Requiem
"Fuck."
The battlefield was a graveyard of broken steel and shattered hope. Smoke choked the sky, blotting out the sun, while distant echoes of battle faded beneath the weight of silence. Nathan lay among the fallen, the strength in his limbs long since drained, his wounds a persistent ache—yet none of it compared to the storm churning inside him.
He could still see their faces.
Jun. Samantha. Stella. Circe. Emilia.
Jun, the promising star in the field of Spire's world of swordsmanship, the leader of their patch-like group of fighters. Charismatic, strong, brave, steadfast and kind, everyone looked at him in fervor and awe, etched as a respectable figure in their minds, and worst of all, the man never disappoints. The people admired him, the girls flocked at him, even the group was composed of all his lovers, and Nathan was just a baggage they bring for reconnaissance. He hated him for that perfection he had, his opinion to him was all but nice.
'A damn harem protagonist in the midst, who would've thought.'
Stella, the marksman of the group, her sight and accuracy unquestionable for all to see, her arrows always find their mark, even if it was on his chest where his heart was. She never liked him, often draping him in humiliation, all because she was a pampered bitch.
'Yeah, still a bitch.'
Circe, the prodigy in magic, a young, genuine, and powerful mage, her spells and their effectiveness are yet to be compared to anyone, she was often aloof, not giving him a glance when near, and he didn't mind that. Not at all.
'No comment…'
Emilia, the girl who were more courageous than him, she often find herself in the frontlines, defending the front and not letting the monsters claw their way into the heart of their group. With a shield in one hand and mace in other, she was the most formidable guardian that one could ask for.
'...'
Then, there's her. Samantha, the healer of their group, affectionate to all that is suffering, she's there when you have woes that needed attention, wound that needed to be healed, emotions that isn't right to be bottled. In a sense, she was the only figure of the group that truly embodied kindness, and he, even as wretched as he was, would admit that he had fallen to her with all those points said.
"Fuck." he groaned, his blurry vision seeing the dark wave nearby, it was the remains of the horde of monsters they fought on.
'Stella really is a bitch,' he thought exasperated as he realised that this was all for one thing. Judgement.
He wanted to stand up and run, but with all the debuffs, the wound he has, and the maelstrom he had on his mind? Yeah, fat chance.
His desperation were linked to his reluctance to accept everything, but what could he even do? No one will save him here, not when they left him.
As the monsters came near, his thoughts drifted back on his "comrades".
Once, they had been his comrades—his closest allies in the fight for survival. Now, they were the ones who had turned their backs on him. Left him here, broken and alone, while the enemy closed in. Nathan had called it betrayal. When they abandoned him, when they walked away without a word, he had cursed them in his mind.
He asked before, 'Why?' yet the silence coming from them was deafening.
But now...
Now, he understood.
It wasn't betrayal. It was justice.
The truth he could no longer deny clawed at him with relentless clarity. He hadn't been cast aside without reason. This was the price—the consequence of a sin he could never erase.
"We know the truth." Samantha, his once friend, his admiration, his motivation, simply spoke as she looked at him as he fall down, and that was all it took for him to understand why they had abandoned him.
He thought back to the day the Legion attacked their stronghold, a day of chaos and fear. The enemy surged like a tide, overwhelming their defenses. Screams rang out. People begged for help. And in that storm of terror, Nathan had made his choice.
He ran.
Not just to survive—but out of spite.
Spite toward Jun, their leader. The man who had everything Nathan had once dreamed of—strength, respect, the love of a woman he had silently longed for. Samantha. She had chosen Jun, and they had built a life together, a family.
That was the truth he never spoke aloud.
When the Legion breached the walls, Nathan left behind not just his duties but the very people he was meant to protect, Jun's and Samantha's child, Ruby. He watched far away as the base had been bathed with blood and chaos, he saw the inhabitants of the base turned to pieces and bits as the monsters mowed down the walls, among them were those who could not fight—those who had no chance of escape. And he had seen it happen.
He had watched from a distance as the stronghold fell. As the people he had abandoned were overwhelmed by the tide of monsters rushing in to tear them limb by limb, as he heard their desperate screams that filled him with such glee. All the while, so focused in that particular location of the base, where he had left the child, alone. And in that moment, twisted satisfaction had bloomed in his heart.
But satisfaction was a fleeting poison.
He could still remember Samantha's face when they found him afterward. The tear-streaked grief as she mourned those lost. Jun's quiet, simmering silence. Nathan had feigned injury. Spoken half-truths. And for a time, no one questioned him.
Until the truth surfaced.
It had been Stella, Circe, and Emilia who acted first. They didn't rage or demand justice. Stella simply launched an arrow while his back were turned, Circe casted multiple debuffs on him, and Emilia gave him a very solid hit.
After that, they simply...left him.
And Samantha...
Her gaze had been the most unbearable. Not angry. Not heartbroken. Just...empty. As if she had already mourned him. As if he were no longer worth the effort of hate.
Even Jun had said nothing.
Now, as Nathan lay there in the dirt, each breath a struggle, almost wheezing, he finally understood the depth of his failure, the consequences of his action and pettiness. He hadn't been betrayed. He had been measured and found wanting.
Coward. Traitor. Failure.
And for the first time, he stopped searching for someone else to blame.
Closing his eyes, he finally let everything to do it's course. No more questions, no more hate, just acceptance.
After all, who is there to blame when he was all but alone?
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