As gravity's inexorable pull dragged her back to the ground, Sakura spun through the air, slashing at Orochimaru's chest. But the instant her sword made contact with him, he exploded into a shower of white snakes that quickly wrapped around her body, binding her tightly!
"Orochimaru Style: Substitution Jutsu!"
Orochimaru had shed his skin, vomiting his real self from his entrails, while the shed skin had turned into a multitude of snakes!
'Ewwww!' Inner Sakura squealed. 'It's all slippery and slimy and GROSS!'
As expected, if she tried anything without resorting to trickery, Sakura wouldn't even get to touch even a single hair on Orochimaru's real body. If she wanted to slice his host body's breasts and steal his chakra, she would have to fall back on the age-old wisdom of Hunter x Hunter: hunting the hunter at the very moment it prepared to land the killing blow on its prey.
Or in other words: the mantis stalks the cicada, unaware of the oriole behind!
Orochimaru barely gave Sakura a second glance, briefly noting the passing resemblance between her and his former teammate, before locking onto his true target…
"Hang on, Sakura!!"
Naruto had successfully managed to wrangle his privates back into his clothes and zip up his pants without grievously injuring his most treasured appendage in the process, before rushing to Sakura's side, slashing at the white snakes on her body with his kunai to free her from her bindings. As for Sasuke, he began flinging his fancy shurikens and kunai attached to wire strings at Orochimaru in an attempt to set up the battlefield in his favour.
"Thanks, Naruto," Sakura called out gratefully, as she quickly backed away from Orochimaru.
"No need to thank me," Naruto said, grinning and flashing her a thumbs up. "It's what teammates are for!"
Naruto turned his attention towards Orochimaru, and energized by Sakura's words, he summoned as much chakra as he could muster, unaware of the true strength of the man standing before him…
"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"
Dozens of Naruto poofed into existence all around Orochimaru, before simultaneously jumping at him in an attempt to bury him under their combined weight. Unfortunately, in an incredible display of anti-synergy, many of them ran into the sharp razor wires that Sasuke had literally just set up, exploding before they could even reach their target. As for the few survivors, they simply fell to Orochimaru's Taijutsu.
"Naruto, you idiot!" Sasuke snapped at Naruto. "Didn't you see what I was doing? You were supposed to attack from range to force him to move into the wires! Now, he knows where they all are!"
Indeed, after saving Sakura, Naruto should have retreated as well. Due to the possibility of friendly fire, he was also blocking his teammates from attacking from range, simply by standing next to Orochimaru.
"How was I supposed to know?" Naruto shot back angrily. "You're the one getting in my way!"
The two boys glared at each other, absolutely fuming, but upon hearing Orochimaru's cold laugh, they turned their attention back to the main threat, cold sweat running down their temples.
"It's been a long time since the last time I've been underestimated this much," Orochimaru chuckled, emanating a sinister killing intent. "It's a novel feeling, I must say…"
Orochimaru wanted to see Sasuke's true skills in action before he finalized his decision to make him his next replacement body, but the Nine-Tails Jinchūriki was getting in the way of his observations. Therefore, he simply decided to remove him from the equation by bringing in a little helper…
Orochimaru bit his thumb until he drew blood, before smearing the crimson liquid in a straight line on his left wrist, upon which a curled-up snake had been tattooed.
"Summoning Jutsu!"
Space-time warped, and a cloud of white smoke burst outwards from where Orochimaru had once stood; and from the smoke appeared a gigantic snake, instantly dismantling the intricate death trap of wires that Sasuke had set up around him in the process.
A mass of air, displaced by the sudden apparition of the creature, rushed outwards in all directions, knocking Sakura off her feet and sending her tumbling head over heels backwards. After flipping over a few times, Sakura finally managed to gather some chakra at the tips of her fingers and toes, stopping her uncontrollable flight by sticking to the ground on all fours.
"Oh?" came Orochimaru's voice from above her; he was now standing on the snake's triangular head. "You're still standing? Not bad..."
Sakura glanced sideways to check on her comrades; Naruto had flown off somewhere, but Sasuke was also somehow still standing, glaring fiercely at Orochimaru with his black eyes.
"Such sinister eyes," Orochimaru chuckled, a hungry look in his own eyes. "However, will you still be able to maintain that expression once I'm through with you?"
'This isn't the time to be saving chakra!' Inner Sakura cried. 'Bring out the Sharingan, already!'
Without so much as a warning, two thick white snakes shot out from Orochimaru's sleeves and rapidly extended towards them, tongues flickering and fangs bared; he had partially transformed his arms into snakes.
Sakura's Manyuu blade flashed, cleaving through the snake aimed at her, while Sasuke threw a handful of shuriken to intercept the snake before it had even made it to him.
Their opponent was smiling; Orochimaru was clearly playing around with them, but from the look on his face, he seemed satisfied with Sasuke's performance so far…
…And that's when it all went wrong. Sakura's world went red pain; blood sprayed out from her body from the innumerable wounds she had suffered in a split instant. Unable to understand what had just happened, she fell to her side limply, and watched as Sasuke suffered the same fate. In a few more moments, they would both be dead…
'This can't be real,' Inner Sakura cried weakly. 'This can't be happening…'
And that's when Sakura realized that Inner Sakura had to be correct; this couldn't be happening, because there was no way that Orochimaru would kill his prize so easily! This had to be a Genjutsu, because the alternative was that her dying body was lying on the ground in a pool of its own lifeblood, slowly growing colder as it dreamed of its final moments!
Dying from cooming too much was acceptable, but dying like this? This was a fate that Sakura was unwilling to accept!
Inner Sakura screamed mentally, and Sakura screamed in reality. She desperately cycled the chakra in her body, in an attempt to return the disturbed chakra in her brain to its normal flow and end this false world.
At last, the world swam back into focus. Sakura was still standing; she had thought herself gone, but here she was, still alive! Sasuke, on the other hand, was not faring as well as she had. He was kneeling, panting heavily, and his face had turned pale. He had planted a kunai in his thigh, in order to forcefully distract his mind from the illusion by using pain…
"At last, the Sharingan…" Orochimaru said softly, as he gazed at the boy standing below him.
All in all, he was very pleased with the boy's display. As for the girl standing next to him, she was quite good, but it was nothing he hadn't seen before. In his eyes, there was a stark difference between ordinary geniuses and true geniuses…