guy, talking, instead of just running through him and moving on to more important matters. I was casually engaging him like it was a game, like we weren't both there to kill each other instead of me running through him like a buzzsaw, which was what I should have done."
"I should have been kill first, ask questions later. I realized this when I noted that he had gotten back up from the Rasengan." Naruto pointed out the window at Konoha, "It's this place. When I was little that never would have happened, I would have just killed him and moved along. This place's arrogance rubs off on you. The academy stresses stealth, but apparently stealth isn't good enough for a Konoha ninja once they graduate seeing as how I've yet to actually meet one that actively uses it in fights."
Kakashi took offense to that, "Naruto, Konoha's Will of Fire stresses protecting your fellow villagers and comrades above all else. The way you speak of combat, someone would be left out and could get injured, do you not remember my first lesson to you?"
Naruto scoffed, "More like your only lesson, but who's counting? Yes Kakashi, but sometimes a weapon can protect better from the shadows than out in the light. You all specialize in open area fighting. You all are just glorified samurai with special techniques for the most part."
Naruto sighed and stood when he felt Kakashi's glare on him, "Fine, nothing I say is going to make you change the way you think so I'll just use the week off that I told you I was going to take."
Naruto grabbed the weapons and items he sealed in his scrolls, his sword, and headed towards the door. Kakashi noted that he looked like he was going on a mission, "Naruto where are you going?"
Naruto looked back at him, a smile faintly playing on his lips, "I'm going to get something very important to me back. Don't even bother to try and look for me either. If you want to talk to me leave a message here or wait until I get back in on Monday to try to speak to me." Naruto stopped at the door before shutting it, "You can try to find me, but you'll just be wasting your time, because if you can actually find me… then this week was a waste"
Naruto shut his door, leaving one confused scarecrow inside.
XxX
(One Week Later)
Every single solitary soul in Konohagakure no Sato was on edge and watching around every corner for their own safety. It seemed like the 'Prankster of Hell' had returned with a fiery vengeance, only no one could prove it was him this time. The pranks over the course of five days were reminiscent of the days of yore, but only cranked up substantially for a select few others.
Day 1: It was quiet. Nothing really happened to anyone on this day with the exception of one lone pervert at the hot springs, who was stripped, tied up, and had PERVERT spray painted on him before being thrown inside of the woman's baths… Oddly enough he was already crying about his testicles before the women even laid a finger on him in retribution.
Day 2: Day two was noted by a coded message sent out to the Hokage stating intent to pester and disorient the village into oblivion. It stated that she was not a victim, and to handle this like she would anything else, so she simply pulled out a bottle of sake and went about her day.
The first true shots were fired early that morning however when the owners of stores and restaurants in the villages inexplicably found their stock and inventory switched out with each other, everything, even the stuff in storage and lock-up. Restaurants found food switched with clothing, leather, and other goods needed to make clothes, Shinobi outfitters found their weaponry and armor replaced with flowers or canned goods. The entire day for them was spent figuring out who had what from whose store. Needless to say the merchant's guild had more work to do on this day than any other.
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