Lessin's free time was Bible time. She was as obsessed with it as much as a hen treasures its eggs. She used to say that the Bible had all the answers to our most brain-pinching questions. She was correct. But despite her good understanding of the word of the Lord, she still couldn't put a finger on the one matter that kneaded her guts.
Sabrina had spotted her from afar, sitting by herself under one of the pine trees in the field. She would have continued to be on her way, but she chose to go to her, even after being embarrassed a few days ago. She was strong-willed, a trait that never once gave her some promising results. Currently, she was so obsessed with the girl in glasses, holding her Bible like it's fragile.
The sound of approaching footsteps alerted Lessin that she had unwanted company. Immediately, her face creased with annoyment. Who was it that dared to distract her from the Holy?
"Hi Lessin.", said Sabrina, fingers crossed, hoping for whatever will happen to be less awkward than the previous interaction.
Lessin looked up at her. Oh, her again. Her eyes lowered to Sabrina's hands, just in case she brought soda again. But that day, they were empty. She just had her shoulder bag on.
"Can I sit with you?", Sabrina asked again, more softly.
"I'm kind of in the middle of something _",
"Reading a Bible, great. I do have some questions to ask you about the Bible. I should sit.",
She invited herself to the ground. Lessin loosened up a little bit. She loved to talk about the Lord's gospel, even with a stranger.
"I'm curious about something.", Sabrina commenced, "What does the Bible say about love?",
"1 John 4:7-8; loving ourselves, our neighbors and him. Love is a foundation in which everything is built on.", Lessin explained with enthusiasm, "There's no peace without love. There's no hard work without love. Joy is love. You know, even hate is born from love. You can only hate somebody after loving them first.",
Sabrina nodded with a beam. She realized that that was the first time she had something like a conversation with Lessin. Listening to her talk about something she truly loved was such a warm feeling.
"When it comes to love, are there rules?", she asked, keeping the talk going.
"No. Love has no rules. No judgment. No conditions.",
"So _", she bit her lower lip nervously. She was about to broadcast a huge hint, "When I _ suddenly, unexpectedly, find myself falling in love with _ err _ a girl, is that okay?",
Silence. Awkward silence. Exactly what Sabrina avoided. But those two made awkwardness inevitable. It felt like they were in a bubble since sound was muffled. Even the wind was louder than their breathing.
Lessin's inwards were in chaos. That question. That one question that made her ponder. Why did it come back to her again like a boomerang?
"Love has no rules, you said. You love who you love.", Sabrina proceeded, "So a girl can love a girl, and a boy can love a boy, right?",
Lessin was in a stammer, "The Bible says to love your neighbor _",
"1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Love is patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. it is not irritable or resentful.", Sabrina said the verse as if it was written right there.
"A girl to a girl?", Lessin scratched her chin.
Sabrina nodded, "Yeah.",
"It's not okay.", Lessin stated, stressing the word not. It wasn't meant to hit Sabrina in the face, rather it was a way of reminding herself.
"So, if I'm falling in love with a girl, does it mean I'm a sinner?", Sabrina didn't back down.
"We're all sinners, but there are sins which are bigger than others.",
"I beg to differ. I believe a sin is a sin. There's no measure.". She waited for Lessin's response but it was delayed. "Love is such a mystery.", she chuckled, "How can something so beautiful hurt so bad? Ever asked yourself that question?",
Lessin shook her head, "No.",
"Have you ever been in love?",
"I have.",
"How did it end?",
"Does love really end?", she asked, but intended for both of them, "If you really loved somebody, it's going to be like that forever. Love is like an invisible tough stain on a pure white sheet.",
"How can a stain be invisible?",
"That's love, Sabrina.",
"Comparing love to a stain is the same as saying falling in love is a shame. If you've ever been in love, you'll know that it's a privilege. Whenever I find myself falling in love I'm happy, and I envy that person for being loved by me. You love who you love, Lessin, no matter who or what they are.",
Lessin's grip around the Bible tightened, the same was her chest. How was she getting life lessons from her junior who a few minutes ago, nothing she said could have mattered?
Sabrina, satisfied with what was said, got up from the ground, patted the dust off the back of her skirt and started walking away. But a few steps later she halted and faced Lessin again. She wasn't expecting to meet Lessin's gaze on her.
"Lessin", she called, "I envy you.".
Lessin's heart stopped for a second. Sabrina walked away like a champion, heart racing from a thrilling half confession she just declared to the one person who occupied her every thought.
***