"Mmm, that was delicious," Yohan mumbled, a blush creeping up his cheeks. "I guess I got carried away..." He let out a contented sigh, patting his distended belly.
He'd unconsciously ordered extra portions of everything – succulent meat, delicate vermicelli noodles, chewy glass noodles, even thick udon strands – leaving him pleasantly stuffed but slightly uncomfortable. His sudden change of heart about Kian and the years-long yearning bubbling within him had apparently triggered an insatiable appetite.
Outside the steaming restaurant, Kian watched Yohan with amusement as he struggled to button his jeans over the burgeoning bulge. A thoughtful expression crossed his face before he spoke.
"Wait for me a moment."
He disappeared into the nearby street vendor stalls and returned moments later with two paper containers: one steaming bowl filled with tangyuan and a paper cup holding fragrant oolong tea. He offered the bowl to Yohan first, carefully placing it in his hand.
"Be careful, it's still hot," Kian warned gently. He wanted to give both to Yohan but decided it would be easier if Yohan could use both hands to savor the tangyuan without spilling, holding the tea cup himself.
Yohan took the bowl with both hands and gazed at the tangyuan nestled within their glistening syrup, illuminated by the warm glow of a nearby streetlight. They seemed to shimmer like little jewels in his hand.
"Your stomach looks uncomfortable; maybe this will help." He gestured towards the sweet dumplings with a knowing look. "Eat these first, then have some of this warm tea."
"Mmm.. Thank you..."
As they walked side-by-side towards Yohan's place, Kian paused and glanced back at him. "Do you want to find somewhere to sit or eat while we walk?" he asked softly.
"Let's walk," Yohan suggested, a playful grin spreading across his face. "It'll be more romantic." He continued savoring the tangyuan, each bite punctuated by a teasing smirk that left Kian speechless once again.
His mind lost in thought about the mysterious nature of his feelings towards Yohan. The young man was like a riddle wrapped in enigma - charming yet unsettling, familiar yet utterly unknown. How could he feel such intense emotions towards someone he had only known for weeks? It was illogical, almost frightening.
Their earlier conversation and dinner had only deepened this confusion. Yohan seemed to know him intimately – not just surface details but things buried deep within Kian's own thoughts and experiences. It was as if they shared a history far deeper than their fleeting encounters suggested - a past shrouded in mystery that tugged at Kian's curiosity like an invisible thread.
It was strange, considering Yohan's awkward behavior upon their first meeting, as if trying to pretend not to recognize Kian at all. Furthermore, Kane's obsession with Yohan was also puzzling - why would he become so attached to someone he barely knew?
"Yohan, what are you hiding from me?"
The question hung in the air like an unspoken accusation, causing Yohan to halt mid-step. Even his hand paused mid-air, holding a spoonful of tangyuan suspended before his lips.
A thoughtful silence followed before Yohan finally spoke, "What do you mean by that?" he asked evasively but then chuckled softly and leaned closer to Kian. "Well, if I'm being honest, there are indeed many things I keep from you."
He drew closer still, his gaze intense as he whispered seductively against Kian's ear, "But rest assured, my feelings for you are genuine. It's just that certain circumstances prevent me from revealing everything about myself right now. Give me time, I promise to be completely honest with you eventually," Yohan added with a playful wink. "If I told you the truth now, you might think I belong in a mental hospital."
Kian was left reeling from Yohan's cryptic words and intense gaze. His initial flustered embarrassment had morphed into something deeper - Yohan's final statement only deepened the mystery surrounding him, leaving Kian more confused and intrigued than ever.
Yohan took a step back, turning away from Kian, and resumed his walk, continuing to eat the now-cooled tangyuan. The moonlight and streetlights painted his silver hair in an ethereal glow, making him seem almost translucent against the backdrop of the night. He moved with a quiet grace that bordered on otherworldly, like he would disappear into the shadows like a wisp of smoke.
A sudden, inexplicable tightness gripped Kian's chest, a chilling sensation that sent a shiver down his spine. Watching Yohan disappear into the twilight felt like witnessing him swallowed by an abyss of darkness – even though streetlights and moonlight painted the streets in shades of silver and gray. It was as if Kian had seen this exact moment before, watched Yohan vanish into shadows only to be left with an aching emptiness.
Without conscious thought, he quickened his pace, closing the gap until he was standing directly behind Yohan.
"Kian," Yohan said softly without turning around, "Trust me." His voice held a conviction that both calmed and unsettled Kian at once. "I will never hurt you. All I want is for us both to be happy."
He continued walking, his voice barely a whisper now. "Although I'd like to say we have plenty of time... Let's build our relationship gradually... until you're ready." Yohan let out a chuckle. "I feel hypocritical saying so..."
Yohan clutched the paper bowl tighter, its contents now reduced to a pool of cold syrup at the bottom. "I don't want to waste the time I have while I'm alive, because..." he murmured as if speaking more to himself than Kian, "...we never know when death will come."
If Yohan had not experienced the dream of his death in his past life, he would have denied his feelings for Kian and wouldn't have dared to even consider a relationship with him. But seeing the past where he died and Kian followed shortly after made Yohan reevaluate everything and cherish this second chance at life. However, Kane would undoubtedly pose as the main obstacle between them.
Despite being hurt, disappointed and saddened by Kane's actions in the past, Yohan didn't hate him; strangely enough, Kane still held a place in Yohan's heart as precious family. Their five-year marriage may have only provided one year of happiness but it was still a fond memory for Yohan.
Yohan could already envision the fallout if Kane were to learn about him and Kian; it would be a storm unlike any other they had weathered before. The mere thought made his head throb with impending dread... but no, better not dwell on such things now...
Yohan halted his pacing, turning to face Kian with a newfound intensity.
"That's why I don't want us to dance around this any longer," he said, his voice low and urgent. "I want you to be brave enough to acknowledge what we both feel."
"Yohan, I..." Kian began, but the words caught in his throat.
Yohan watched as confusion clouded Kian's usually stoic features. The man who commanded respect with every icy stare now resembled a startled rabbit, vulnerable and lost beneath Yohan's gaze. It was a side of him no one else had ever seen – not even his ex could elicit such raw vulnerability from him. Only Yohan possessed that power over Kian's guarded heart.
Ignoring Kian's hesitation, Yohan strode towards a nearby trash can, discarding the paper bowl in his hand with a decisive flick of his wrist. He turned back to face Kian, taking the paper cup of oolong tea from his hand.
The tea had grown cold during their conversation – its warmth now replaced by a lingering chill that mirrored the tension in the air. Yet, even as he savored each sip, Yohan's gaze never wavered from Kian's, holding him captive beneath its intensity.
"Our feelings may be mutual," he said softly, "but if we remain tethered by unspoken expectations and continue this tug-of-war..."
His voice trailed off as he lifted the cup again, draining it in one swift motion before tossing it into the bin. He leaned in, his gaze never leaving Kian's face. The height difference between them was almost comical – Yohan practically had to tiptoe – yet it only served to heighten the intimacy of the moment. His fingers, instead of a gentle caress this time, tugged possessively at the knot of Kian's tie, pulling him closer until their chests were pressed together.
And then, he kissed Kian.
It wasn't a tentative exploration; it was a forceful claim that left no room for doubt or hesitation. His tongue slid against Kian's lips with demanding pressure, seeking entry and finding it readily surrendered. The kiss deepened instantly, becoming a tangle of limbs and heated breath as they explored each other with newfound urgency.
Kian stumbled back slightly from the unexpected assault, surprised by both the boldness and tenderness woven into each touch. Yohan even managed to transfer the lingering oolong tea from his mouth into Kian's, a surprising twist that only added to the intensity of their kiss. The liquid leaked down their chins, mingling with stray droplets of saliva as they clung together in a whirlwind of sensation.
Yohan pulled away, a lingering warmth still radiating from their kiss. Saliva and oolong tea clung to the corners of their mouths like secrets shared in the dark. He wiped a stray drop from Kian's chin with his thumb, then licked it clean with a teasing grin.
"Then...the feeling will also become cold like the oolong tea that was warm but now becomes cold after being left for a while..."
He meant to illustrate how love, if unexpressed, could fade over time. But inwardly Yohan was screaming – panic and embarrassment warring within him.
Aaahhhh!!! What have I done!!! I kissed Kian!!!! It wasn't even a short tender kiss!!! It was hot and deep… Did I look like a real man? Or more like a lovesick fool? Or... a horny pervert?
"That's why…"
Kian cut him off abruptly, his gaze suddenly serious, though his heart hammered against his ribs from the unexpected kiss. His ears were flushed crimson.
"Don't you know that the cold tea in your mouth became warm when you transferred it to me?"
"....?"
Yohan blinked, utterly dumbfounded. Why was Kian focusing on this trivial detail?
Kian leaned closer again, ignoring Yohan's bewildered silence. "Although I can't promise when I can truly accept this feeling and can accept to have a relationship with you...but can I kiss you again?" he whispered, eyes locked on Yohan's with an intensity that made him shiver.
Before Yohan could even stammer out a response, Kian captured his lips once more in another searing kiss – one that left him breathless and completely flustered.
You're still not sure about having a relationship with me, but you're already taking advantage of me?!
Kian, you perverted scoundrel!