Instead of studying with the money my father earned through so much hardship, I had become restless for a boy. What else could this be for me but a lesson?
The umbrella is still folded in my hand. I'm walking through the drizzling rain, getting slightly wet, heading toward my destination. I deeply wish it would rain heavily right now. The rainwater would mix with my tears, and perhaps some of my mistakes would wash away. But my desires have now fallen into the abyss of incompleteness. Who knows if I'll have to endure this forever?
That day, even though it didn't rain heavily, I caught a fever from getting soaked. I had collapsed onto my bed face down and didn't get up. The others in the room thought I was sleeping, but I couldn't explain to anyone that I hadn't slept a single minute that entire night. Lying there, I heard Shubha, Diya, and Ruhi scolding me for not eating dinner. They threatened to tell my father. They often did this.
Early that morning, I got up and cried bitterly on the empty balcony, staring at the sky. Betrayal from both sides—on one side, I was betrayed, and on the other, I betrayed my family! Do I even deserve to live? Will my life ever be meaningful again? How will I face my family? My father had so many dreams for me. My brother isn't even close to studying. All my father's dreams rested on me. How can I face him with this shame? Maybe death would be better! Just thinking about it made my chest tighten. No, no—my mother and grandfather wouldn't be able to handle it. My father wouldn't be able to live without me.
So, what should I do?
Can I fix this in such a short time? Why did I take on this challenge? If my results are bad, I'll become a laughingstock in front of so many people! What will I do? What will I do?
I grabbed my hair with both hands and asked myself these questions.
The whole day passed, and I didn't eat anything. By evening, the fever subsided a bit. I remember drinking a glass of water. I had no answers to anyone's questions, and their pleas for me to eat didn't reach my ears. They must have realized something had happened with Tiyas. But no one knew what. Tiyas had cut off all communication with them.
The next morning, around 11:30, the guard uncle called my name for a long time. But I was too weak to get up. I managed to freshen up and slowly went downstairs to the guest room. Everything looked blurry. Two days of not eating, despair, and swollen eyes from crying—when I looked at myself, I heard a familiar voice shout, "Lia!"
I covered my eyes and softly said,
___"Dad, you're here?"
Dad rushed over and hugged me, breaking into tears. My heart was breaking at his crying. I couldn't bear it. Sobbing, I said,
___"Dad, forgive me. I'm not worthy of being your daughter. I've made a huge mistake, Dad. I'm not capable of fulfilling your dreams. I have nothing left to do!"
Dad placed his hands on my cheeks and said,
___"My daughter doesn't make mistakes. I believe in you, Mom. I'll hear everything later. Now, let's go out. You need to eat first."
Then Dad took me to a food stall. He fed me rice and fish with his own hands. As he gently stroked my head, he said,
___"This is the first time I've seen my daughter break down like this. I've seen you cry twice before—once when your brother died, and the other time when I scolded you. You cried so hard that day and said you could bear your mother's scolding, but not mine. Since then, I've never scolded you. Tell me, have I ever scolded you again? No matter how big a mistake you make, I won't scold you, Mom. Please, don't cry anymore. Do you know how dark my world became when Ruhi called and told me you hadn't eaten for two days and were just crying? I don't know how I made it here. The whole way, I kept thinking, 'When will I reach?' I couldn't fly fast enough. Now, tell me, why did you break down like this? Whatever the reason, I won't say a word."
Crying, I said,
___"Dad, a month after starting college, I stopped studying altogether. At this age, many girls make mistakes, and I made the same one. But I was betrayed on a massive scale. Now, I have no way to fulfill your dreams or fix my mistakes! In the middle of it all, I took on a huge challenge, and I can't even come close to achieving it."
Then I told him everything about Tiyas, from the beginning to the end. In school, if anyone proposed to me, I'd tell Dad, and he'd explain things to me. But this was the first time I kept it hidden for so long. If I had spoken up earlier, maybe things wouldn't have gone this far. Maybe I learned to keep secrets because this was meant to happen to me.
After hearing everything, Dad didn't panic. He understood that I regretted betraying his dreams more than anything Tiyas had done. Dad smiled slightly and said,
___"I'm proud that you finally challenged him! That's my daughter. I know you can do it. Even if others doubt your abilities, your father never will. I've known you since you were this small, Mom. You can do it, and you must. From now on, don't think of this as doing it for your father. Learn to think of your career as your own. The person who betrayed you tried to suppress your talent—now, unleash it twice as strong. Shove the dirt back into the faces of those who betrayed you! Do it for your own worth. Grow so big that no boy like him will ever have the power to reject you. If anyone does, it'll be you rejecting them."
I just stared at Dad. His words were piercing through my weaknesses, shattering them completely. A fierce desire to live with my head held high rose within me. Dreams of becoming worthy awakened. I had to become as worthy as Dad said—so worthy that no one could reject me.
Suddenly, Dad asked,
___"What happened to your phone, Lia?"
As we walked out, I said,
___"Dad, my phone got ruined in the rain two days ago."
Hearing this, Dad took out his SIM card from his phone and handed it to me, saying,
___"Keep this for now. Later, I'll buy you a better phone. Come on, let's get you a new SIM."
I quietly took it. I didn't refuse, fearing Dad might get upset. Dad bought me a new SIM.
Then we took a rickshaw to the hostel. Dad gestured for me to go inside. I looked at him and softly said,
___"Dad, please don't tell Mom."
Dad smiled and nodded. I kept looking at him as I walked inside.
As soon as I entered, I sat down with my books. My roommates were surprised to see me after so long. They couldn't understand what was happening with me. But I knew what I needed to do.
I threw myself into studying like a madwoman. I didn't even notice when morning came.
Where I should have been lost in heartbreak, I was now lost in studies. I didn't want to waste even five minutes organizing myself. I listed problems and sought solutions from teachers. The teachers who had once loved me were thrilled to see me focused again and were extremely helpful. I could get solutions from them anytime. I didn't have a second to think about Tiyas. Still, sometimes I noticed my vision blurring. I'd wipe my eyes with my left hand while flipping pages with my right.
Fifteen days later, there was a mock exam. When the results came out, I was in 11th place, shocking the entire class. Dipti had come first. I was also surprised by Tiyas's results. I thought he was careless, but he was in 15th place. Maybe he had acted like he didn't study at all, but he had been studying all along.
On results day, Tiyas tried to talk to me, but I ignored him.
Before the finals, my confidence in my preparation had reached such a level that the teachers' expectations were back on me. Ten days before the exam, the English teacher conducted a separate test, where I scored not just the highest but an unbelievable score. That day, I saw dark clouds on Dipti's face. It was the first time I felt a sense of satisfaction.
The next day, Tiyas tried to contact me through my roommates. But I had warned them beforehand—if they tried to talk to me about him, I'd move to another room. I knew Tiyas would try to distract me again. So, they ignored him as much as possible.
Over the past two months, there had been a strange change in them too—they put their phones aside and studied. Maybe they realized the importance of studying as exams approached, or perhaps seeing me study motivated them. It's true—one person's enthusiasm can inspire others.
Every day, I only spoke briefly with my parents, spending the rest of my time studying.
Before I knew it, exams arrived. That year, a new magistrate was on duty, and on the very first day, the entire hall's students were terrified. Those who had planned to cheat with money were left biting their pens, helpless.
I, however, was oblivious to everything and performed well in all my exams. I had no reason to pay attention to anything else.
After the exams, I went straight to Dhaka. I had told Dad I'd try for admission everywhere except Chittagong. Dad agreed. He had to take a huge loan for my admission coaching, but he didn't regret it. He believed I'd achieve something great.
When the results came out, I was on my way home. After praying two rak'ahs of nafl, I begged Allah to let my efforts bear fruit and fulfill my dreams.
Yes, that day, my prayers were answered. I had achieved the best results from the top college in the board. Dad cried for a whole hour out of joy. That day, I realized how happy parents are at their child's success. My mother and grandfather kept kissing my forehead. My little brother proudly bragged about my results throughout the village.
In their happiness, I deeply regretted the past year and a half of my life. But I also thanked myself for realizing it in time. If I had given up back then, how would I have seen this happiness today?
Alhamdulillah, I got admitted to the first place I applied to, so I didn't try elsewhere. I had hoped never to see Tiyas again, but it happened. I went to college to collect my certificate of appreciation. That day, there was an event to honor the top 15 students. Dipti's results weren't among them. I had doubted her exams—did she really come first in class exams on her own merit, or was there another reason? Otherwise, how did she perform so poorly in the finals?
Throughout the event, Tiyas kept looking at me. After the event, as I walked out with my award, Tiyas ran up behind me and said,
___"Prili, will you talk to me for five minutes?"
I pretended not to hear and stepped outside the gate. Tiyas stood there and called out louder,
___"What happened to your hair? Why is it so short?"
Without looking back, I said,
___"It left, just like a traitor!"
Then I saw Dad waiting with a rickshaw. That was the first time Dad saw Tiyas. And I wanted to see him one last time… but I didn't.
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T/N: If you like it please vote with power stone please. More stones equals faster release.
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