"Ow ow ow ow ow! Aura, stop pulling for a moment! It's going to tear off! Aah... Ahh... Damn demon strength!"
"Oh, I'll think about it," I replied.
And here we have this idiot, who immediately got caught in a treasure chest trap just inside the entrance of a cleared dungeon.
By the way, since I had the chance, I tried on an adventurer-style outfit, or rather, the outfit I knew from my knowledge, which combined the light armor and skirt of Aura the Guillotine, for the first time in my life. As always, the design is godlike in the otaku sense. And it fits my body very well.
When I showed it to my husband and Aurelia, she muttered to herself, "I wonder what the meaning of that belly button hole is. I'm heading into the depths of the dungeon to find out the truth..." and tried to enter the dungeon, so I strangled her to stop her.
... Later, when I got home, I decided to have s*x with my husband using this at night.
"So, what do I do about this?"
"You don't know? In situations like this, you push it back in. The mimic will gag and stop biting. But it only works if there are two people."
"Normally, you wouldn't end up in this situation to begin with."
How does she even know how to handle something like this...?
At least, when angered and struck, a mimic doesn't sprout a torso, legs, arms, and a tongue from the bottom of the chest to become a 2–3-meter creature that kicks out a ridiculously beautiful spinning side kick. Small blessings, I guess.
"What about when you're alone?"
"I'll blow it up from the inside with an offensive spell. I don't like it because it'll make my hair frizzy..."
"I see..."
The thought of Frieren with frazzled or afro-like hair amused me, so I followed her instructions and pushed her further into the mimic.
"Hnnngh!"
"Ugh...!?"
『――――!?』
With my strength, the mimic slid halfway off Frieren, and when I pulled her out, she came free with a satisfying sound.
For some reason, Frieren's head was tilted slightly, but I didn't pay it any mind. Naturally, I blasted the mimic with magic to obliterate it.
"...(punching noises)"
"Why are you hitting me when I just saved you?"
"Aura... you were messing with me, weren't you?"
"How rude. Demons don't have such emotions," I replied. Regardless of whether our village New Year's games of sugoroku always ended with me targeting Frieren and it escalating into a real fight, that's unrelated.
"Don't lie, demon."
Setting that aside, the first thing that struck me upon entering the dungeon was the absurd number of mimics.
We'd just started walking down a single, narrow corridor, but treasure chests were sparsely lined up along the walls every few meters. Even before reaching the end, I could see dozens of treasure chests. Using Spell to analyze treasure chests: Mikheit over the area confirmed that every single one was a mimic.
All mimics... Really? If villagers fled in here, no wonder the bandit group stopped pursuing them. This place is an absolute nightmare.
"Aura, open that chest."
"You little...!"
Frieren retaliated with my own curse, forcing me to comply. Five hundred years old, and she's still so petty...
Incidentally, my Spell of Obedience: Auserlese requires both the intent to issue a command and the will to enforce obedience. That's why I often appear to make small rebellions against Frieren.
That's also one reason I don't typically use Auserlese. It involves weighing the odds, succeeding, envisioning the command, speaking it aloud, and enforcing obedience.
There are too many steps. If it takes longer than a blink of an eye, even I could just cast body enhancement magic and charge in to cut the scales—and the arm holding them—off with ease. I can't stake everything on such a process.
『――――(munching noises)』
...Such thoughts ran through my mind as I found myself inside the mimic's mouth.
"Any thoughts?"
"It's lukewarm."
"Anything else to say?"
"I won't do it again."
Someday, I'll get my revenge... Just you wait...
『――――!?』
With that vow in my heart, I deactivated the Draft Handle spell I always keep on myself to dull the tips of my horns, which could be dangerous if touched by humans or children.
Grasping the mimic from the inside, I planted my feet firmly on the ground and relied solely on raw strength to headbutt my way out. My horns pierced straight through the mimic, pinning it to the wall.
The mimic dissolved into dust, leaving behind only its slimy, slightly smelly saliva. Why do things like this never disappear even though the creatures themselves turn to dust?
Anyway, I was finally free. My unusually sharp horns had proven useful for once—
"Aura, help me."
"...What are you doing now?"
There she was: the 500-year-old elf, Frieren, once again trapped in a mimic just beside the one I'd defeated.
Even I briefly considered leaving her behind and going home, but I reluctantly grabbed her waist to make the mimic gag her out again.
"...Aura, you know the Mikheit spell is 99% accurate, right?"
"And?"
For some reason, Frieren started talking while still halfway eaten.
As always, she never admits her mistakes. But since she'd already confirmed with Mikheit that they were mimics, I listened.
"In that 1% margin of error, historical discoveries have been overlooked by even the greatest mages. What if something incredible lies hidden here in this dungeon?"
With an unusually passionate tone, Frieren whispered:
"Wouldn't that... be such a waste?"
Historical relics... rare treasures... a 1% chance... Could it be... that high?
"That's insane...!"
Are the chances really that high!? The chances of summoning a Heroic Spirit are 0.8% in Fate/Grand Order, and in Genshin Impact, it's even lower, at 0.6%!?
"Looks like you understand, Aura."
Muttering something incomprehensible like, "I knew Aura was one of us," Frieren was pulled free of the mimic.
But hearing her reasoning, the mimics suddenly began to look like a mountain of treasure. Neither of us would die from being eaten, so maybe it wasn't such a big deal after all.
"...Just this once, okay?"
Moreover, I will continue to say these words even 500 years from now, but that is a story that has nothing to do with the present me.