LUO FAN
When I awoke, the world was cloaked in shadows. The faint flicker of firelight danced across the canopy above me, its soft glow unable to chase away the oppressive darkness. I was lying on a thin sheet spread over the cold ground, my body aching from exhaustion. The murmured voices of Ruan Yanjun and Xiong Juan reached my ears, low and indistinct, as they stood by the fire. Their tones carried an unspoken weight, something heavy and grim.
I sat up abruptly, my heart racing. "Where is she?" I demanded, my voice hoarse and urgent.
Both figures turned to me. Ruan Yanjun's expression was as unreadable as ever, his sharp features half-hidden in the shadows. He sighed, looking away as though the answer was too burdensome to deliver. Xiong Juan hesitantly stepped forward, his hand resting gently on my shoulder.
"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I couldn't save her."
The words hit me like a hammer. My breath caught in my throat. "Did you leave her behind?"
Xiong Juan didn't respond immediately. Instead, he turned and gestured to his right. "She's there."
My eyes followed his motion, and I froze. Beneath a tree, a still form lay shrouded in a white sheet, the fabric unmoving in the cool night breeze. My chest tightened as I stumbled to my feet, rushing toward the figure. My trembling hands pulled the sheet away, and there she was. Jinjing's face, serene in death, greeted me. Her skin, once vibrant and warm, was pale and cold. Her body, stiff and lifeless, bore the unmistakable finality of her passing.
Tears spilled freely down my cheeks as I knelt beside her. My hands cradled her face, my fingers brushing against her icy skin. A sob tore from my throat, quiet but filled with despair, as I pulled her into my arms.
This was my fault. My selfishness had led her here, to this cruel end. I had known deep in my soul that staying with her would endanger her life, but I had refused to let her go. I had clung to the illusion of normalcy, to the hope of keeping her by my side. And now, she had paid the ultimate price for my stubbornness.
"I told you, didn't I?" Ruan Yanjun's voice came from behind me, cold and sharp. "Without me, you're just a helpless little kitten."
My grief turned to anger. I whirled to face him, my voice trembling with fury but I still tried to speak softly. "You were there, weren't you? You were there when they killed her, but you just watched."
He tilted his head, his expression indifferent. "As I said, I was there to watch a show."
"Are you satisfied?" I asked, my voice breaking. "Are you happy now?"
"Happy? No. But satisfied? Yes," he replied, his tone devoid of emotion. "It played out exactly as I expected. Betrayal always ends this way."
"So you knew. You knew everything from the start, but you kept it to yourself."
"You trusted her," he said coolly. "You chose her over me. Tell me, if I had warned you, would you have believed me? And I did give you a hint, didn't I?"
I clenched my fists, wanting to yell at him, to curse him, but my grief was too overwhelming. I could only sit there, trembling and broken.
"You told me to leave you alone, A-Fan," Ruan Yanjun continued, his voice calm yet cutting. "And I did. Why are you complaining now?"
"You should have stopped her from coming for me, at least," I whispered.
He let out a low chuckle. "That was her choice. She wanted to prove she regretted betraying you. Why should I interfere with such a noble act?"
"You knew they would kill her," I said through gritted teeth. "Did you set her up?"
His smile was faint but bitter. "I admit I never liked her for you. I admit I felt slighted when you chose her over me. But I am not some petty fool. I don't kill my rivals. I defeat them."
"Then why didn't you save her?"
"It was not my responsibility to protect her. It was yours. Why blame me for your failure?"
I turned back to Jinjing, my hand stroking her hair gently. "Lord Ruan, you are as powerful as the gods. Why didn't you use that power to save the weak?"
"Ask the gods that question," he retorted. "Where were they when you needed them? Why didn't they come for you? Why must it always be the devil who rescues you?"
His words cut deep, but I couldn't bear to argue any longer. "Please, leave me," I murmured.
Ruan Yanjun's smirk returned, colder than ever. "A-Fan, my leniency ends here. I granted your wish to prove yourself, and you failed. From now on, I'll be the one in control."
"You still insist on using me to fulfill your ambitions," I said bitterly.
"Your fate is sealed. You have no choice."
I bowed my head, too drained to fight him. "If you can give me a small piece of land to bury her, I will serve you. But I will not wage war against my family. If you want the crown, pursue it yourself. I will neither oppose you nor support you."
For a long moment, he was silent. Then, he nodded. "Fair enough. Leave the burial to me. For you, I will grant her the grandest funeral and a place of honor for her rest."
"Thank you," I whispered, the words hollow in my mouth.
As he turned to leave, he paused. "Congratulations on breaching the second level. I suppose you didn't even notice."
For a cultivator, advancing a level was a moment of great triumph, a milestone to be celebrated. But as I knelt beside Jinjing's lifeless form, the achievement felt meaningless. She was gone. I had failed her. What reason was there to continue cultivating if I couldn't protect the ones I loved?