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CHAPTER 1

"He's late." I rushed through the front door of the apartment, my heart pounding against my ribs like a frantic drum as I gathered my white wedding dress towards the staircase.

I glanced at my phone screen, clicking on his name, My Love, ready to make a call when I halted suddenly, a gasp escaping my lips as a sharp pain pierced my head.

A rush of dizziness swept over me, and for a moment, the world tilted like I was falling into another place, another time. I felt Astrid, my wolf, push forward, a surge of heat radiating through my veins.

My eyes flickered dark gold, and everything became clearer. I had been here before. I... It was my third rebirth. The memories of my previous life came flooding in, and I glanced at my phone. I snickered when the words my love glared at me in my face.

"Time to change that," I muttered.

My heels clicked against the steps as I climbed, faster and faster, fueled by rage. I knew what was behind that door. The past life crashed into me like a wave, the betrayal, the heartbreak, the humiliation—all of it.

Not this time.

I steadied myself, clenching my fists, and moved towards the slightly ajar bedroom door. My breath came in short, controlled bursts as I pressed my hand against the wood.

I could already hear the sharp sounds of pleasure coming from the other side. My stomach tightened, but I shoved the pain down, deep, where it couldn't reach me. I pushed the door open just enough to see inside and there it was—exactly as I remembered it.

Ivan, my supposed fiancé, his body moving against another's, my cousin, of all people.

"Fuck! Pound me faster, Ivy. Arrgh, fuck me hard and cum in me," my cousin moaned loudly.

The sheets twisted around their limbs, their voices filled with an intimacy that was supposed to be ours. My grip tightened around my phone, and I lifted it, the click of the camera capturing the sordid scene.

One, two, three pictures—just in case.

I glanced back at them. This time, the sheets had been tossed aside, their naked flesh in full display as he thrust in wildly.

The fury surged up from deep within me, no longer just my anger, but Astrid's too. I shoved the door open hard, and it crashed against the wall. Ivan jerked back, his eyes wide with shock.

"Zara—what the hell are you doing here?"

The effrontery!

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" I spat back coldly, my hands trembling with barely contained rage.

He stuttered, his face turning pale, scrambling to cover himself, but I was already moving, closing the distance between us in two quick strides.

I didn't give him a chance to speak. My hand swung up with a crack that echoed in the room as I slapped him across the face.

Shock flared in his eyes as he stumbled back, his hand flying to his cheek. He inhaled deeply. "Zara, please, let me explain—"

"Explain?!" I cut him off, laughing, even though my voice was bitter. "Explain what, Ivan? That you're a lying, cheating bastard? That you've been fucking my cousin behind my back?"

His face paled, but he stepped toward me, hands raised like he was calming a wild animal. "Zara, baby, you're upset. Let's just talk about this, okay?"

"We're not having this conversation," I grit, my fingers balling at my side.

"Today's our wedding day," Ivan voiced softly.

"Is it or is it that of you and your side chick?" I shook my head, forcing back the tears that blurred my vision briefly. "You think I'm stupid, Ivan? You think I didn't know? That I wouldn't find out?"

"Zar, it isn't what you think. Ivan loves me and…" I glared at Clarissa and she immediately stuttered.

Her face was flushed with embarrassment and something more as she clutched the sheet to her chest.

"Look," she tried to speak again, but I whirled around on her, passing Ivan. "Don't even start, Clarissa," I snapped. "You think I don't know how long this has been going on?"

To my surprise, her facade fell quickly as she rose, the bedsheet draping around her. "Since you do, then you should know that he loves me. You are just the third wheel in our relationship."

I reacted fast, slapping her across the cheek and she fell to the ground, obviously as an added effect to pump Ivan's buttons. Still, I spat, "You're pathetic. Look at you claiming a relationship when you are nothing more than a cheating whore!" 

Her mouth opened and closed, and she looked away, tears filling her eyes, but I didn't care.

Not this time.

I had been a fool for too long. I was lucky I had been given another chance. I wouldn't waste it—not on these scums.

"Zara!"

I glared at Ivan. Something akin to anger flared in his eyes as he rushed between us, not caring if he pushed me out of the way to block her from me. Within seconds he was squatting beside her, checking her face tenderly, something that was meant for me. 

I sneered and he stood back up, slapping me. "You will not speak to Clarissa like that. She's the one I love!"

I blinked, lifting my brow in disgust. Did he just yell and slap me? 

Why was I surprised when he was like this in my past lives? Clarissa this, Clarissa that. You can't be like Clarrissa. She is the opposite of you. I prefer Clarrissa… Always freaking fucking Clarrissa!

I had enough.

My eyes burned but her held back. "And I? I am supposed to be what?"

A smug smile formed on his lips and that same condescending wicked look I had seen just moments before my death, stared me in the face. 

"You're a piece of the puzzle. Someone I need but we can still make this work. Zara baby," his tone changed instantly, "you love me. I won't put you aside and I can still keep having her while you and I go for our wedding…"

I didn't even think. The mere mention of our wedding day brought back flashes of our past lives—bad pasts and his selfish thinking made my anger flare.

With all the strength I could muster, my knee jerked up, hard and fast, slamming into his groin. He doubled over with a groan, his face twisting in pain.

"You're sick! There is no we. You made sure of that when you were balls deep in her," I said in a cold, deadly tone and hissed, bending down to his level. "You're dead to me, Ivan. Both of you."

Ivan wheezed, clutching his groin, trying to catch his breath. When he noticed I was going to play his puppet anymore, he tried a different approach. "Zara… please… t-the wedding…"

I couldn't help but laugh. It was harsh and humourless. "Oh, there's going to be a wedding, Ivan. Just not with you." I yanked the engagement ring from my middle finger and tossed it onto the floor, the tiny diamond catching the light for just a second before it skittered under the bed.

I spun and marched out, leaving him and Clarissa gaping.

As I reached the door, Ivan's voice followed me, desperate and pleading. "Zara, don't you dare do this. You can't marry anyone else!"

I stopped my hand on the doorframe and turned back to him, a cold smile spreading across my face. "Watch me, I'm done playing by your rules."

I stormed down the stairs, every step filled with purpose. I knew where I needed to go. I knew exactly what I needed to do. 

My phone was in my hand, and I was already dialling. "Ella," I said when my best friend picked up, "I need a call boy. I don't care who, just find someone and send them to the marriage registry, now."

Ella started to ask questions, but I hung up, not wasting another second. I burst through the front door, heading straight for my car. 

Ivan wanted to play games? Fine. But this time, I was making the rules.

In my first life, I caught them cheating three years into our marriage and that day became my last when my cousin killed me.

In my second life, I stupidly followed Clarissa's suggestion claiming I was too attention-seeking which was why he left me. I did the opposite. 

You can already guess what… I lost him. 

I had almost caught him cheating then but I was too blind by my love for him even when I saw proof and did not confront him. But in our fourth year in marriage, I discovered she was pregnant for him while I, he forced to take contraceptives claiming he wasn't ready for kids.

In anger I confronted them but my wolf and I were weak. Ivan puhed me when I angrily hit Clarissa after discovering they'd fed me trace amounts of wolfsbane for months.

I lost my balance, hit my head against the edge of the bed frame and died due to excessive blood loss while my husband and cousin watched me.

I arrived at the registry, my heart still racing, but I was more focused than ever. My eyes scanned the viscinity until they settled on a tall, handsome man standing near the entrance, his posture relaxed but commanding. His dark hair fell across his forehead, and his sharp, piercing eyes seemed to take in everything around him.

Ella surely knew what I loved. He played his role well.

I didn't waste a moment. I strode over to him with confidence I barely felt, my voice steady as I asked, "Are you ready to get married?"

His brows lifted slightly as he took me in, a hint of a smile playing at the corner of his lips. "To you? Always."

And just like that, I knew I'd made the right choice.