From the moment a baby is born, it is employed with a person who will love them unconditionally. Even as it grows to be a bad person, its good side will always glow the brightest in the eyes of that certain person. So if you have a heart so big to love someone with no boundaries, how great you must be? Now can a great person like you ever hurt someone who is also loved the same way by their parents?
well screw the what ifs.
How do you move on from the fact that you are the reason why someone loses their spark even if its temporary? How do i live on happy when i know i only got good lessons out from the other person while they have to live on swallowing their bitter truth? How is this a cycle to make a human being human? Why does the other person have to go down that road for my fresh life?
And I'm suddenly being too aware. The cycle of life, the hypocrisy of society, churches, relationships, how it is all tied by a string of hope which relies on comfortable lies. I can't sleep on it and wake up the next morning anymore. And again I'm so full of love and vastness at the same time. But again who even loves you if you are not tied by blood? Where do you find true moments apart from maternal and paternal moments? How dare I judge someone for being an alcoholic or drug addict or a sex worker for it is because they went down that road that clothes me with innocence and purity. These muted details of life are too loud for me to stay in the fight. There is no other way around the truth.
And when i have finally merged with the society and discipled my offspring generation, will i be content then? Maybe then when the waves come, will I run towards it and not away? Will I finally forgive myself for feeling the warmth from the hands of my own alone.